Hello everyone, today is my first day here. I'm as you can guess, mom of 4 children ages range from 18 to 8. I'm also a wife to a wonderful and long suffering husband.
I'm currently waiting to get an MRI of my brain and optic nerve. Long story short, I believe I have had symptoms of MS for at least 10 years. My doctors have dismissed my symptoms as everything from "you're just a tired mom", anxiety, depression, migraine, and finally fibromyalgia. None of these felt right to me.
I knew something else was going on. My level of slurred speech, cognitive issues, and chronic fatigue just wasn't right. Going to the grocery store shouldn't leave a healthy woman in her 30's shaking from weakness. Finally, two weeks ago, I had a terrifying period of three days of double vision.
Well that got me into an Opthalmologist real quick. After many tests the doctor finally sat Mr down and asked questions. Actually, she asked the question that I know has changed my life. She asked, "When you get out of a hot shower or bath do you feel tired or weak?" The look on my face told her that yes, that was the case. I told her, "Yes, is that really a thing?" She then told me it could be and for the next half hour I proceeded to answer yes to every question she asked.
I'm sure you're all familiar with the questions. Do you have balance problems, how's your memory, does your neck ever hurt when you bend your neck forward, does hot weather make you fatigued or irritable, how often are you to tired to do things around the house, how its your vision usually do you ever have periods of extreme blurry vision or partial loss of vision?
YES! I wanted to scream but instead I started crying because FINALLY someone was not only listening to my seemingly unrelated symptoms but she was taking me seriously and asking about my symptoms before I could tell her. I was crying because I was right and someone was listening. Then after apologizing for crying I asked what was wrong.
She told me she was referring me to a neurologist who specializes in MS and ordering the MRI. I have since been back to her for more tests to rule out any physical optical problem and have found that I have lost some field of vision in my left eye and also some color recognition in the left eye as well.
My MRI appt is set for next week and I'm basically waiting by the phone for the neurologist to give me an appt time. So I've been reading and reading and reading. I have currently or have had at some time in the last ten years just about every single symptom on the various MS symptom lists.
I don't want to have MS. I want to be healthy but I'm so thankful that I finally have people and Drs paying attention to my symptoms. I have thought for years I'm just going crazy and part of me is terrified nothing shows up on the MRI. I don't want to be relegated to just another bored stay at home mom hypochondriac. Which is basically how I've been treated for a decade.
So I wait. Wondering what is going to be worse , finding out I do have MS or finding out once again they can't tel me what's wrong with me. Anyway, I guess I needed to vent. I'm in such a weird place emotionally, relieved, terrified, anxious, hopeful.
I hope some of this makes sense to someone. I don't have any family I am close to or support other than my husband and a few friends that I don't want to burden yet with my ramblings. My friends I mean, not my husband he's been with me the entire ride and is very thankful I'm finally seeing a neurologist. So, right now this is me, mom and wife waiting for the phone to ring. Please feel free to let me know I'm not having a breakdown but that there are others of you going through the same thing. I hope you're not but selfishly I don't want to be alone in my anxious waiting.
Thank you for reading and letting me purge some thoughts out of my head.
I'm currently waiting to get an MRI of my brain and optic nerve. Long story short, I believe I have had symptoms of MS for at least 10 years. My doctors have dismissed my symptoms as everything from "you're just a tired mom", anxiety, depression, migraine, and finally fibromyalgia. None of these felt right to me.
I knew something else was going on. My level of slurred speech, cognitive issues, and chronic fatigue just wasn't right. Going to the grocery store shouldn't leave a healthy woman in her 30's shaking from weakness. Finally, two weeks ago, I had a terrifying period of three days of double vision.
Well that got me into an Opthalmologist real quick. After many tests the doctor finally sat Mr down and asked questions. Actually, she asked the question that I know has changed my life. She asked, "When you get out of a hot shower or bath do you feel tired or weak?" The look on my face told her that yes, that was the case. I told her, "Yes, is that really a thing?" She then told me it could be and for the next half hour I proceeded to answer yes to every question she asked.
I'm sure you're all familiar with the questions. Do you have balance problems, how's your memory, does your neck ever hurt when you bend your neck forward, does hot weather make you fatigued or irritable, how often are you to tired to do things around the house, how its your vision usually do you ever have periods of extreme blurry vision or partial loss of vision?
YES! I wanted to scream but instead I started crying because FINALLY someone was not only listening to my seemingly unrelated symptoms but she was taking me seriously and asking about my symptoms before I could tell her. I was crying because I was right and someone was listening. Then after apologizing for crying I asked what was wrong.
She told me she was referring me to a neurologist who specializes in MS and ordering the MRI. I have since been back to her for more tests to rule out any physical optical problem and have found that I have lost some field of vision in my left eye and also some color recognition in the left eye as well.
My MRI appt is set for next week and I'm basically waiting by the phone for the neurologist to give me an appt time. So I've been reading and reading and reading. I have currently or have had at some time in the last ten years just about every single symptom on the various MS symptom lists.
I don't want to have MS. I want to be healthy but I'm so thankful that I finally have people and Drs paying attention to my symptoms. I have thought for years I'm just going crazy and part of me is terrified nothing shows up on the MRI. I don't want to be relegated to just another bored stay at home mom hypochondriac. Which is basically how I've been treated for a decade.
So I wait. Wondering what is going to be worse , finding out I do have MS or finding out once again they can't tel me what's wrong with me. Anyway, I guess I needed to vent. I'm in such a weird place emotionally, relieved, terrified, anxious, hopeful.
I hope some of this makes sense to someone. I don't have any family I am close to or support other than my husband and a few friends that I don't want to burden yet with my ramblings. My friends I mean, not my husband he's been with me the entire ride and is very thankful I'm finally seeing a neurologist. So, right now this is me, mom and wife waiting for the phone to ring. Please feel free to let me know I'm not having a breakdown but that there are others of you going through the same thing. I hope you're not but selfishly I don't want to be alone in my anxious waiting.
Thank you for reading and letting me purge some thoughts out of my head.
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