Employees with MS Being Bullied

[Marco]

** People acting like monsters **

Multiple sclerosis sufferers face “disturbing” levels of workplace bullying and mistreatment, a survey by the MS Society has found.

Almost one in four respondents say their employer has treated them badly as a result of their condition, and a fifth said say their work colleagues have done so.


Complete story here:

https://inews.co.uk/essentials/news/...ociety-survey/

[Tawanda]

Due to M.S., I am unable to work outside the home, but if I was, I would not disclose my M.S. If I needed assistive devices, I would get creative and come up with a much more benign explanation. Lying is not my thing at all, but getting a paycheck and supporting my family would take precedent. Sadly, my friends and family don't grasp the scope of this disease, so what is to stop that occasional back-stabbing co-worker or middle manager from being held to an even higher standard than those who actually love me?

[sardi_g]

I was mistreated and asked to leave by an employer at NMSS of all places. Just bc they work there doesn't mean they have any interest in bettering the lives of ms'ers. It's just a paycheck to many. I wish I had had the guts to pursue a case. They had me working through a temp agency instead of directly for them. I was working in a room with a wall of windows and no ac vent and my arms starting tremoring. I asked to be moved but was denied.

The worst comment made: "There's someone else here with MS and they don't seem to have any problems".

Never tolerate that again.

[Tawanda]

I was mistreated and asked to leave by an employer at NMSS of all places.

😮!!! This just further illustrates why I feel so strongly about keeping our health issues to ourselves at work. One of the first life lessons I learned is that life isn't fair. That stinks what happened to you, sardi g!!

[Jules A]

Sadly, my friends and family don't grasp the scope of this disease, so what is to stop that occasional back-stabbing co-worker or middle manager from being held to an even higher standard than those who actually love me?

I think this is the reality of it. People don't understand and realistically how inconvenienced should we expect co-workers be for us? If we need modifications and are able to do our job with reasonable accommodations if the employer meets ADA criteria I would recommend filing. That doesn't mean people are required or going to be neighborly about it. Hopefully they employer would do their best to ensure other employees aren't burdened by the accommodations but I don't know if that is always the case.

In a way although I'd never be mean spirited about it on some level I can understand. As someone who never had children the amount of extra work I have been burdened with because coworkers over the years have had to take time off for maternity leave and then a sick child, even though a legitimate need, is frustrating. I don't know about other's workplaces but mine have always been staffed so that we need every single person and attempting a replacement especially on short notice rarely happens so the work gets turfed off on coworkers who already have their own heavy load. Although I'm supportive and helpful on the outside, underneath I feel it is annoying that I should have to take on additional work for someone who isn't able to pull their fair share of the load.

I have been fortunate not to have needed accommodations yet and the plan is to retire if/when that time comes. Did I say life is unfair? And even more so with MS.

[pennstater]

I was mostly fortunate, but know that is not the case with most. People knew, but I think I worked harder and put more hours in to make sure no one could question my ability..

I later had accommodations, but coworkers were ok, as I still met my objectives and didn't interfere with their ability to meet theirs. Most of them respected me for my effort.

Once that my additional accomodations started to interfere with our team meeting our client's needs, as Jules said, time to go.

And Jukes, definitely understand about the no children aspect. That was me as well. Most companies are bare bones anymore and coworkers are just expected to pick up the slack.

[Jules A]

I was mostly fortunate, but know that is not the case with most. People knew, but I think I worked harder and put more hours in to make sure no one could question my ability..

I later had accommodations, but coworkers were ok, as I still met my objectives and didn't interfere with their ability to meet theirs. Most of them respected me for my effort.

Once that my additional accomodations started to interfere with our team meeting our client's needs, as Jules said, time to go.

And Jukes, definitely understand about the no children aspect. That was me as well. Most companies are bare bones anymore and coworkers are just expected to pick up the slack.

You sound like a thoughtful coworker no doubt your team members respected and enjoyed working with you.

[pennstater]

You sound like a thoughtful coworker no doubt your team members respected and enjoyed working with you.

Thanks Jules!

[4boysmom]

I feel sorry for those who have trouble with their workplace!

I am a fairly outspoken and outgoing employee. I always have been and always will be. I also share more of myself than most, so everyone around me knows I have MS. My co-workers go out of their way to startle me, because it makes us all laugh when just standing behind me can get me to jump. They laugh with me as I wobble back and forth when trying to stand for any length of time.

But I think a lot of the key is, I laugh "with" them! They respect me too much to laugh "at" me. They made sure I have the best parking spot. They make sure and grab doors for me. They now carry most things for me because I have been known to drop such things as cookies and papers. My boss allows me to take an extra half hour at lunch so I can go to a pool with a class that helps me move better.

Maybe I am treated well because I have always done what I could and more. I did this for years, and now that I am slowing down a ton, they are willing to give me the benefit of the doubt. I am lucky indeed to be surrounded by awesome co-workers. I was a school teacher for 17 years, then got hired in the technology department to run the curriculum software and train teachers on how to use it. I have done that for the past 12 years. It was a blessing from God that I was moved to this position, because when I help in classrooms, I'm only good for a few hours. But I can do much from my office and computer. So I don't think in all circumstances it is bad to let your employer know of your MS.

[palmtree]

I was mistreated and asked to leave by an employer at NMSS of all places. Just bc they work there doesn't mean they have any interest in bettering the lives of ms'ers. It's just a paycheck to many. I wish I had had the guts to pursue a case. They had me working through a temp agency instead of directly for them. I was working in a room with a wall of windows and no ac vent and my arms starting tremoring. I asked to be moved but was denied.

The worst comment made: "There's someone else here with MS and they don't seem to have any problems".

Never tolerate that again.

Has the statute of limitations lapsed for filing a lawsuit? We can't let these things slide.

[Tawanda]

I feel sorry for those who have trouble with their workplace!

I am a fairly outspoken and outgoing employee. I always have been and always will be. I also share more of myself than most, so everyone around me knows I have MS. My co-workers go out of their way to startle me, because it makes us all laugh when just standing behind me can get me to jump. They laugh with me as I wobble back and forth when trying to stand for any length of time.

But I think a lot of the key is, I laugh "with" them! They respect me too much to laugh "at" me. They made sure I have the best parking spot. They make sure and grab doors for me. They now carry most things for me because I have been known to drop such things as cookies and papers. My boss allows me to take an extra half hour at lunch so I can go to a pool with a class that helps me move better.

Maybe I am treated well because I have always done what I could and more. I did this for years, and now that I am slowing down a ton, they are willing to give me the benefit of the doubt. I am lucky indeed to be surrounded by awesome co-workers. I was a school teacher for 17 years, then got hired in the technology department to run the curriculum software and train teachers on how to use it. I have done that for the past 12 years. It was a blessing from God that I was moved to this position, because when I help in classrooms, I'm only good for a few hours. But I can do much from my office and computer. So I don't think in all circumstances it is bad to let your employer know of your MS.

I don't doubt there are decent work places out there. I think it is a total crapshoot though. When I was first diagnosed I felt like I had to "confess" my condition to every Tom, Dick and Harry or I was a liar or something! The reactions that people have to MS are so varied...older people think "Richard Pryor" or are you one of "Jerry's Kids?". Younger people think there have been such "enormous" strides in MS treatment that your life is like that actress in the Tecfidera commercial or you have that same thing that "Dancing With The Stars" runner-up Jack Osbourn has-no big deal. Still, many people don't even know what MS is!

Work environments vary, and I am glad when I hear about an MSer that not only still works, but is not descriminated against. Of course, employees turn over, work environments change, and what may not be a problem now may turn into one later. I would approach disclosing ANY personal health issue with caution, especially if you are not in a union.

[Tawanda]

Has the statute of limitations lapsed for filing a lawsuit? We can't let these things slide.

The party to sue would be the temp agency. They are the employer of record, and yes, they can be (and are) sued.

[sardi_g]

Lawsuits are scary. I had volunteered for a year at the local chapter which was right next to National. The people there were so nice. Someone suggested contacting eeoc (sp?)but it seemed like it would take a lot of strength and resolve. And I didn't want to put anyone from local on the spot. A few months later they slimmed down the employees at local due to budget concerns. I would have dreaded being a factor in anyone's work situation. I would have appreciated an apology from National and some effort to talk to the employer about what NOT to say to someone in my position - ie "someone else with MS works here and doesn't have a problem". If someone works at the MS society and doesn't know the nature of MS and how varied it's manifested, that is definitely the fault of said employer's employer. It seems like it should be a requirement that they have a working understanding of MS.

It's selfish to take the easy route and just leave quietly - for any ms'er coming after me. But that's what I did. I moved to a cooler climate bc the summers were truly debilitating.

I quit the society it was hard to even see the acronym but I rejoined this year bc that only hurt myself and I'm a bit wiser and if this telling this story helps anyone I'd feel a lot better. Having a mood disorder added a shame factor that made it all intimidating although I'm working on that so that I stop 'hiding' from the world. I appreciate the support of this forum and I am sorry I chose not to do anything. Okay now I'm just rambling so I'll stop. :-)

[jlk9498]

I feel sorry for those who have trouble with their workplace!

I am a fairly outspoken and outgoing employee. I always have been and always will be. I also share more of myself than most, so everyone around me knows I have MS. My co-workers go out of their way to startle me, because it makes us all laugh when just standing behind me can get me to jump. They laugh with me as I wobble back and forth when trying to stand for any length of time.

But I think a lot of the key is, I laugh "with" them! They respect me too much to laugh "at" me. They made sure I have the best parking spot. They make sure and grab doors for me. They now carry most things for me because I have been known to drop such things as cookies and papers. My boss allows me to take an extra half hour at lunch so I can go to a pool with a class that helps me move better.

Maybe I am treated well because I have always done what I could and more. I did this for years, and now that I am slowing down a ton, they are willing to give me the benefit of the doubt. I am lucky indeed to be surrounded by awesome co-workers. I was a school teacher for 17 years, then got hired in the technology department to run the curriculum software and train teachers on how to use it. I have done that for the past 12 years. It was a blessing from God that I was moved to this position, because when I help in classrooms, I'm only good for a few hours. But I can do much from my office and computer. So I don't think in all circumstances it is bad to let your employer know of your MS.

??? Is being jumpy and easily startled a symptom of MS??? I am consently jumping and screaming when I am "shocked" or startled. I thought it was just me being stupid.....is it MS???

[ClearBlueSky]

??? Is being jumpy and easily startled a symptom of MS??? I am consently jumping and screaming when I am "shocked" or startled. I thought it was just me being stupid.....is it MS???

I think so. I know I'm easily startled. It's one of the reasons I stopped driving.