Hey everyone. Here is my question- does anyone have a teenager who is embarrassed and angry about mom/dad having this illness?
Ok- now I am oh so off b/c I had this whole story on here and it just...poof___disappeared
So now it's going to be shorter and, depending on feedback, I'll respond when I have more energy
My 16 year old daughter and I have always been extremely close- until about 6 months ago. Condensed: I am a family therapist (SSDI now); her dad is a psychologist. I was battered by him for a decade and left when was 18 months old. I had seen 1st hand what it can do to a child who witnesses abuse by 1 parent to another. Oh yeah, he literally almost killed me and then I left.
For years it was just the 2 of us. I remarried when she was 10 (recently diagnosed). She gave her blessing and the 2 of them got along great.
A few months ago, she began saying things to me that sounded like her dad's words. "you can do a lot more for yourself than you do; I don't need you to come to my school," and worse.
I have NEVER hit my daughter-not once. She is my size (we're both a strapping size 2), and my exact height. Several months ago she lunged at me b/c I was holding her key chain. I asked her was she planning to hit me and her response was "yes I will if you don't give that back to me right now.
I, this little pacifist, turned into someone she'd never seen. Went something like this- I stood up, we were eye to eye, and said, "go ahead, just know this, you better make it good b/c I will knock you through the floor." AND I further stated, "you feeling froggy little girl, jump." She was so shocked b/c she expected me to speak calmly and process what had occurred. Ya' know, "what would have been a better way to handle your anger?" She cried and cried. I explained that threatening me/hitting me would never be tolerated.
Fast forward a few months (no details now as I am out of steam), SHE IS LIVING W/HER DAD AND WANTS ME TO MEET HER SOMEWHERE TO "discuss some issues." Refuses to come home.
I did not see my only child for: her 16th birthday, Thanksgiving, nor Chanukah.
Not once, has she asked me how I was feeling since my diagnosis- following a TEN day hospital stay. I was recently in the hospital and got a text that she had a lot of homework and hoped I felt better.
I have only seen glowing reports on this site from mom's regarding the support they get from their children. Am I t///he only one??? She has always been like my oxygen. Well, I'm breathing; but I am so depressed. Days go by that I don't get out of bed. I get dehydrated and have no interest in anything anymore.
Should anyone have, or is, going/gone through anything like this... it would help me, LOTS, should you feel comfortable sharing.
Much thanks for your time. I am grateful for this site and all of you who take the time to "listen."
Be Well. Shalom,Suzanne[COLOR="#
Comment