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Newly diagnosed, custody issues, relationship issues, feeling scared and alone

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    #1

    Newly diagnosed, custody issues, relationship issues, feeling scared and alone

    I don't know what to do. I was diagnosed thursday and again today by my regular Neuro( the one that diagnosed me was someone I was seeing fr a second opinion) the neuro said there's no room for question my spinal fluid was just incredibly supportive of ms. I'm also a single Mother in a same sex relatiOnsip. My son is almost 2 (his bday is 10/27) I'm 24. Right now my ex is withholding him from me because he's quite honestly a dbag and a liar and I don't feel like going into that. I'm in NO WAY A BAD MOM and did not have my son taken by law. He's mentally unstable. And I have to go to court to get him back. Dont even wanna go into that right now but I'm a stay at home mom and my life is SO EMPTY without my son.

    My gf recently moved in and were already having problems. It sucks. She blames EVERYTHING on my "mood swings" when really I just have some
    Self esteem Problems and need a little extra support and love. She never initiates sex hardly even though Wr spent the last 3 months apart and she talked about how bad she wanted tO make love all the time. Shes a joker and picks on me alot which I'm totally ok with cuzni know she's
    Just playing (known and been close frieds with her for 7 years btw) but sometimes it'd be nice to hear how much she loves me and that I'm beautiful and sexy bit nope. I've told her his but she acted like nothing. She acts like me being upset and hurt by her actiOns is all my fault and my problem or ignores it. idk what to do to get through to her I feel so alone in this battle with ms too. She doesn't understand how my body hurts an that even though I look great I feel quite the opposite. She says she understands but she also makes little jokes about me being "lazy" idk I just feel do alone buy beer here at MSworld.
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    #2
    Oh my

    The end is supposed to say never here lol not buy beer hahahahaha

    Comment

      #3
      I'm sorry for all your troubles MandyPandy..good way is to start by writing down the problems and then start making a list of possible solutions or steps to start.....

      It does help then to look at your list and decide where to start, I'm sure there is a free legal service in your area..do you have family? other friends?..don't focus on the negative(It is possible), make positive steps towards solutions....Good luck!
      Susan......... Beta Babe since 1994....I did improve "What you see depends on where you're standing" from American Prayer by Dave Stewart

      Comment

        #4
        My heart broke for you... until I read "buy beer here at MS World"... you made me laugh so you've already brightened someone's day without even trying!

        I'm so sorry that you are going through so many huge issues on top of being newly dx. You must feel like everything is crumbling around you right now. Same sex or opposite sex, it is impossible for our spouses to know how we feel. It must be harder at such a young age. I know you want to be thought of as a woman, not a walking disease, maybe she doesn't initiate anything out of fear that she'll hurt you.

        I can fully understand how empty you feel without your son, that must be the biggest worry of yours and is probably overshadowing everything. I'm assuming you meant your ex is mentally unstable, not your son. Keep detailed notes for when you're ready for court, even things that seem menial and small. My DH fought for, and won custody of his 3 boys in 2009 (he and his ex had joint custody but they didn't want her to have any say in their lives due to her mental instability) so it's not impossible!

        I urge you to keep reaching out for support wherever you can find it. Even here, no beer though! You need to feel like a valued human being, once you get enough strength, fight for your son with everything you've got. In the meantime, vent away... you have every right.

        Warm regards,
        Jen
        RRMS 2005, Copaxone since 2007
        "I hope to be the person my dog thinks I am."

        Comment

          #5
          Lol

          I know the buy beer was epic. For sure. Thank you all for your support. I'm trying to remain positive but I'm broke and just physically EXHAUSTED. Like its ridiculous how TIRED I am. I have barely ANY energy. If my gf would let me I'd probably just waste away in bed all day. I know that's the last thing I need to do so I guess it's a good thing I'm not just been feeling depressed not all the time but frequently.

          Comment

            #6
            Mandapanda, I was 24 when I was diagnosed. I am also in the Indy area! I would be more than happy to discuss life with you, I am involved with a local foundation, we are having a Social on Friday the 13th at Fox and Hound on 82nd Street. I have, since being diagnosed, gotten married and found things in life to keep me going. My contact information is in my profile, maybe we can be MS buddies! As always, a fellow MSer will always understand things significant others cannot! And let's be honest, I can never have to many friends! Friends help point out the positives!
            Diagnosed 3/3/2010 with Multiple Sclerosis

            Comment

              #7
              Mandy - sorry to hear things are so rough right now. Being diagnosed at a young age is very difficult (a diagnosis at ANY age is difficult) and poses a very different set of challenges. I was diagnosed just about 3 1/2 years ago and I'm 23 now. Glad to see you found us here at MSWorld, this is a wonderful support network and a great place for advice, to ask questions, give answers and make friends. Seems like there is a lot overwhelming you right now and my best suggestion is to focus on one thing at a time, one day at a time. I know that is easier said than done and you have a lot on your plate. Just make sure to take care of yourself because if you don't, you won't be able to take care of anything else. Best wishes and I'm always here for support if you need it. (The NMSS in Indy is wonderful, I've been involved since I moved to the area and love it).

              Comment

                #8
                Nikki, I would like to extend the same invitation to you as I did Mandy, my wife and I have been trying to make friends who have MS just to have that support, we've made a couple local friends who have MS, not many though, I would like to invite you to our social at Fox and Hound tomorrow from 6-8pm, it is located on east 82nd street. We host a social on the 2nd Friday every month and some events throughout the year. My contact info is in my profile, I hope to hear from you!
                Diagnosed 3/3/2010 with Multiple Sclerosis

                Comment

                  #9
                  THANK YOU

                  Just now saw this. I actually got my son back recently and my ex decided to settle out of court and we are getting along a lot better now. I would love to have MS buddies! It is very hard to get others to understand what Im going through and that it is not as easy as it may look and seem. but rather hard.

                  I have alot of physical and emotional pain everyday and even though I have so much to be thankful and greatful for for some reason it seems hard. I wish I could take a retreat somewhere like Tibet lol and meditate and be peaceful. Chasing a toddler all day, arguing with my gf, and just generally feeling almost comatose due to headaches is definitely worth getting a break from! lol

                  ** Moderator's note - Post broken into paragraphs for easier reading. Many people with MS have visual difficulties that prevent them from reading large blocks of print. **

                  Comment

                    #10
                    I cannot offer a retreat to Tibet (but if you find someone who does for free let me know! lol) I can offer a local friendship with someone who knows what MS can do to you! My wife and I got married on June 19th of this year and finding people to hang out with has been difficult, as no one understands what MS does to you.

                    I find myself getting that look of "what's wrong with you" often. I remember the most upsetting confrontation I've had. I was at a Luau and was wearing my brace on my left leg, someone came up and sat down next to me, asked what I did to my leg, I told them I have MS, he goes "that sucks" and got up and walked away.

                    I try not to let negativity get me down because I know we do have a wonderful group of people for support here, and I personally have great support from my family. We also have a 17 month old that is my joy and motivation everyday!

                    Our next social is August 10th at Champps Indy Northside (Keystone at the crossing), they're going to provide soda and appetizers and have been a big supporter when it comes to our monthly happy hour socials.

                    Again, my contact info is located in my MSWorld profile

                    Sean
                    Diagnosed 3/3/2010 with Multiple Sclerosis

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Oh my gosh....

                      Lol you speak a language I know! Lo I have a 20 month old so him and your child are a close in age! That's awesome! My gf just moved here to be with me and this is a lot for her to take on too. It's not easy for her either. I know sometimes I'm emotional moody and irritated because of the problems going on in my body and I know sometimes she gets the brut of it even though she DEFINITELY isn't the one who deserves it. She's amazing. Helping me, cooking, cleaning, supporting me, helping with my child, and loving me. I feel ao lucky I wish I could make myself act like it too.

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