Hi all,
I'm just ending a bad weekend, well, two weeks actually and the weekend was sort of the rotten cherry on top.
Migraines, which generally start in my upper back and neck (no always, but usually), have been a part of my life for about 30 years now. Nothing has ever really worked for any length of time. And believe me, I've tried everything that ever remotely fit in my budget. All different kinds of physio, more medications than I can remember - including all the migraine medications, herbal remedies, anti-depressants, narcotics, creams and gels. All of it.
The only thing that's ever even put a dent in them, and then only with large amounts taken at the beginning, are narcotics. And now they are going to take those away too. I don't care if they can find me something that actually touches the pain, but even though I heard big promises when they finally diagnosed me a few months ago, I'm beginning to have my doubts, just based on subsequent appointments and phone conversation with folks at the MS Clinic.
Then there's the host of other MS symptoms, which I finally knew actually are the MS and not something I've been imagining all these many years. Fine. Now if only my bloody GP would recognize them instead of lecturing me about how I either don't have them or it any one of them could be the result of any number of things. Nevermind that each and every one is recurring. If I'm gonna have to be stuck with you due the doctor shortage, would you please do me the courtesy of opening your ears for once? You wanted proof and now you have it, so shut up and listen to me, okay?
About two weeks ago another migraine from hell it, and due to inadequate medication and an almost total lack of sleep for several days, it took until this Saturday to finally break. Needless to say, I'm beyond exhausted.
Anyway, this was also my birthday weekend (Friday). Neither of the kids called, dog got sick and chucked all over my room in the middle of the night, father (who lives with us) was feeling whiney and could only think about his precious wanna be girlfriend, hubby's worn-out and had a spaz when I had to get him up to help me with the dog. (Yes dear, I planned that really.) Our plans to go out got, as usual, shot to hell. Three nights in a row.
Not one single person, including hubby, remember to mention my birthday, though hubby remembered to leave a card on his pillow when he went to work that day. And, of course, I didn't hear from any of my useless brothers. But then, I never have, not unless they wanted me to do something for our parents. Then complain later about how I did it.
Found out my sister-in-law, who volunteered to take over forcing my Dad to write down a will, since the chaos of my mother's death a few years ago is something we all want to avoid - but after much talk all she did was tell him to answer the questions on the will kit. Gee thanks, never would have thought of that on my own. She was supposed to, and promised she would, sit down and go through it with him step by step. He's apparently incapable of making business phone calls or filling out paperwork without someone holding his hand, unless it happens to be something for one of the two women he keeps hoping will agree to officially date him. For them, or their kids, or grandkids, he will go out in a blizzard with nothing but a T-shirt on.
I had been trying to get my parents, for as long as I can remember, to write out a freaking will. I offered countless times to sit down and do it with them, or hook them up with a "professional" who would do it for free. (Dad is nothing, if not cheap.) When I got the MS diagnosis, I said - politely but clearly - my plate is officially full and you're not getting any younger, please get on this. And still, he's done nothing about it.
Like I said in the subject line, I'm so fed up I just want to pull my hair out. Or hit a few select family members...hard. Hubby I can forgive, he's been really, really good and has tried his best. He's not in the best of health himself anymore and how long he's going to be able to keep pulling wrenches for a living is sketchy at best. Sometimes he's 46 going on 76, having had so many injuries from war wounds, to motorcycle accidents, to engines falling on him at work. It's all catching up on him.
We are not financially eligible for any kind of assistance because we make "too much" money. Really? Our retirement disappeared in the 9/11 stock market dive and since then there's been no way to start it over again. (Yup, it even hit us Canadians.)
Someone, anyone, just shoot me. Please?
I'm just ending a bad weekend, well, two weeks actually and the weekend was sort of the rotten cherry on top.
Migraines, which generally start in my upper back and neck (no always, but usually), have been a part of my life for about 30 years now. Nothing has ever really worked for any length of time. And believe me, I've tried everything that ever remotely fit in my budget. All different kinds of physio, more medications than I can remember - including all the migraine medications, herbal remedies, anti-depressants, narcotics, creams and gels. All of it.
The only thing that's ever even put a dent in them, and then only with large amounts taken at the beginning, are narcotics. And now they are going to take those away too. I don't care if they can find me something that actually touches the pain, but even though I heard big promises when they finally diagnosed me a few months ago, I'm beginning to have my doubts, just based on subsequent appointments and phone conversation with folks at the MS Clinic.
Then there's the host of other MS symptoms, which I finally knew actually are the MS and not something I've been imagining all these many years. Fine. Now if only my bloody GP would recognize them instead of lecturing me about how I either don't have them or it any one of them could be the result of any number of things. Nevermind that each and every one is recurring. If I'm gonna have to be stuck with you due the doctor shortage, would you please do me the courtesy of opening your ears for once? You wanted proof and now you have it, so shut up and listen to me, okay?
About two weeks ago another migraine from hell it, and due to inadequate medication and an almost total lack of sleep for several days, it took until this Saturday to finally break. Needless to say, I'm beyond exhausted.
Anyway, this was also my birthday weekend (Friday). Neither of the kids called, dog got sick and chucked all over my room in the middle of the night, father (who lives with us) was feeling whiney and could only think about his precious wanna be girlfriend, hubby's worn-out and had a spaz when I had to get him up to help me with the dog. (Yes dear, I planned that really.) Our plans to go out got, as usual, shot to hell. Three nights in a row.
Not one single person, including hubby, remember to mention my birthday, though hubby remembered to leave a card on his pillow when he went to work that day. And, of course, I didn't hear from any of my useless brothers. But then, I never have, not unless they wanted me to do something for our parents. Then complain later about how I did it.
Found out my sister-in-law, who volunteered to take over forcing my Dad to write down a will, since the chaos of my mother's death a few years ago is something we all want to avoid - but after much talk all she did was tell him to answer the questions on the will kit. Gee thanks, never would have thought of that on my own. She was supposed to, and promised she would, sit down and go through it with him step by step. He's apparently incapable of making business phone calls or filling out paperwork without someone holding his hand, unless it happens to be something for one of the two women he keeps hoping will agree to officially date him. For them, or their kids, or grandkids, he will go out in a blizzard with nothing but a T-shirt on.
I had been trying to get my parents, for as long as I can remember, to write out a freaking will. I offered countless times to sit down and do it with them, or hook them up with a "professional" who would do it for free. (Dad is nothing, if not cheap.) When I got the MS diagnosis, I said - politely but clearly - my plate is officially full and you're not getting any younger, please get on this. And still, he's done nothing about it.
Like I said in the subject line, I'm so fed up I just want to pull my hair out. Or hit a few select family members...hard. Hubby I can forgive, he's been really, really good and has tried his best. He's not in the best of health himself anymore and how long he's going to be able to keep pulling wrenches for a living is sketchy at best. Sometimes he's 46 going on 76, having had so many injuries from war wounds, to motorcycle accidents, to engines falling on him at work. It's all catching up on him.
We are not financially eligible for any kind of assistance because we make "too much" money. Really? Our retirement disappeared in the 9/11 stock market dive and since then there's been no way to start it over again. (Yup, it even hit us Canadians.)
Someone, anyone, just shoot me. Please?
, not owning an intercontinental ballistic missile.
Feeling a bit better now, mostly because I managed to get one of my oh so helpful (not) brothers to take my Dad for this weekend, though he's due home tonight. But hey, at least we had a couple days to ourselves.
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