Please help me...

[Sorrow]

Hi Everyone, I'm new here, I apparently signed up awhile ago and haven't posted. I am in desperate need for support from people like me...I feel so lost and useless most of the time. No one really understands. I am on disability and am home 24/7...people say I need hobbies, but the brain fog and fatigue from the MS make me almost comatose. I feel like I'm just floating around with no goals...I feel no fulfillment in life...all I do is cry. I want to feel like I have a purpose. I am in my late twenties with no hope...no life.

It's like one constant blow after another. Recently my SSI was reduced significantly and there is nothing I can do. I have so many questions and need help from anyone on disability...

I DREAM and desperately want to live in NY...but I am starting to feel hopeless. I want to live in a good area, but how is it possible on disability?? Does anyone know how or can give me advice...I just want my own life and independence. What are the options other than public housing? IS there any options?

I feel lost and hopeless...I want to just cry because there really seems to be no hope. Please, does anyone have any help or advice they can offer me...I really am starting to feel like it's hopeless...

Thank you for reading this anyone!

[jeannef1]

Hi Everyone, I'm new here, I apparently signed up awhile ago and haven't posted. I am in desperate need for support from people like me...I feel so lost and useless most of the time. No one really understands. I am on disability and am home 24/7...people say I need hobbies, but the brain fog and fatigue from the MS make me almost comatose. I feel like I'm just floating around with no goals...I feel no fulfillment in life...all I do is cry. I want to feel like I have a purpose. I am in my late twenties with no hope...no life.

It's like one constant blow after another. Recently my SSI was reduced significantly and there is nothing I can do. I have so many questions and need help from anyone on disability...

I DREAM and desperately want to live in NY...but I am starting to feel hopeless. I want to live in a good area, but how is it possible on disability?? Does anyone know how or can give me advice...I just want my own life and independence. What are the options other than public housing? IS there any options?

I feel lost and hopeless...I want to just cry because there really seems to be no hope. Please, does anyone have any help or advice they can offer me...I really am starting to feel like it's hopeless...

Thank you for reading this anyone!

First off you need to speak to a therapist for depression. When I was first diagnosed my neurologist told me that MS causes clinical depression itself. Maybe if you rented a room from someone in a nice area you could afford it and you would have some company to help you feel less lonely. I don't know your physical abilities but if you could do some volunteering it would take your mind off your problems and help someone else with theirs. Even a small pet would be a comfort. I hope you are feeling less hopeless by now because I just saw this today and it was written quite awhile back. Good Luck !

[JerryD]

Sorrow,
I post on this site, often. I am sorry that you are in a 'pickle'. MS sucks and it hasn't been shown to get better. The only thing that I can do for you is 'pray'. I will continue to say a prayer for you that you will get some relief from this MonSter. Good luck

[Mamabug]

Sorrow,
I post on this site, often. I am sorry that you are in a 'pickle'. MS sucks and it hasn't been shown to get better. The only thing that I can do for you is 'pray'. I will continue to say a prayer for you that you will get some relief from this MonSter. Good luck

Sure; prayer is a great thing and I'd recommend that too. But, there are meds that treat most symptoms of MS, including depression and brain fog. Jerry's take on out situation feels more negative than I think it really is.

Please see a doctor for your symptoms. And, hopefully, you'll get some good advice or good ideas about living in New York and other improvements you'd like to make.

[BadAttitude]

Ah, Sorrow, my favorite Bad Religion song.

Sorry, not trying to make light of your depression, but everything is musical with me sooner or later, even depression. Music can make you more depressed, or it can lift you up. There is NO wrong music to listen to, because whatever sounds good to you at the time is the right music to be listening to then. So music is one of the ways I manage my moods. You could try it...with a good set of speakers or headphones and access to youtube you can listen to almost anything even if you don't have the music files or recordings.

That said...how can I help you? Why do you want to live in NY? So many folks don't say where they actually live in their profiles...privacy, I guess, but it limits the help they can expect to receive from their hometown buddies or pals-to-be. What is it about your current location that you find undesirable?

Mamabug's idea to rent a room was right on. If you're near a college town, you could wind up with an awesome, energetic, and optimistic roommate that appreciates having you around for companionship or stability/guidance. As long as you do your research and vet your candidates, it could work out well for you. Younger people can be very fun to have around, as long as they are mature enough to be trusted. When I went to college, I ended up staying with an elderly woman for a while and we helped each other out. Me, needing a place to stay, and her, needing someone to help her with her diabetes management, since she had no family. She was a lovely woman and a terrific quilter. I enjoyed the time I got to spend with her when I wasn't in classes.

Don't let yourself get too down...know your tolerance level for the depression and when you feel like you can't stand it anymore, hop into the chat rooms. There's some immediate feedback for you, since there is lag time on the discussion boards. Good luck!

[Teekybird]

Hi Sorrow,
Hopefully you are checking back on here. It sounds like you may use this account infrequently and this original post was back from May. I think that there has been great advice offered. Also, this site offers good support in general. (Sorry if it took a while to respond to you this time). As B.A. mentioned, there is some lag time in getting messages posted. I have found a number of MS related groups on Facebook and responses there are pretty much instantaneous. I'm In Ohio, and there is even an Ohio-Ms group on there. Which makes me think there also could be a NY-MS group, which might be a good place to reach out to.

Also, this is a website for people in the NY area who want to get together. http://www.meetup.com/People-with-Mu...nts/224011644/

I have a local meetup group for the Columbus, Ohio area as well, so that is why I thought to check the meetup site.

Good luck to you. Hope you are feeling better and less hopeless.

[jstinnett]

Sorry you are having some troubles.

I am no guru on benefits or MS, for that matter, but I can offer some basic advice.

Don't try to take on everything all at once. It is possible to achieve all of your goals, but you will have better results if you take on one thing at a time, and avoid looking at your whole life as one single thing.
My mom used to say that it is possible to eat an elephant, but you have to do it one bite at a time.

As someone else suggested, addressing your emotional and spiritual state first is a good place to start. Once you have a little stability your ability to plan will be a lot better.

[Sorrow]

Hi everyone, I'm writing this extremely late! I haven't been here in awhile. I just want to say I got really helpful advice!! Thank you for the prayers.

Badattitude your advice helps a lot! And TeekyBird thank you for the site! Really helpful advice, thank you everyone!

I'm feeling extremely trapped. I don't know what to do anymore, hobbies don't help because I feel a lot of creative energy but when I sit down to do whatever, nothing comes out and it makes me so frustrated. I don't know what's wrong.

I want to live in nyc because my boyfriend lives there, and because I wouldn't need to have a car and so many opportunities exist there that down where I live.

Disability doesn't offer enough money to live off, I don't know what to do :'(

Thank you for the idea of living with a roommate, how do you go about finding a trustable one? Or finding one in general?

[Mamabug]

...

I want to live in nyc because my boyfriend lives there, and because I wouldn't need to have a car and so many opportunities exist there that down where I live.

Disability doesn't offer enough money to live off, I don't know what to do :'(

Thank you for the idea of living with a roommate, how do you go about finding a trustable one? Or finding one in general?

Does your boyfriend know anyone you could be roommates with? Or, does he have trusted connections, from a church he attends or a job he works at that could give some recommendations?

[Sorrow]

Does your boyfriend know anyone you could be roommates with? Or, does he have trusted connections, from a church he attends or a job he works at that could give some recommendations?

He hasn't ever even bothered to look into anything I just don't know what to do anymore, I feel so sad about all of it all the time. He definitely doesn't know anyone I could be roommates with and he doesn't really have outside connections like churches.

[Mamabug]

I like BadAttitude's suggestion about finding a college student to be a roommate. Not everyone want to live on campus. Maybe you could advertise both in the paper and at some nearby colleges to find a college roommate. Ask for references, etc, and be sure to call and check them. If you find someone of non-traditional age, even 3-5 years older than those just out of high school, and that wants to live off-campus, they may be less likely to be a party-er or something.

Or maybe, if you have a connection to a church where you live, find one of a similar denomination and ask if you can put a notice in the church bulletin.

You might just have to take the bull by the horns and take some steps and some risks. But, interview them. Meet them in person, if possible, or skype on web cam if not possible to meet. It's the next best thing. And, again, request references and check them out.

[palmtree]

You want to move to NYC because your boyfriend lives there? I can't think of a worse reason to move to a new city, especially that one. It's the most expensive place to live in the US, if I'm not mistaken.

But I don't know your current location or situation. Do you have a talent that you would like to pursue there? Is there a place on the east coast you could move to that is easily accessible by train to NYC? That way you could visit your boyfriend on the weekends, look for jobs and get to go on a train ride every week.

I was in a miserable situation a year ago. My landlord kept raising my rent and my only hope seemed to be public housing (which felt like no hope at all). Thankfully, I wanted to escape the stresses of a big city so I chose to move to a place more rural with lower rents. I researched the medical care in the new place before packing up the car. But, for me, going to a new place changed my outlook significantly.

So if you make a change, do it for the right reasons and do your homework.

[Sorrow]

So sorry for the late reply, I seem to come and go from this place, I hope you guys understand!!

I wanted to reply, Palmtree the only reason I'd move is definitely NOT just for the boyfriend and that's even a concern for him...I recently went there for an extended period of time and it was amazing for me, I have never felt that kind of freedom. I seemed to thrive there, and even when not with the bf I did a lot more than I could do here. There are also a lot more opportunities available there plus I seem to click a lot better with people from there.

So it's more than just going for him, I am definitely okay with finding a roommate. I know older people rent out rooms and that seems like something I would like to do. It's been so difficult finding good resources