I met someone online and just last week was the five year anniversary of our first date. One day I guess we plan on getting married. But just don't know anymore.
Going into the relationship he told me that he had an auto-immune disease and what all can happen. I stuck with him, prepared to do what needs to be done.
I moved 100 miles away from family and friends to be with him.
Then last year I was given the ultimate April fool's joke that was no joke. The second opinion by an expert, said yes, you have MS.
Since then, well before just now I know why, I have been struggling with things. I am the breadwinner as he can no longer work and hasn't in over three years.
I tried going to school, before I knew, but now I am stuck with a student loan and an unfinished degree. I just can't work and attend school even if it's online. I can't concentrate and I am just plain too tired.
I am worried about my future. He can't work, luckily now he finally got on disability so he will help with a couple bills.
I am just so tired and cranky that I feel like I am starting to get resentful and hating this place where I live and maybe him. He's a pack rat and I just want to toss everything and start over basically.
I am supposed to take care of him, but who is going to take care of me?
Things are still too tight now that I have to pay back the loan, without the benefit of a better job, I will never be able to save money. That worries me.
I am not even sure why I am writing this.
I guess I am delaying taking my shot for fear of a reaction. I am too tired to go to sleep. I guess working a 46 hour week in 4 days was a mistake.
Thanks for letting me bend your ears (or eyes).
Going into the relationship he told me that he had an auto-immune disease and what all can happen. I stuck with him, prepared to do what needs to be done.
I moved 100 miles away from family and friends to be with him.
Then last year I was given the ultimate April fool's joke that was no joke. The second opinion by an expert, said yes, you have MS.
Since then, well before just now I know why, I have been struggling with things. I am the breadwinner as he can no longer work and hasn't in over three years.
I tried going to school, before I knew, but now I am stuck with a student loan and an unfinished degree. I just can't work and attend school even if it's online. I can't concentrate and I am just plain too tired.
I am worried about my future. He can't work, luckily now he finally got on disability so he will help with a couple bills.
I am just so tired and cranky that I feel like I am starting to get resentful and hating this place where I live and maybe him. He's a pack rat and I just want to toss everything and start over basically.
I am supposed to take care of him, but who is going to take care of me?
Things are still too tight now that I have to pay back the loan, without the benefit of a better job, I will never be able to save money. That worries me.
I am not even sure why I am writing this.
I guess I am delaying taking my shot for fear of a reaction. I am too tired to go to sleep. I guess working a 46 hour week in 4 days was a mistake.
Thanks for letting me bend your ears (or eyes).
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