Feeling Depressed @ holiday time

[Tawanda]

I hate getting dressed. It makes me think of my mom who passed away a few years ago. She never got dressed or went anywhere in her later years. Part of it is that I'm more physically comfortable in loose clothing which usually amounts to nightgowns. And yes.... I take terrible pictures. Hate to see myself in a photo. But this is a year long thing for me. Not just at Holiday time. But the anxiety is really worse in November and December.

My husband just called to ask me if it was ok to skip going anywhere this New Years Eve since our budget was so tight after Christmas and I could not have blurted out the word YES any faster. The worst part would have been...you guessed it, getting dressed since I can't go out in my flannel pants and tshirt which I wear at least 3 sizes bigger than my body!

[palmtree]

I like getting dressed, but now it takes all of my energy. I tried to put my earrings in and I realized the hole had grown back. It's been so long since I've worn them.

Everyone was horrified that my MIL wore a USC sweatshirt to church. It didn't bother me. For her God is the same no matter what you are wearing.

We didn't have picture. What a relief!

[Tawanda]

I like getting dressed, but now it takes all of my energy. I tried to put my earrings in and I realized the hole had grown back. It's been so long since I've worn them.

Everyone was horrified that my MIL wore a USC sweatshirt to church. It didn't bother me. For her God is the same no matter what you are wearing.

We didn't have picture. What a relief!

Ha ha ha. Shame on anyone who judged her negatively. Besides, God is probably a fan anyway!

[hunterd]

I came home after the family gathering Christmas eve and sat in my recliner and cried like a baby. All because the chaos and confusion were way too much for me. When you have 11 kids all in one room (five kids are still at the age where all they do is scream and yell). Christmas eve used to be my favorite, but I just sat out of the way and nodded and smiled (I faked it) the whole time. And today we are doing the same thing but it will be much quieter.

[DianeD]

I know this sounds really weird. But, I kind of like to be "left out". I feel better staying home. It's easier, quieter, less stressful. If I feel tired or in pain I can just lay back and rest. I lost my desire to go anywhere a long time ago.

I'm much like you marti! I just don't feel like appearing fussy because I have some special needs. I've kind of gotten used to it, but then I think I'm older than many here (68), though by no means am I saying this is an older person issue.

I feel guilty though since that means my dh has to forego some things he likes to join in on. Not that his doing things would bother me, but it places a burden on one's spouse to make this decision.

I think the best thing for a person to do, if you feel left out, is to speak up when these things are planned. If you invite people over with the understanding you won't be able to join them for a 'power' walk OR if you know someone who could push your chair, by all means arrange that.

I can further relate to all the 'dressing' up issues. It takes a while for me to do that.

I think a person should develop coping strategies ahead of time, like finding comfy attractive, easy access clothing. Start looking in advance. I have some basic black slacks that I can dress up, or wear with a pretty top. I'm not in a chair so I think if I were I'd opt for pretty shoes or slippers.

We should have a topic here called 'Coping' so everyone can share ideas.

Diane