Loving Someone w/1st Exacerbation

[km84]

My bf is having great difficulties with this exacerbation, which I totally understand. He does not believe in medication for MS, so he is really struggling with his options. His legs are very weak and he can barely stand up without falling back down.

He has been like this since days before Christmas 2011. He is in a rehabilitation center for about 3 weeks.

I have come to the realization, I cannot help him. I have to allow him to determine what it is he needs to do for himself. We argue now more than ever, but I do understand the pressure he faces.

He is a very loving man when he is upbeat in spirit, but it is not often at all. I know he loves me without question, but at times the person without MS gets beat down a little too.

No one wants to watch someone they love suffer. I just want people with MS to understand the things that your love one is going through as well. Each party matters!!!

[katvar]

km84, Please be patient and hang in there.

I have been on both sides of this fence. My husband suffered a major back and traumatic brain injury 15 years ago. There have been times when it was hard to stick it out because I just wanted to help and there was nothing I can do.

Now I am the one struggling - everyone deals with these things in their own way in their own time. Even after seeing what he went through I am probably not handling things the best possible way. I flat out told him that he dealt with things his way and I need time to deal with things my way.

Don't push - Let him know that you are there to support him, no matter what. You may also want to let him know that you are willing to help in whatever way he thinks best; but, he has to tell you what he needs or wants.

[kif8skip]

I can sure understand where you are coming from - it is very hard to sit back and know what to do , or not to do.

I hope you will find some support for you , as his GF , perhaps your local MS Society can help point you in the right direction.