I've been diagnosed now for 11 years. I've honestly had it pretty good run. My only chronic issues have been eye damage, neurogenic bladder, severe left leg spacticity. I walk with a cane for balance. Other than that, I can mostly put it on the back burner. As the years go by, I have realized, like many of you, that things aren't going to get better. Last night, while talking with my husband, I realized that I am going to have to give up one of my dreams.
We adopted our son, from birth, in 2006. In 2008, my son was diagnosed with autism. 3 weeks later, I got my MS diagnosis. We always planned to adopt again, but, with what was going on with me and my son, we decided to wait. Now, my son is 13. My dream has been to adopt an older child. If I could save just one child from spending their childhood in the foster care system, I would be doing something amazing. Last night, my husband finally voiced his concerns regarding mine and my son's needs. He feels that we should abandon that plan since we don't know how my disease will progress. In my heart of hearts, I know he's right. But it makes me sad and angry that MS has taken something else away from me. I kind of feel like I no longer have a goal and a purpose. Nothing to work towards. I didn't want to leave my son without a sibling. Someday, I had hoped for grandkids. Most importantly, I wanted to be there for an older child whose chances of getting adopted are slim to none.
I am thankful for my beautiful son. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I have so many blessings, including an amazing husband. It's just hard to accept that the next stage of my life is, in a sense, already planned out for me. It wouldn't be fair to put more on my husband who already does so much for us. I have to respect is needs and concerns. We were particularly interested in adopting an LBGTQ child. We decided we are going to volunteer and help those kids in another capacity. Thanks for reading. Just felt like venting.
We adopted our son, from birth, in 2006. In 2008, my son was diagnosed with autism. 3 weeks later, I got my MS diagnosis. We always planned to adopt again, but, with what was going on with me and my son, we decided to wait. Now, my son is 13. My dream has been to adopt an older child. If I could save just one child from spending their childhood in the foster care system, I would be doing something amazing. Last night, my husband finally voiced his concerns regarding mine and my son's needs. He feels that we should abandon that plan since we don't know how my disease will progress. In my heart of hearts, I know he's right. But it makes me sad and angry that MS has taken something else away from me. I kind of feel like I no longer have a goal and a purpose. Nothing to work towards. I didn't want to leave my son without a sibling. Someday, I had hoped for grandkids. Most importantly, I wanted to be there for an older child whose chances of getting adopted are slim to none.
I am thankful for my beautiful son. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I have so many blessings, including an amazing husband. It's just hard to accept that the next stage of my life is, in a sense, already planned out for me. It wouldn't be fair to put more on my husband who already does so much for us. I have to respect is needs and concerns. We were particularly interested in adopting an LBGTQ child. We decided we are going to volunteer and help those kids in another capacity. Thanks for reading. Just felt like venting.
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