Hey All....I am worried!!!

[Buzzing-in-Utah]

Just need to share that I am at an emotional LOW. 5 months ago...had the girl...had the kids...had it all except didnt see it THEN. Fast Forward...a month ago and continuing on have a relapse...

Went to Neuro on Wed..will have tests/mri/etc tuesday. But what's the point....will still be alone...will be numb/tingling etc... Not a great date....feeling very lonely and alone. The other night mentioned to my bitter parents about "me being afraid"...what did I get after 30 years of taking care of them financially..."Grow Up and face It". Huh??

Now scared of not caring about tomorrow....thinking about things I shouldnt be thinking about!!!

2 months ago..I had hope...a month now...my sx make only remind me of what I HAVE and don't have.

Scared....alone....calculating all the wrong things in my mind!!

Best to all,
Buzzing

[Justsayyes]

Oh gee, it is tough to be in your position for sure, and all I can think of is to tell you that time changes everything. This is a low point, but things can turn around for you. Hang in there, I wanted you to know I am listening

[Thankful2B]

I'm so sorry to hear that you're feeling so low right now. Sometimes it feels like EVERYTHING is wrong. It sounds like it's been quite difficult for you not having the support you'd like from your parents, in addition to your break up.

It sounds so cliche' but it's true -Tomorrow is almost always a better day. If it's not better tomorrow, the next day will be. You are on this earth for a reason. Sometimes it helps to simply accept that you don't know what the reason is, but know that there is!

Sparky10 posted some crisis resource numbers/websites. If you don't have a friend, or a family member, or a church to turn to, please reach out to one of the resources. It certainly can't hurt you!! And, know that we are here for you. We CARE!!!

LOTS OF HUGS and PRAYERS,
T2B

[empirerecs]

Buzzin-in-Utah -

I am sorry you are feeilng this way. I posted just the other day pretty much the same thoughts. I don't have much family support either, almost all my immediate family, which really only consists of my sister, her 3 kids and my stepdad, just dropped off the face of the earth. I have an understanding BF but I think it gets to be too much for him at times, he has is own disability and I don't want to add to his stress.

I too started thinking the same things - will I be able to do anything in few years and will I be alone?

I have OCD and depression so my thought processes race like crazy and it gets hard to focus on the good things sometimes. But, I will tell you that after a few days of this I will end up feeling better. It sure doesn't feel like it when it happens, but I know it will get better for you.

If you have the ability, please try to see a therapist. It has really helped me during these horrible times. I was in-between docs but saw one for the first time yesterday and she's going to be very good so I'm hoping she will help through all this fear.

Please know you aren't alone, sort of comforting in a weird way, and if you do need immediate help call the numbers or go to the ER (I was there on MOnday).

I wish you the best.

[Sequoia]

Here are those crisis hotline numbers:

MSFriends helpline at 1-866-673-7436

National Crisis Lines
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org or 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

http://www.findcounseling.com/help/hotlines/

International Crisis Lines
http://www.befrienders.org/index.asp

http://suicidehotlines.com/international.html

[empirerecs]

Buzzin-In-Utah,

Windwalker posted this article on another thread and it's awesome. I sent it to my distant family. not sure if it will make them see the light - so to speak but it is a wonderful article.

http://www.invisibledisabilities.org...s/multiplewhat

[dpmich]

MS on it's own can sure cause Depression, let alone any meds you may be on now. You do need to go and talk with a counselor, your Dr's... someone that can help you. Stay away from those that can NOT (like nasty family situations). Good luck and we are here for you to lean on.

Debbie

[jbell2435]

Buzzing - I am so sorry you are going through this alone, it's hard enough even with a few people who care.

I am one month into my dx, and although I feel I have some support, it seems the initial concern/support is trailing off. No more calls from daughters or mom, husband doesn't even ask how the day was when I get home from work.

I don't want to bring it up all the time, so I just take it all in silence...I feel alone in this too and I am married!

Please seek some help to get you through this period. After a month, I still have good days and bad days emotionally, but the good days do happen.

Wishing you the best, and please let us know how you are doing!

Sometimes, all we need to do is to "talk", even if that is just typing in this forum, at least everyone here understands.

[foxz71]

Buzz, you are dealing with a few very emotional things all at once. You need to look at each issue separately and try to deal with it in that fashion. Grouping everything together and thinking about it all at once is overwhelming.

I went through a separation and diagnosis simultaneously. It was probably the darkest time I ever experienced in my life. I had all of the same thoughts you are having. I focused on talking those feelings out like you are doing here. I also broke the issues down to deal with individually that helped as well.

Remember; an act like suicide is final. There are no take backs. You will never experience all of the good things that your future holds for you, and though you might not see them now, they are there waiting. Always give yourself 24 hours when you start having those thoughts. Commit to make no act or decision for at least 24 hours after the thought occurs to you. Then try to consider what you might be cheating yourself out of. Call those crisis lines if you need to, they are a great source of help. Remember, lots of us have been in your shoes and pulled through, you can too.

[rickalex2]

How are you?

Just need to share that I am at an emotional LOW. 5 months ago...had the girl...had the kids...had it all except didnt see it THEN. Fast Forward...a month ago and continuing on have a relapse...

Went to Neuro on Wed..will have tests/mri/etc tuesday. But what's the point....will still be alone...will be numb/tingling etc... Not a great date....feeling very lonely and alone. The other night mentioned to my bitter parents about "me being afraid"...what did I get after 30 years of taking care of them financially..."Grow Up and face It". Huh??

Now scared of not caring about tomorrow....thinking about things I shouldnt be thinking about!!!

2 months ago..I had hope...a month now...my sx make only remind me of what I HAVE and don't have.

Scared....alone....calculating all the wrong things in my mind!!

Best to all,
Buzzing

Just checking in to see how your doing? It sounds like you were going through a really rough patch and I am praying you are doing better. Please let us know how you are doing and if there is anything we can do for you!