When unsure about disclosure..

[quotefanatic]

Hello,

I am actually a student currently. Was reading some of the posts, and noticed many teachers consider the relevance of revealing the diagnosis to the kids.

I am not yet diagnosed, and experience symptoms daily. (seeing nuero every 6 months.) I know the poor balance issues, I've fallen off my fair share of chairs, and stumbled when there was no object in the way.

Since I'm also a student, I know how cruel kids can be. I cannot say whether or not it is right to disclose the diagnosis, but I am saying (knowing the people I do) that typically kids will leave you alone more if they realize it's something serious.

Thank you guys for all that you do!! Teens can be cruel sometimes, not only to teachers, but also to other students.

Best wishes to you all, and please don't let the kids get to you when they're joking around.

[chalknpens]

parents, not kids

My concern was not in disclosing to my students, but that their parents would not look kindly on a teacher with a diagnosis of unpredictable absences. And expecting the worst, they could begin pressuring the principal to either place their children in other classes, or move me to a different school. Parents had a lot of power in our school.

Please don't misunderstand me, I had very positive relationships with parents, but knew from observation that it happened, whenever a teacher was diagnosed with cancer, or other serious illnesses. I had never known a teacher who had MS, but the internet would lead parents to believe that teachers with MS would be absent unexpectedly and for long term.

I retired in June. I never disclosed to kids or parents.

[MSW1963]

I would have to agree, in a family of educators the preasure to perform is increasing for all parties, including teachers, parents, kids and colleagues.

My opinion is that kind of personal information may cause others to find fault when none exists; or when absences may not be the concern, but other problems exist, the teacher with MS could be an easy scapegoat. I believe it's possible in most any profession, particularly when performance and production is stressed and evaluated.

If it's unnecessary for others to know, I personally would not disclose.

[babsey2]

Your personal business is not for disclosure. It seems that once information is out, there will be horrible rumors about the effects of MS or parents will be sure that your ability as an educator is diminished, etc. I have had MS for 30+ years and have witnessed people being victimized after disclosure of MS. Simply do your job and do not worry about the unknown. You will know when, and if, to disclose. Remember that once words have left your mouth they can not be retrieved. My best wishes to you.

[Nabbosa]

Disclosing without disclosing

I've been in a couple of situations (not at work) in which I couldn't remain silent, but I didn't want to disclose what the disease was. So I just said the problem was caused by "some nerve damage". If you're concerned about the falling off the chair kind of thing, I could see that you might want to preempt any gossip about it being a problem with substance abuse.

To me, it's important to keep the MS diagnosis private, because once it gets out, you have to deal with other stuff - people not knowing what it is, but making assumptions; people turning it into other diseases; people telling you they know of a cousin's friend's dog who can cure MS; people who say stupid things about how you got it. I have enough other ways to spend my energy.

[KatieDidNOT]

Thank you guys for all that you do!! Teens can be cruel sometimes, not only to teachers, but also to other students.

Please let me add another point of view. I am not a full-time teacher, in fact, I am retired military. But, I did teach for two years at college-level.

Kids can be cruel, but they can also be extremely empathic. I use to have to sit down in a tall chair while I was lecturing or lean against the desk. This is not common, professors usually stand. I explained to the students, I was not being lazy, but I had a medical condition that would make me fall or stumble and I certainly did not want to expose my "delicates" to them, which is a word for underwear in the South. They cracked up. But what happened is this. If they saw me struggling, they got up and helped me. They offered to carry heavy things to my office. The were wonderful. I did not tell them I had MS, just a medical condition. So I disclosed without disclosing.

As far a teens, we recently had a boy at our local high school who had cancer...the boy really was not real popular, but was struggling. He of course became very frail and lost all of his hair. The local football team and all their Dads shaved their heads in support of this young man.

Kids of all ages (and adults) can be mean...but my experience is most are understanding, compassionate, and helpful.

Good luck to you.

Cheers--Katie

[CGMoonbeam]

I always had an expectations packet that I gave to students at the beginning of the semester. Included in this, I gave a brief explanation of MS and what it meant for them as members of my class. I taught juniors and seniors in high school, so they were a bit more mature. What I found was incredible helpfulness for the most part. The students understood why I was seated most of the time and why they had to come to my desk rather than my going to them. They were also concerned when I had to be out or if I wasn't feeling well. In my experience, it was truly a positive experience.

When I told one of my colleagues who trained us all in classroom management techniques, he said that it showed the students a great deal of trust, which they liked. When I got the diagnosis, I also felt that it was important that my fellow teachers and students knew what was going on if something should happen to me while teaching, MS being so unpredictable.

[roo613]

I just wanted to add my 2 cents here. I teach at a community college, and I am very up-front with my students. They are very understanding. BUT, I also share with them that despite my MS, I still get my work done. I see too many students who use every excuse in the book as to why they can't get their work done. So I share with them the struggles I face, but that I still have a responsibility to them to get papers graded, etc.

I even share with them that at the end of one semester I could hardly walk, but I couldn't get to the neuro until I finished the week. I taught my last class, went to the neuro, was put in the hospital (what I feared), and I graded finals from a hospital bed.

I guess my point is that we are a society of excuses. I want to use my story to encourage students that they can be a slave to excuses, or they can learn to overcome them.

[Temagami]

I decided that it was costing me more emotional energy to hide it than to disclose. I did disclose and now my school has a MS bike ride team for a ride in the fall. My 8th graders know that it is serious as several have drs. for parents. They can still be their ever silly selves and I like that. If I didnŽt disclose to the school, I would not have gotten an air conditioner and that would have been unbearable. I am on copaxone and hoping for the best. I missed the last term of last year, but have been fine this year. I am confident that IŽll finish this year and hope to be okay for next.

[profe]

When I got my diagnosis, I decided to wait to disclose until my disease interfered with my job. I didn't have to wait very long of course--symptoms are what sent me to a neuro in the first place. So I told my department colleagues and friends first, then sent an email to all of my colleagues at the school, then that day told my students (high school).

That first time was brutally tough (emotionally), but since then, I have told all of my classes. I generally tell them in the first week or so of school, when I'm getting all of my class rules & expectations set down.

I see the whole issue as another chance to educate--in my mind (and this is just MY perspective, I know that it's different for everyone), if I don't take the opportunity to teach these kids about it, who will? Sure, it comes up in their health class at some point, but it's not REAL. And let's be honest, this disease has a really scary name!! If you don't KNOW about it firsthand, you can 'assume' all sorts of things. So I take a few minutes--or however long it takes for the kids to ask me whatever questions they have--to teach them about what it really is and what it means to me. I've been invited to health and biology classes in my school to speak about the disease, to talk to a health professionals class in the school about doing my own injection (Avonex), and I've been interviewed for our school newspaper by a student about what it means to teach with MS. I've gotten a student the application for the Society's scholarship after he told me that his mom has MS; plus it gave him an outlet, someone to talk to every now & then who truly understood what was going on in his life.

OK, I just realized how looooonnnggg I've rambled on, so I'll 'shut up' now (and maybe even go to bed).