I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis march 2009. at that time I lost all use of my left arm, feeling in most of my body, fatigue that made it difficult to walk, confusion, forgetfulness, depression. and a host of other symptoms. I recovered most of what was effected as the lesion on my spine healed and returned to work (at a prison in florida) the end of June 2009. I found that stress had a profound impact on my mind and body. if I became aggravated, stressed or had a mild fever my old symptoms would "revisit" me.
I would get so tired it was difficult to sit up or forget how to do simple things like use the telephone. once I walked into the hall at work and had no idea where I was at, another time I had an inmate on the phone in my office talking to a judge and I looked up from my computer and had no idea who he was or where I was at. I later learned these were called Pseudo exacerbation and they could be triggered by stress. 12/03/10 I begun taking medication for depression due to thoughts of self harm. I called my doctor and got a note off for 2 weeks on 12/14/10 after an incident with the Warden scolding me. he has told my supervisor not to approve my leave because he thinks I'm throwing a temper tantrum and my illness isn't legitimate.
Meanwhile I'm fighting the fantasy of cutting my wrist and I am afraid to go back to work. All i want to do is hide from the world an his harrasment is making me worse. maybe it's time to quit work and admit i can't handle the stress of releasing convicted felons into the world. i'm so tired of trying to be strong for my family.
**post edited by Moderator to break into paragraphs for easier reading! many people with MS have visual difficulties that prevent them from reading large blocks of print**
I would get so tired it was difficult to sit up or forget how to do simple things like use the telephone. once I walked into the hall at work and had no idea where I was at, another time I had an inmate on the phone in my office talking to a judge and I looked up from my computer and had no idea who he was or where I was at. I later learned these were called Pseudo exacerbation and they could be triggered by stress. 12/03/10 I begun taking medication for depression due to thoughts of self harm. I called my doctor and got a note off for 2 weeks on 12/14/10 after an incident with the Warden scolding me. he has told my supervisor not to approve my leave because he thinks I'm throwing a temper tantrum and my illness isn't legitimate.
Meanwhile I'm fighting the fantasy of cutting my wrist and I am afraid to go back to work. All i want to do is hide from the world an his harrasment is making me worse. maybe it's time to quit work and admit i can't handle the stress of releasing convicted felons into the world. i'm so tired of trying to be strong for my family.
**post edited by Moderator to break into paragraphs for easier reading! many people with MS have visual difficulties that prevent them from reading large blocks of print**
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