How do you stay sane and focused?

[nytransplant]

I've had symptoms for almost half a year and am still in limbo, although T3 c and t-spine MRIs at the end of the month may change that. I find that I am consumed with anxiety about my symptoms, diagnosis, and prognosis. I can't say I've experienced "cog fog," but my anxiety is making me lose my focus at work and at home. I also have a hard time being present with my family, I'm absorbed and withdrawn. I am terrified of the future and don't know if I can be strong. I know that this attitude is getting in the way of enjoying the present. Any words of advice would be greatly appreciated!

[JerryD]

Your post has expressed the way that I feel every day 24/7. I know how you feel. I don't have any suggestions for you. Stay strong. Good luck.

[Meadowsun]

Feel your pain

I feel your pain. It is hard to live in the moment when the symptoms are always present reminding me of what has changed and how ethereal it is to grasp or name or pinpoint with symptoms coming and going like an ever changing lanscape on which I cannot get my footing. Then came the moment that the possibility of a much more grave and horrible diagnosis was put forth and I began to see MS or some other unknown or unnamed disorder as not so ominous. It was a matter of perspective that I had to experience directly. I work in a hospital and I see people that are gravely ill including children that die and suffer yet my anxiety levels were still so prevalent, and still are though to a lesser degree. Accepting where I am at waxes and wanes moment to moment.

Try not to be to focused on what may be but instead on what you do have, trust the process and remind yourself that it will all be ok and will be what it was meant to be and each day begin again. Moment by moment one step at a time.

[acaverly]

I understand how you feel. I find myself thinking about what is wrong with me all the time. At home and at work. I keep googling symptoms and test results trying to figure it out. It has ben two years for me. My doctors do not believe mine is ms but I have had all the tests and a LP, several mri's. Genetic testing, tests for lupis, for a mitochondrial disease, and now looking at RA.

I also need to focus on the present and enjoy my children, but it is hard when you are experiencing symptoms.

[alishape]

Time mainly

It takes time to adjust to this uncertain condition. We all have a constant reminder of our mortality. It is difficult to deal with. I found over time that it takes more energy to let this drive you crazy than it does to just let it go. It seems like I learn something new about myself due to this disease every day. I almost always regret it when I let myself get all wound up in the possiblities and miss something that is happening now. I learned that this weekend. I am not the most introspective person, lol. I've been dealing with this for almost 2 years now and I just figured that one out. I don't think anyone here can help feeling crazy or lost or angry at times or to some degree, but we can try. It takes energy and effort, a lot sometimes, but it is worth it.

Like Katieagain says, I have MS and it has me but I am going to do what I can do while I can do it. You know before worse comes to worst.

[Seasha]

nytransplant - I'm sorry you are having a rough time. Waiting for a dx is one of the worst things I have gone through and it also affected my relationships and work ability, so I understand.

You have many good suggestions here for coping skills, but at the end of the day, sometimes it just doesn't cut it. Have you talked with your doctor lately about your increased anxiety? There are many anxiety medications that may help you get your focus back. I decided to go this route which helped immensely and my life eased up a bit. It didn't change my circumstance, but helped me cope through it better. I was able to ease off the meds after a couple years. I also started doing yoga and meditation - both great tools for calming the body and mind.

There is help out there! Think of medication as just another tool to use. I hope you see better days ahead!

[MSer102]

I think everybody here has tried to be nice and encouraging and that's good. But I think they've either missed the point or have been too polite because they didn't address your most obvious problem.

It isn't MS or the physical problems your looking for. Unfortunately your major medical problem is your anxiety. It's understandable but it isn't normal and its damaging your life FAR more than the physical condition your looking for. You already know that or you wouldn't have posted here.

You asked how people stay sane and focused. People who aren't overcome by anxiety learn how to stay sane and focused. But it doesn't matter what works for them because it won't work for you because of your anxiety.

Anxiety makes people not believe things that are true and catastrophize about things that aren't. Please talk to your PCP or neuro and get a referral to a mental health professional to deal with your anxiety.

Anxiety is your major medical problem and it can be treated and overcome. But you can't do it by yourself. You have to have a phychologist or psychiatrist to help you. Your anxiety is bad enough that you might also benefit from medication. If your willing to be on a medicine for MS or whatever that you might not even have, it makes sense that you should be willing to be on a medication for anxiety which you DO have and has taken over your life.

No matter what your other condition turns out to be, the key to dealing with it will be getting your anxiety under control. When that happens your life will become easier overall and living with whatever else is wrong will be easier. Please get professional help for your anxiety ASAP.

[Thinkimjob]

I'm with MSer102. I think your anxiety about what may be could be worse than what actually is, at the moment.

Myself, "lucky" enough to be diagnosed almost immediately. Still anxious. Still scared, but you know, what will be, will be.

Don't waste time feeling terrible. Get drugs, or counselling, deal with the anxiety. MS will give you years of trouble.

I know you're scared, but truly, bad as it is, it's not that bad.

[swingingwillow]

Hi nytransplant,

Maybe I can help because I can relate to you?

I am in limbo, however, I have mental health issues including anxiety and one of the things that I'm anxious about is this limbo land beast of a disease that has yet to be diagnosed.

I had a moment when I couldn't see and couldn't walk properly when I thought to myself why the heck and other stronger words would I want to be so anxious and physically ill for at the same time?

So I'm getting help for my mental health. I want to enjoy the time I have now, while my physical body is capable of still doing many things. I am learning how to mourn the things I cannot do without getting too upset, although there is a grief process to this.

So yes please, do yourself a favour and ask for some help for your anxiety. That way while you're getting the physical stuff sorted out you can perhaps feel a bit better.

I can empathize, it's hard but I do my best every day to take care of my mental and physical health and it helps a great deal.

You are not alone. And it's natural for a lot of people to feel as you do.