WHY!!????

[Cat Mom]

Well, it's Friday Lammy, I hope that your days off are Sat and Sun!

You said that you were fighting hard to accept this but it's not happening. As a previous poster said, MS will teach each you what it needs and there's no pushing through it.

I'm not sure how long you've had it for but acceptance does come. We really have no choice but to accept it, but acceptance in a good frame of mind is not a feeling of happiness (or depression obviously). It's actually a feeling of calmness about it. This calmness can be present even with a hectic, stressful life although I don't recommend that!

You've probably seen this before but the 5 stages of grief (we as MS patients gieve lots of losses as you know):

1. Denial and Isolation (where you isolate yourself away from anything to do with MS)
2. Anger (no explanation needed!)
3. Bargaining ("If only I started eating better, this wouldn't have happened)
4. Depression (reality has set in)
5. Acceptance

You can't force acceptance but you'll know when it happens. For me personally, I had a hard time with acceptance because there were so many aspects of it. Not being able to drive or work had their own Acceptances individually.

About your adrenal fatigue... please be super careful, it's main causes are prolonged periods of stress as well as illness.

I commend you for sticking to a strict diet but a girl has to enjoy a cookie now and then (or in my case, the whole row of cookies). It's not good to deprive yourself so please stop starving!

Please let us know how you're doing.
Jen

[Nanobaby]

LammyCat

I know MS is a tough pill to swallow. I've been exactly where you are. I didn't tell my ex for months that I was an MS patient. When I finally DID tell him, he acted understanding. Then he vanished.

BUT look at it this way - when the wrong people walk out of your life, it is because they are making room for the RIGHT people and things to come in.

MS is only a death sentence if you LET it kill your spirit. You have a choice to live on - but the choice is yours.

MS has done far more for me than I ever thought - it's helped me appreciate how much my family loves me, how much my animals love me & most of all, how much I never realized I had. I hope that in time, MS will open your eyes to appreciate what you DO have instead of what you've seemingly "lost." Losing a cowardly male is not much of a loss IMHO.

I will be praying for you. Peace be with you.

[unsureofanything]

to lammy

Hey Lammy

It's understandable that all that effort not seeming to amount to something would give you the absolute *** among other negative emotions.

I spent a year avoiding an entire food group (dairy) before being dx a couple of days ago. My favourite foods were dairy based and going on a heavily restricted diet is a big challenge, which in time I got used to, and the Paleo diet is no exception. I quit milk on the understanding that being allergic to dairy was responsible for the cacophany of symptoms I had. It turns out it was no doubt responsible for some, but others are MS (the distinction unclear), so I still did the correct thing in quitting dairy, and have actually more confidence in my ability to change my lifestyle post-MS dx than I would have otherwise.

It took a lot of work for me and mastering your diet has no doubt been a lot of work for you. So, be proud of the effort you have put in, but don't expect food to be the answer.

As others have said, MS does not have a known cause and therefore nothing and no-one can be blamed; it's guilt free in that respect.

From what I've learned so far, this illness also means that although we need to look after ourselves with more discretion, having a cookie every now and then is probably not putting you at risk (ask your doctor if you're not sure). FFS Lammy surely with all these dilemmas, having a cookie every so often will make you feel less deprived and that will reduce some of your stress and anger.

Treat yourself - you deserve a reward.

I have had two tubs of dairy free chocolate ice cream substitute in the last two days since the dx. **** it. I feel better for doing it. Eat your damn cookie, maybe it will help you face your anger and stop deflecting it at the people you work with.

And forgive yourself. It sounds like to me your ex wasn't right for you, even though the love was real. You will find someone else later and probably when you least expect it. Look after YOU for awhile. Break ups are hard and in this situation of yours doubly so, but believe it or not, this is an opportunity to develop more self esteem and find someone who is even better later on.

You deserve to be happy regardless.

Sorry for being blunt, but I am observing you being hard on yourself and lashing out. Stop that!!! You deserve better.

[cherylllong]

One Better

Husband mother died cancer, father in law cancer, husband ex-drug addict 20 years clean, pneumonia, lung cancer 1 lung removed, chemotherapy 1 year, operation, bels palsy, obsessive compulsive, heart attack, 58 years old, he continues to smoke 2 half pks a day, now new pass time is beer and wine. Then me dx with ms 8 months ago. Yea he's got a lot on his plate, but imagine what i am going through having to deal with my ms, pain, tremors dizzy no income. Times are really tough...............Need a break

[cherylllong]

Need to get a grip

So tired got appointment with ssi next week