How being "Right with God looks"

[Tracy42]

Recently, I committed to strengthening my relationship and have handed my life over to God. I was called to a church, having no idea that it was a BIG church. I try to sit near the front to avoid all the stimulation behind me. I know I don't need to say, that getting there is not a seamless exercise. Yesterday, for the first time, I gave my self permission to sit and not stand and celebrate during the music. I really wanted take in the energy and not worry about standing, etc.

During the sermon, The pastor said he could tell people who were in relationship with God. What that looked like. They are people who are open, standing, hands in the air, singing. I probably was the only one sitting. Ouch! I know God and also, my body.
I had previously posted about what can we do about social fatigue...and really thought a service dog could help give me that buffer in church. Am I just being a wimpy winer, or should I send an email?

I am not sure if religion is a no no here, but here it goes.
Thank you for listening

Tracy

[frosty123]

Send

The email, hopefully it will wake up the Minister. It certainly should.

In my very humble opinion, no church should make you feel shame.

Love is the whole point of celebrating our relationship with God.

Peace.

[mjan]

Sorry for your experience. IMHO, this pastor is uneducated and insensitive. Hopefully others also brought this to his attention.

But yes, please write him or better yet, call him! Take a deep breath and tell him how that made you feel. Gosh, even the bed ridden can worship and be involved!

Let us know how it goes, hon. I am standing behind you all the way! Be blessed~

Warmly, Jan

[SNOOPY]

Hi Tracy,

If you want to put your thoughts and feelings into an e-mail then do so. You could also speak to the Pastor in person. This may very well be a learning experience for the Pastor, that's okay

Please don't let one Pastor's comments stand in the way of your journey with God

You can most definitely Worship from a seated position

[Cat Mom]

If it makes you feel better, please call the Pastor... but more importantly, God knows why you were sitting, and I know for a fact that it's ok with Him.
Jen

[KatieAgain]

Darlin', this is so wrong on so many levels. I can not tell you what to do because I just had an incident myself, but Him being a Man of God...oh....

I think you got great advice above and I just wanted you to know that I am so sorry you went through that.

[Tawanda]

You should go to my church. Half the congregation is in the same boat...! Church should be a judgement-free zone if there ever was one.

I am hoping that this was some kind of miscommunication, but I would definitely find out. Think of it as a teachable moment. You will be doing the guy a favor by confronting him and educating him about MS (the latter always a being plus for the MS Community at large). Good luck!

[REG53]

Hello Tracy,

I'm sorry you were hurt. It would hurt me really bad also. I also sit when ask to stand and so do many others. I do clap and raise my hand and my husband don't and I know he loves God.

Please do call and talk to you pastor he needs to know that not everyone can stand and it has nothing to do with being right with God or not.

Keep going and enjoying church.

[Tia1]

I would let the pastor know that you can not stand at times and remind him that God already knows and you were informing him as a curtsy.

Also, sitting in the front, you wouldn't have seen the young/old regulars that he has known for years, sitting in the back, checking their phones etc. These were probably who he was talking too.

God knows your heart and you are seeking him. Keep going! you will feel his presence. (hugs)

[Dale76]

Recently, I committed to strengthening my relationship and have handed my life over to God. I was called to a church, having no idea that it was a BIG church. I try to sit near the front to avoid all the stimulation behind me. I know I don't need to say, that getting there is not a seamless exercise. Yesterday, for the first time, I gave my self permission to sit and not stand and celebrate during the music. I really wanted take in the energy and not worry about standing, etc.

During the sermon, The pastor said he could tell people who were in relationship with God. What that looked like. They are people who are open, standing, hands in the air, singing. I probably was the only one sitting. Ouch! I know God and also, my body.
I had previously posted about what can we do about social fatigue...and really thought a service dog could help give me that buffer in church. Am I just being a wimpy winer, or should I send an email?

I am not sure if religion is a no no here, but here it goes.
Thank you for listening

Tracy

I have sat in church myself and felt all the stares I'm only 28 and still look healty but I'm far from it. You will never convince everyone and you should not stress over it. It wouldn't hurt to send him a letter regarding it since he is a pastor.

[KatW]

I think it would be helpful if you emailed him. My pastor did a sermon on just this subject. He said that he judged someone and then found out that the person was very ill. I'm sorry you had to go through this.

[Thinkimjob]

We Presbyterians don't do a lot of singing and dancing at parties, let alone in church.

I'm sure God has bigger things to worry about.

[Kimba22]

Hi Tracy,

I'm sorry the pastor's comments were hurtful. We all know he has no ability whatsoever to see who truly has a relationship with God. God is only one who can really see our hearts.

What matters most is who we worship, not how we worship. And we are also to be sincere when we worship, not hypocritical. Just because someone is "open, standing, hands in the air, singing" doesn't mean they have a true relationship with God.

You did say it was a BIG church, so it's quite possible you weren't the only one who wasn't standing. Like Tia1 mentioned, it could be he was frustrated by others he saw behind you, maybe even more than once, who were obviously distracted.

Perhaps the pastor choice of words missed the mark of what he was really trying to say? God wants all of us when we worship him, not just part of us. We are to "love him with our whole heart, with our whole soul, our whole mind, and with our whole strength." Mark 12:30.

It probably took more strength from you to get there than 99% of the congregation. You were already ahead in God's eyes before you even got there! I hope this was just a case of miscommunication and an e-mail to the pastor will help him choose his words more carefully in the future. My hope is it also opens the door for both the pastor and church to better serve you.

Good luck

[kelm10]

Teach

I know that many of us get tired of teaching others about MS/disabilities. But, who else is there to teach about our MS? All those that make comments, that hurt our daily struggle with this, do not live this and can never truly understand.

I believe that we are the best teachers to educate these people. This can include healthcare professionals, too. They don't live it, they can not truly get it. And, as we have all learned, we are all different.

I had a comment that, at first, really hurt me, from a fellow church member. I, thankfully, held my toungue, about what I first came to my mind. Then remembered that person is also entitled to their interpretation of the situation. My relationship with my God, is mine not hers.

Please contact that pastor, who is a leader. He needs to understand how that statement sounded to you and others. And, like others said, it may not have directed to you, but, others behind you.

[marti]

Sometimes I think preachers try too hard to reach too many people at once. I know I couldn't do that job. Especially since I have really lost my faith and don't know what I believe in anymore.

I find that the older I get, the more I question the things I learned along the way. You start out as a little kid being taught things are one way. Do this, don't do that. Then you get older and find out some things you were taught were just stories. Maybe it doesn't hurt to learn those stories, but when you start doubting and questioning those stories lose something.

I still believe everyone has to work it out for themselves and circumstances change things. You can't possibly be the same person you were when you were 10 and healthy and only facing growing up and being happy.

Preachers really need to learn to minister to ALL their flock. It really is an individual journey.... just like MS.