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Just fnshed a 10-day visit from daughter and grandsons

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    Just fnshed a 10-day visit from daughter and grandsons

    I'm wondering --
    How do you manage when you have overnight, extended visit guests? This is what my experience looked like.

    Son-in-law was unable to come this time.

    Daughter flew with 1y.o. and 3y.o. We mostly had a great visit. Both kids experienced some painful canker sores and 3y.o. had some days with fever, but, overall, things still went well for us. Daughter, though, I think was somewhat overwhelmed dealing with these issues without her hubby. We helped, of course, as we were able. But grandparents aren't the same as parents. And, my ability to help with physical tasks is limited.

    Cooking for a group usually overwhelms me. Since son-in-law wasn't here, it felt more like "family" and less like "company" visiting. I usually prepare menu plans when I'm expecting overnight guests. For just us, I cook occasionally, my son cooks sometimes, and we fend for ourselves a lot. This time, instead of a specific plan, ahead of time, my son cooked up a large batch of brown rice in instant pot and I cooked 3 lbs of ground beef in crockpot. I was able to use those for multiple meals. I had lots of fresh vegetables so I added them to rice and ground beef for stir fries and soups and roasted some in oven once. We also had some frozen salmon that I cooked up once, some chicken I used, BBQ ribs for one meal, German sausage for another, scrambled eggs for a lunch, etc. We ate supper outside on the patio one evening.

    I don't eat gluten or dairy. We did have gluten products in the house for others (some cereal, bread with sprouted flour, crackers, etc). We managed without dairy. We had several kinds of non-dairy milk (oatmeal milk and rice milk); the boys loved the rice milk. They usually have a lot of cheese and yogurt at their house, but got by without it here.

    Others pitched in with meals, especially if I did the planning and got things started and half-done. Son (young adult son who still lives at home) helped occasionally, daughter helped sometimes and hubby helped too. Others did all the clean up.

    We had some occasions when we ate out too, so those were meals when I didn't need to cook. Several of those occasions included some music with lunch or dinner (one at a fundraiser at a cool local pizza place, the other was a blue grass band at a local health food deli and market). Both were pretty casual, relaxed atmospheres and worked well with young children.

    Additional activities included a trip to the play area at the library, borrowing balls at the rec center to play in the gym, a space museum with a cool gift shop, a play date with the next door neighbor kids and their mom, multiple occasions to get together with extended family, reading lots of books at home, hugs and snuggles, singing little kid songs together, playing with toys in the play room, celebrating grandson and daughter's November birthdays a little early, a campfire one evening in our outdoor fireplace, attending church and Sunday School on Sunday morning and the Church Family Night meal on Wednesday, etc. We have both a back yard playground and an indoor play room. Both were well-used.

    The 3y.o. was fun and charming as usual. The 1y.o. (almost 2) had incredibly blossoming language skills. We ran out of time and didn't get a chance to go to the pool at the Y, which we often do when they visit.

    They left on an early flight yesterday morning and are home in Manitoba, Canada again. The 3y.o. is old enough to experience the ambivalence that often accompanies the end of a good trip -- the readiness to return home and get back to a routine, but the sadness of the end of a good time. He understood that goodbyes meant that we wouldn't see each other for awhile.

    Their family is working on obtaining permanent residency (a green card) for our Canadian son-in-law so they can move back to our community in Kansas. They are about a third of the way through the expected 18-month process. We'll help them move at the end of that (maybe by the end of 2020?), and likely see them once or twice before that, in addition to our weekly Skypes or face time calls.
    Last edited by Mamabug; 10-28-2019, 01:00 PM.
    ~ Faith
    MSWorld Volunteer -- Moderator since JUN2012
    (now a Mimibug)

    Symptoms began in JAN02
    - Dx with RRMS in OCT03, following 21 months of limbo, ruling out lots of other dx, and some "probable stroke" and "probable CNS" dx for awhile.
    - In 2008, I was back in limbo briefly, then re-dx w/ MS: JUL08
    .

    - Betaseron NOV03-AUG08; Copaxone20 SEPT08-APR15; Copaxone40 APR15-present
    - Began receiving SSDI / LTD NOV08. Not employed. I volunteer in my church and community.

    #2
    Mamabug ~

    Looks like things went smooth, and you did very well with the family visit.

    Great to know that! Thanks for sharing!

    Take Care
    PPMS for 26 years (dx 1998)
    ~ Worrying will not take away tomorrow's troubles ~ But it will take away today's peace. ~

    Comment


      #3
      Originally posted by Mamabug View Post
      I'm wondering --
      How do you manage when you have overnight, extended visit guests? This is what my experience looked like.
      Yes, sounds like you managed pre-ahead planning and had lots of help!

      This past summer I had both long distance sons, dils and 2 granddaughters for a week, then one son and family for a 6 week stay (they live in So. America).

      I made lots of frozen dinners and did some meal planning ahead of time with many BBQ's which DH was in charge of. All pitched in to help with cleanup, but I was still exhausted after all had left! Had lots of fun times, but it took me weeks to recuperate. I think a lot of energy spent when you have company for any length of time and how much you love and enjoy them takes a toll on mental reserves.

      I did plan on some alone times which helped and everyone understood - except my granddaughters Too young yet to get it.

      Glad you had a fun family time, Mamabug!
      1st sx '89 Dx '99 w/RRMS - SP since 2010
      Administrator Message Boards/Moderator

      Comment


        #4
        My hat's off to you Mamabug. You certainly had a great visit.
        God Bless Us All

        Comment


          #5
          Ten days???? No way. I can barely get through a couple of hours before I start twitching. I try to plan out everything, but the kids don't expect as much from me anymore. Glad you had a nice visit. You amaze me!
          Marti




          The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.

          Comment


            #6
            Sounds like it was a wonderful visit. And kudos to the kiddos thats a lot of adjusting and new experiences for wee ones to handle. I'm sure you are looking forward to when they move back to the area.
            He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.
            Anonymous

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by marti View Post
              Ten days???? No way. I can barely get through a couple of hours before I start twitching. I try to plan out everything, but the kids don't expect as much from me anymore. Glad you had a nice visit. You amaze me!
              I'm not so amazing. I was just the grandparent. It was my daughter who was in charge of watching them, caring for.them putting them to bed, etc. ❤. I was the one whose main job was to have fun and spoil them.
              ~ Faith
              MSWorld Volunteer -- Moderator since JUN2012
              (now a Mimibug)

              Symptoms began in JAN02
              - Dx with RRMS in OCT03, following 21 months of limbo, ruling out lots of other dx, and some "probable stroke" and "probable CNS" dx for awhile.
              - In 2008, I was back in limbo briefly, then re-dx w/ MS: JUL08
              .

              - Betaseron NOV03-AUG08; Copaxone20 SEPT08-APR15; Copaxone40 APR15-present
              - Began receiving SSDI / LTD NOV08. Not employed. I volunteer in my church and community.

              Comment


                #8
                Seasha -- I've thought about cooking ahead. But, mostly, I have trouble keeping up; not much energy to work ahead. I'm impressed!
                ~ Faith
                MSWorld Volunteer -- Moderator since JUN2012
                (now a Mimibug)

                Symptoms began in JAN02
                - Dx with RRMS in OCT03, following 21 months of limbo, ruling out lots of other dx, and some "probable stroke" and "probable CNS" dx for awhile.
                - In 2008, I was back in limbo briefly, then re-dx w/ MS: JUL08
                .

                - Betaseron NOV03-AUG08; Copaxone20 SEPT08-APR15; Copaxone40 APR15-present
                - Began receiving SSDI / LTD NOV08. Not employed. I volunteer in my church and community.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by Jules A View Post
                  Sounds like it was a wonderful visit. And kudos to the kiddos thats a lot of adjusting and new experiences for wee ones to handle. I'm sure you are looking forward to when they move back to the area.
                  Yes! ......
                  ~ Faith
                  MSWorld Volunteer -- Moderator since JUN2012
                  (now a Mimibug)

                  Symptoms began in JAN02
                  - Dx with RRMS in OCT03, following 21 months of limbo, ruling out lots of other dx, and some "probable stroke" and "probable CNS" dx for awhile.
                  - In 2008, I was back in limbo briefly, then re-dx w/ MS: JUL08
                  .

                  - Betaseron NOV03-AUG08; Copaxone20 SEPT08-APR15; Copaxone40 APR15-present
                  - Began receiving SSDI / LTD NOV08. Not employed. I volunteer in my church and community.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by REG53 View Post
                    My hat's off to you Mamabug. You certainly had a great visit.
                    Thanks. Yes, it was awesome. I love those two little guys to pieces.
                    ~ Faith
                    MSWorld Volunteer -- Moderator since JUN2012
                    (now a Mimibug)

                    Symptoms began in JAN02
                    - Dx with RRMS in OCT03, following 21 months of limbo, ruling out lots of other dx, and some "probable stroke" and "probable CNS" dx for awhile.
                    - In 2008, I was back in limbo briefly, then re-dx w/ MS: JUL08
                    .

                    - Betaseron NOV03-AUG08; Copaxone20 SEPT08-APR15; Copaxone40 APR15-present
                    - Began receiving SSDI / LTD NOV08. Not employed. I volunteer in my church and community.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Originally posted by Mamabug View Post
                      I'm not so amazing. I was just the grandparent. It was my daughter who was in charge of watching them, caring for.them putting them to bed, etc. ❤. I was the one whose main job was to have fun and spoil them.
                      This! The joys and beauty of grandparenting.
                      1st sx '89 Dx '99 w/RRMS - SP since 2010
                      Administrator Message Boards/Moderator

                      Comment


                        #12
                        So glad you had such a wonderful visit and that you did get to do all the spoiling you were up for.

                        I think sometimes we worry about so many things when we get company and forget, they are really coming to spend time with us and don't really care that much on our hosting abilities. So glad everyone chipped in so you could have the energy to enjoy your company.

                        Lots of luck too on getting thru the green card process. You must really be looking forward to having them closer.
                        Kathy
                        DX 01/06, currently on Tysabri

                        Comment

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