Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Anxiety (again)

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    #16
    Thx

    Originally posted by MyGirlsMom View Post
    This is such a good thread and I appreciate all the comments and personal insight that everyone has shared.

    This disease is hard to manage and for me it seems that fear and anxiety have various Seasons in my life with MS.

    Ant, With your DX and flare, this is a really tough time. But please know that it does both mentally and physically get better....all of it will but it will take time. It is unfortunate that each person is different and the time line isnt exact but varied and unpredictable.

    My dx was in 2009, although I have had MS since the early 1990s. For those first 3 years at DX I really struggled with ongoing symptoms and flares, working in a job outside the home and managing two young children. Now I seem to hardly remember those days, but I know some were quite long. If I had to do that again now, I am not sure that I could....I just didn’t think about it, I just did it in sort of a survival mode I think. Crazy!!

    Then I went through a period where I did have some symptoms but they didn’t impact my life so significantly and I was able to push them aside and just live. I would say that that has been the past 5 years...I am so very grateful for that time period where MS didn’t consume all aspects my life.

    Of course, this past month I got hit with a flare that was probably the biggest since I was diagnosed resulting in IVSM and prednisone, which I have never experienced before. Well, my positive “can do” attitude just got an huge adjustment. I felt kicked to the curb. So much for feeling like the strong positive woman I pretend to be. Now I feel like I have regressed going back to that familiar place of anxiety and fear.

    Please know that while I share this with all of you, people on the outside, at work or kids school, see the “smiling me” that minimizes my leg, walking and weakness issues, as I truck around with my cane in tow as if nothing was unsual and there really wasn’t a cane there or walking issues at all. LOL!

    During these past 3 weeks, I have had some pretty good pity parties in the middle of the night when I am unable to sleep. I don’t think my daughters really remember me being this bad, so this recent flare has caused them some concern too. They are teens focused on school and their lives and trying to figure out what is going on with Mom. They have grown into strong and compassionate girls...and I am sure my MS issues over the years have given them that gift.

    That all said and for the most part I still am positive and hopeful....for me and for all of us. We can each only take each day we are given and do the best we can. I take heart that each of you here on the Board are doing the same...staying the course during goods times and bad.

    I am feeling so grateful for this network of MSers lifting each other up during times of darkness. Thank you for helping me to not feel so alone over the past couple of weeks. I hope that my story will help someone else know and believe that the dark times do and will get better. Hugs to you all!!
    Thank you MGM, actually right not my dx flare episode is fading away, the sx are all but gone but a few minor tingling/numbness remain still. I'm back to a full active life again... running, biking, weightlifting all that stuff I loved to do. I am happy and grateful that I recovered so well but my anxiety lies with the thought of "how long will it last feeling this good"? This is where I trust In tecfidera to keep me relapse free but the anxiety is not as bad anymore but still creeps up on me from time to time.

    I just want to live my life and so far so good. I see my neuro in June and have an MRI in Aug which will be a big event seeing where my MS is and hopefully get a better idea and a good prognosis.

    for now I can just live my life and take care of myself and stay positive

    Comment

    Working...
    X