Doctor Horror Stories, Maybe i just need to vent

[Jrasted79]

I STARTED RESPONDED TO ANOTHER THREAD OF MINE AND REALIZED I WAS SO OFF TOPIC BUT REALLY NEEDED TO GET THIS OFF MY CHEST AND I WOULD LOVE IF OTHERS WOULD SHARE.

I HAVE A FEAR OF DOCTORS!! I HAVE BEEN SO MISTREATED SINCE I STARTED GETTING SICK OVER 2 YEARS AGO. I JUST TOOK A BIG LEAP AND EMAILED A DOCTOR I HAVEN'T MET AT MEDICAL CENTER WHERE I HAVE A REFERRAL PENDING RIGHT NOW. I FEEL ARE NERVOUS AND SCARED ABOUT IT I THINK BECAUSE OF WHAT OTHER DOCTORS HAVE DONE IN THE PAST. I HAVE BEEN FALSELY ACCUSED, LITERALLY SCREAMED AT, AND HAVE HAD A DOC LAUGH RIGHT TO MY FACE. BECAUSE OF ALL THIS I HAVE BEEN SUICIDAL A FEW TIMES BUT THANK GOD FOR MY DAUGHTER, HONESTLY SHE IS THE ONLY REASON I HAVEN'T AND WON'T. MY HEAD IS IN A BETTER PLACE NOW SUICIDE WISE, I KEEP LEARNING AND GROWING BECAUSE OF THIS "SICK" LOL

SO HERE ARE MY HORROR STORIES BELOW:

I HAVE HAD QUITE A FEW BAD EXPERIENCES WITH DOCTORS. IN THE BEGINNING OVER 2 YEARS AGO I HAD THE DOCTOR THAT TOLD ME "IT'S ALL IN YOUR HEAD" I THINK MOST OF US OF HAS HAD ONE OF THOSE. LOL I EVEN HAD TO GO BEHIND HIS BACK TO GET A REFERRAL TO RHEUMATOLOGY BECAUSE HE REFUSED TO GIVE ME ONE. MY RHUEMY ENDED UP BEING AN AWESOME ADVOCATE DESPITE THE FACT THAT SHE NEVER SENT ME FOR A MS WORK-UP. MY RHEUMY HAD ME ON SOME MEDS AND WAS GOING TO BE AWAY DURING THE TIME I NEEDED TO REFILL, SHE SAID JUST ASK YOUR PRIMARY CARE HE CAN SEE WHAT YOU ARE ON AND THAT IT IS REFILL TIME, SO I DID AND WOULD NOT REFILL, EVEN THOUGH HE COULD SEE I HAD BEEN ON THESE MEDS OVER A YEAR. (HE PROBABLY SAW THAT I GOT TO A RHEUMY LOL)

I TRIED A PAIN MANAGEMENT CLINIC, AND WITHIN 3-4 MINUTES, THE DOCTOR TOLD ME THAT THERE IS NO REASON I SHOULD BE PAIN AND THAT I NEED TO GO HOME BECAUSE THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE HERE THAT LEGITIMATELY NEED HIS HELP.

I HAD AN ER DOC THINK I WAS DRUG SEEKING WHEN IN ACTUALITY I HAD BROUGHT MY MEDS WITH ME, IT WAS JUST YOU KNOW THOSE MIGRAINES THAT MAKE YOU THROW UP AND NOTHING HELPS, IT WAS ONE OF THOSE AND INSTEAD HE ACCUSED ME OF BEING IN WITHDRAWAL. ONCE I BROUGHT OUT MY MEDS HE GOT SET STRAIGHT.

AND SINCE I HAVE MOVED OUT TO THE DESERT I HAD TO GO 2 OR 3MOTHS WITHOUT INSURANCE BECAUSE NO ONE KNOWS HOW TO DO THEIR JOB GRR. ANYWAYS I WENT TO URGENT CARE TO GET SOMETHING TO SLEEP BECAUSE I WAS OFF MY PAIN MEDS, MIND YOU I WASN'T EVEN ASKING FOR PAIN MEDS, JUST SLEEP MEDS, SO I TOLD HIM MY STORY MY 2 YEAR STRUGGLE AND YOU KNOW WHAT HE DOES, LAUGHS IN MY FACE!!! I WAS CRUSHED!!

[Marco]

At some point, many of us have felt frustrated or let down by the medical community. This is an oldie but a goodie on the subject:

http://www.msworld.org/forum/showthread.php?t=110617

[MSer102]

Its a good thing your coming here to vent because you cant vent at the doctors office. As soon as your emotions take over doctors get blindsided by all the emotion and have to shut it down because it interferes with their job.

It isn't fair but they aren't going to change. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome. If you keep getting laughed at or yelled at every time then it sounds like maybe you have to start doing something different when you go to the doctor that doesn't make them want to do that. And even if they do then maybe you could respond differently so the doctor visit stays on track?

One of the things I learned is I have to go to the right doctor for the right thing if I want to get something done. Specialists don't handle primary stuff and primaries don't handle specialist stuff. Even if one of them tells you that they do! It sounds like you've been going to the wrong type of doctors for some things and getting really frustrated when you find out they won't do what you need. But blaming them doesn't help. That's just the way it is. That's what I mean by they won't change so you have to.

So go ahead and be crushed a cry about it for awhile. But that doesn't get the problems solved. If you vent at the doctor it doesn't make the other doctors look bad - it makes YOU look bad. It isn't fair but that's the way it is. So I think its good that your venting here.

One of my favorite episodes of Seinfeld is where George decides to do everything the opposite of what he was doing and his luck changes and things start going really well for him. So if whatever you've been doing at the doctor for the last 2 years hasn't been working then maybe you could try doing the exact opposite and see if things go better for you?

[Jrasted79]

Thanks Marco, a good read indeed!!!

I tried a form of therapy drawing a self portrait portraying how you feel. It ended up looking like something they would put a toddler in serious therapy for LOL I was gonna make it my avatar but can't figure out how to change it. I'm gonna send it to my mom, I am always trying to find new ways to help her understand what I am going through but she always says, I forget things too, I get tired too, it's not the same and someday I have to just let go and realize no matter how hard I try she will never understand because she is not in my body, but I do give her credit, she tries, and she definetly gets worried when she has to drive over to my house to pick me up off the floor because I cant even get up to my bed 10 feet away, good thing I have learned to always keep my phone in a pocket.

oh my tinglys coming on strong!! gotta stop typing

[Geekerbell]

Well, I'm one of those people who hates going to the doctor at all, so when all this craziness started snowballing from December til now... Well, it may seem to some people like attention seeking, going to the dr over and over, asking for referrals, etc, but it is really the last thing I want to be doing. And honestly, since I'm starting to have some decent days, part of me really wants to cancel my next appointment in April, but my husband insists I keep it. And if I'm honest with myself, I know I need to.

My biggest fear with this next appointment is that he will dismiss me like the first neuro did. So I keep trying to figure out what to do differently in order to be taken seriously. But I don't think I did anything at the other appointment to cause him to treat me like he did. Was I extremely nervous? Yes. Did I get upset and emotional about things? Only after he refused to look at the list of symptoms I had filled out on his paperwork (that the nurse gave me), told me that the ophthamologist was wrong and I didn't have optic neuritis, did not do a complete exam, said aside from two lesions on my brain MRI it looked fine, and then asked why I was there. Yes, then I got upset and cried. He was rude and dismissive, how could I not?

I am really hoping that my next appointment, with a new specialist, goes much better. I have said it before, I don't know if I have MS, and I really hope I don't. But I do know that something is wrong with me, and I want to find out what it is and learn what to do about it. I'm the kind of person who will typically go years between doctor appointments. It has to be something affecting my life in a big way for me to seek out help.

[Jrasted79]

I have taken so many different approaches, the maddening thing is that I am on medi-cal and they dictate who you can see and what medicines you can take. Referrals take forever and they deny them when there is plenty of evidence that you need to see the specialists.

I have never complained about one doctor to another because you never know who knows who and that could backfire. I have lost almost everything because of this "sick" to the point that I live in the middle of nowhere and that makes everything so much harder, having to drive an hour for groceries, stuff like that.

Before I got sick I was in the prime of my life, worked my way up to an executive level position for a worldwide company, I lived in Orange County, CA single mom, a total success. Being sick has left me devastated and depressed.

I lived my life right did all the right things so when it comes to being invalidated it is also devastating.

I just got my two appointments for disability today, the mental and physical exam so at least some things are moving along. I have prepared myself for denial of benefits, but I know I can fight it and at least I got the ball rolling.

I just needed to hear that I am not the only one with horrible luck and it kinda makes sense, with diseases that are not easily diagnosed there are always bad apples out there trying to play the system for disability or drugs which make the doctors more cautious.

I saw my nice doctor today and he just threw his hands up and said honey, this is out of my league, you need a neurologist so just hang in there for the referral to go through and if it gets denied he will make phone calls on my behalf. I've been waiting over two years, another week won't kill me.

[puglover]

I feel for you. I have met more bad doctors than good. I was also told that it was all in my head and that physically there was nothing wrong with me and for many years I actually beleived this. Don't let this happen to you.

After 20 years I finally got a diagnoses. It was very unexpected.

The only thing that I can recommend is keep looking for a dx but try your best not to dwell on it, as hard as that is. Try and live your life the best that you can and eventually you will have answers.

Good luck and my prayers are with you.