I will say up front my humor is somewhat dark and bit off center at times...so I don't know if this post will make it. If it does - I really hope it doesn't offend anyone. I was going through my writings and found this which I'd written earlier this year and it made me laugh. I thought I would share in case there are other's out there who might appreciate and could use a good laugh or even just a smile.
Here goes it...
“I’m a total mess’, I thought to myself as I walked across the darkened living room. The grey, overcast day outside wasn’t gloomy enough for me. It required I close the drapes, blocking even more light from my lair.
It’s a running joke that I’m a vampire. I hide during the day, often sleeping, and venture out only after dark. So is it completely insane that a good part of me wishes it were true? Well, everything but the blood sucking part.
I can’t help but wonder how great it would be to have eternal energy, strength and those nice, sharp, pointy fangs! They can be a little sexy when you smile just right. And they’d really come in handy to scare the s**t out of people when you want some alone time.
I think MS has finally reached my brain and turned me into a real nut case. I was already a little wacko before MS so thoughtfully showed up on my doorstep, confessing it’s undying commitment to share the rest of my life with me. And being infatuated with vampires and other mystical creatures of the dark and immortal isn’t anything new. But finding ‘practical applications’ for being a vampire as an optional cure for MS? That’s fairly recent and a few rungs down the crazy chain!
There are days when I fall so far out of touch with the world around me and feel like I just don’t belong with the ‘normal, healthy’ people. And after watching my fair share of vampire flicks, True Blood and, yes - I embarrassingly admit -* the virtuous teenage angst filled Twilight movies - being an outcast and venturing out only by cover of night because I’m undead and loving it sounds way more fun than because I’m miserably ill, sweating like a pig and hissing at the bright sun in all it’s energy sucking, hot flash inducing glory!
MS sucks. Vampires suck. “Hmmm...MS or Vampire? - I’ll take Vampire for 10,000, Alex!”
Yep, it’s official - I’ve most definitely fallen of my rocker! The worst part? Or maybe the best part, depending on how you look at it...I’m lovin’ it! Just like good ol’ Micky D’s!
There’s a freedom that comes with accepting one’s insanity.
Now excuse me while I remove all of my close and run naked through the house, howling under the florescent lights! No - I’m not switching gears and going all werewolf on your a**. I’m having a hot flash and need to cool off; and I always howl when I’m standing naked in florescent lighting!
Here goes it...
“I’m a total mess’, I thought to myself as I walked across the darkened living room. The grey, overcast day outside wasn’t gloomy enough for me. It required I close the drapes, blocking even more light from my lair.
It’s a running joke that I’m a vampire. I hide during the day, often sleeping, and venture out only after dark. So is it completely insane that a good part of me wishes it were true? Well, everything but the blood sucking part.
I can’t help but wonder how great it would be to have eternal energy, strength and those nice, sharp, pointy fangs! They can be a little sexy when you smile just right. And they’d really come in handy to scare the s**t out of people when you want some alone time.
I think MS has finally reached my brain and turned me into a real nut case. I was already a little wacko before MS so thoughtfully showed up on my doorstep, confessing it’s undying commitment to share the rest of my life with me. And being infatuated with vampires and other mystical creatures of the dark and immortal isn’t anything new. But finding ‘practical applications’ for being a vampire as an optional cure for MS? That’s fairly recent and a few rungs down the crazy chain!
There are days when I fall so far out of touch with the world around me and feel like I just don’t belong with the ‘normal, healthy’ people. And after watching my fair share of vampire flicks, True Blood and, yes - I embarrassingly admit -* the virtuous teenage angst filled Twilight movies - being an outcast and venturing out only by cover of night because I’m undead and loving it sounds way more fun than because I’m miserably ill, sweating like a pig and hissing at the bright sun in all it’s energy sucking, hot flash inducing glory!
MS sucks. Vampires suck. “Hmmm...MS or Vampire? - I’ll take Vampire for 10,000, Alex!”
Yep, it’s official - I’ve most definitely fallen of my rocker! The worst part? Or maybe the best part, depending on how you look at it...I’m lovin’ it! Just like good ol’ Micky D’s!
There’s a freedom that comes with accepting one’s insanity.
Now excuse me while I remove all of my close and run naked through the house, howling under the florescent lights! No - I’m not switching gears and going all werewolf on your a**. I’m having a hot flash and need to cool off; and I always howl when I’m standing naked in florescent lighting!
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