Would you?

[SNOOPY]

Carolinemf, I don't how the use of a Handicap Placard or Plate is determined to be needed in Australia. In the States we can go on our Department Of Motor Vehicle(DMV) Website and search for qualifications. I meet the needed qualification (walking distance) when I was diagnosed and since then the DMV added in Neurological conditions.

In Colorado we are allowed 2 placards or 1 placard or 1 Placard and License plate. I have the Handicap plate on my car and the Placard in our other vehicle.

I have numerous stories of being confronted by general people who thought I should not be parking I HC parking.

I had pulled into a parking lot and before I could even get out of my car a customer had gone in and told the store manager I was parked illegally in HC. The store manager came out and I pointed out my plate, she looked, said nothing and went back in the store

I was parked in HC parking picking up my daughter from school. A parent went in and told the assistant principal who came out and told me I had to move because she called the police...I said okay (after pointing out my HC plate) and stayed parked were I was. The police looked as the drove by and kept going.

Shortly after I was diagnosed and had received the Placard and still dealing with an exacerbation I parked in HC parking. I had not gotten more than a few steps away from my vehicle and this man walks up to me, got right in my face and started yelling that there are people that really need HC parking and I should be ashamed of myself and move my car. I tried to calmly explain I had Multiple Sclerosis and I have a HC Placard. His response ~ you look fine and better move your car. Good grief!

Carolinemf, large or small town you could run into nosy or rude people, it happens. But, I believe your health is more important than what people may think or say. You definitely don't have to explain if you so choose. I have never found explaining helpful

I am very opinionate on this topic as I have taken a lot of crap from people from a young age. Please talk to your Neurologist

[Mamabug]

Mamabug 20.000 is a large town here

Although we are the largest community in our county, my state of Kansas has more than 20 towns larger than mine; 5 of them have more than 100,000.

[Carolinemf]

Thank you snoopy for your heartfelt reply.

Why are there always jackasses to deal with that make things harder for others.?

Maybe i'm just being a coward.

[robert152]

Our neighbor who is a police officer advised my wife to get the placard and only display it when it is needed. He felt the plates advertised a soft target for thieves.

[kittysmith]

Not sure.

I've had the paperwork for a handicapped placard for years. I just can't bring myself to fill it out. I have leg spacticity, so sometimes I have to use a cane. Most of the time, I'm just dog tired after a trip to Wally World or the mall. I feel fine when I start, but feel like I've been run over by an elephant when I'm ready to leave. My husband wants me to get one. My main concern is people telling me I don't need to park in a handicapped spot. I hate confrontation. I don't want to have to explain myself.

[SNOOPY]

I don't want to have to explain myself.

You do not need to explain yourself nor does it need to be confrontational. You can ignore what people say and you do not even need to respond, just keep moving in the direction you need to go.

Why worry about a stranger opening their mouth to make an ignorant comment and showing they are simply judgmental without prior knowledge of a person's health? If someone is concerned the HC Placard/plate is being used illegally they have the option to call the police...there is a hefty fine for parking in HC parking illegally.

There have been many times through the years where I had shopping or other things to do and if not for a closer parking space I would not have been able to make it to my car. Even with HC parking there were times getting to my car has been questionable.

[MermaidOP]

Dear kittysmith,
You sound like me. GET YOUR PLACARD! You are entitled to the support a close parking place will provide. I've had mine for a few years now and use it. It wasn't until I got the placard that I realized how often I was just not going to places like stores and restaurants as much as I wanted and needed.

Shopping is still an exhausting task, and I might need a lot of help from DH to get into the car at the end, but it is better. I use my walker at some stores (Barnes & Noble, Macy's, boutiques, REI) where I might sit for a few minutes to look and select. Other places I just hang onto a cart. I'll go to a large grocery or craft store, but I'm not brave enough for a big box store. For restaurants, I use my cane.

Don't worry about what others' think or even say. The world is full of negativity. I try not to enable it by giving it power over me.

Stay lifted,
Mermaid Susan

[Carolinemf]

Kittysmith,
Yeah - just have this inkling that it may add stress.
Used to thrive on confrontation now i avoid it a all costs.

it also feels a bit like.... i'm giving in .. maybe...
been fighting for years , now over the last few i have told my family and close friends and now i'm considering announcing to all and sundry that i'm disabled

This would make some things easier so i am considering. And i intend to discuss with doc in May. but still trying to get my head around decision.

sounds like you are in a similar place

[Mamabug]

Kittysmith,
Yeah - just have this inkling that it may add stress.
Used to thrive on confrontation now i avoid it a all costs.

it also feels a bit like.... i'm giving in .. maybe...
been fighting for years , now over the last few i have told my family and close friends and now i'm considering announcing to all and sundry that i'm disabled

This would make some things easier so i am considering. And i intend to discuss with doc in May. but still trying to get my head around decision.

sounds like you are in a similar place

It could decrease stress, rather than add it. It sounds like telling family and friends was a difficult decision. But, now that your disability is "out", the stress of hiding it is gone. Hiding it from your nosy community is likely also stressful.

I was a little bit reluctant, 15 months ago, to begin using a cane when I leave the house. Although most people knew about my MS, it still felt like an "announcement" that it is progressing. And I can still get by without out it, ... so, even though it helps me, maybe I don't need to?

But once I made the decision, I've never regretted it. People (friends, acquaintances, strangers) are more courteous. They let me go first, they open doors, etc. Sometimes, others benefit from a visible cue to remind them of our challenges. Give your community the benefit of a doubt; they might be less judgemental than you anticipate.

[flangehead]

By all means get the placard. There is no reason to suffer any more than necessary due to heat or the need to walk an uncomfortable distance. Here in central TX the heat can be brutal so I have no qualms about using mine. We also have 2 vehicles so the 'portability' of the placards is important to us. One more thing to consider, albeit possibly a little selfish, but what other advantage do we get for carrying this "wonderful" disease around with us?

[Mamabug]

One more thing to consider, albeit possibly a little selfish, but what other advantage do we get for carrying this "wonderful" disease around with us?

Not selfish at all. I agree; I'd trade my placard in a minute to be healthy again. It's just one "perk" surrounded by a mountain of inconveniences.

[Cat Mom]

I urge you to get your well-deserved placard and/or plate, it's a real God-send. Mine is a passenger plate as I don't drive but I am ambulatory (sometimes use a cane). We don't use it a lot, I can be picked up/dropped off at the door but there are times I'm so thankful to have it. At huge parking lots like an amusement park it gets used, I live in an urban area of a large city with lots of shopping malls. Because of the over-heating that I end up having by the time shopping is done we sometimes use it then, mostly Christmas shopping.

Please don't give a hoot about anybody that's so mean as to question you, I've had my share and most of the time I just ignore the person and continue on, they are the kind of people who are angry all the time and just using anybody to take that anger out on is disgusting. Please get yourself set up, reserve any and all energy you'll save in parking lots and use it to do something pleasurable for yourself... you're worth it!

Jen

[palmtree]

I agree you absolutely deserve a placard. Let the jerks fume. You can’t do anything about their ignorance.

You also brought up another important subject. Why do these shopping center parking lots have no shade? They plant a few trees and then trim them down to twigs. Wherever there is a speck of shade someone has hogged the space.

Climate change has already made it extremely dangerous for anyone to get into a car that has been in the sun with the windows sealed shut. Those of us with MS shouldn’t even be walking out in the blazing sun on hot asphalt.

[Seasha]

My son thinks i should get a disabled sticker so i can park in the disabled parking areas

It's been a couple weeks now since you posted, Caroline. Did you end up getting one??

And palmtree - I agree about the lack of trees in parking lots. It's almost criminal as temps are rising everywhere!

[Cat Mom]

Forgot a funny story with regard to my handicapped passenger permit. This happened approx 10 years ago when my MS was at it's worst. It was living in my husband's vehicle window and one day I noticed it wasn't anywhere. He reminded me of "the big car wash incident" where the driver's side window opened up with water spewing everywhere. He and my step son grabbed all the wet paper, threw it away with everything else that got ruined. We just assumed it was thrown away.

In order to get a replacement I had to file a report at the police station then take the report to the MTO and get a new permit... done!

Around 8 months later I get a call from the police saying they caught the guy on an unrelated theft and he had my permit!! Long story short I had to go to court (with 7 more people who also were a victim to this guy). They said they wanted me there for the "disgust factor", the fact that he stole a handicapped permit made him even more horrible. I was using my cane full-time then. Everyone else had laptops and expensive things stolen. I was nervous to go to court as my permit has my name and address on it and I didn't want any of his "homies" causing trouble.

Now we keep it in the glove compartment not on the window for people to steal. Just when you think you've seen the worst something like this happens and raises the bar of disgust significantly higher.

Jen