Sad - could do with a boost.

[Thinkimjob]

I keep starting this post, then I stop. Truly don't want to depress people.
Nineteen years of MS. Went to the super-not-so-dooper market yesterday, and that was it. No more. It's over. I will never shop again, unless there's a miracle.

Bless 'em, three people, all strangers, two women, one man, actually volunteered to do my shopping and my cleaning for me, as I staggered about the aisles.

"I feel so sorry for you," said one. "Here is my phone number. You ring, and I'll do whatever you need."

So kind, and I'm so crippled.

I wanted to cry. Waited until I got home and sobbed my heart out.

Also, employment ends in August. I don't know what
I'm going to do. I have tried so hard for so long.

I'm not venting. I'm telling my truth.

[Karenkay]

I have nothing to say except I understand. I have lost so much to MS too.

[palmtree]

You tell it like it is. That is so valuable.

You could write a book. It would not be some sappy self help book with the "answers" it would be about you. I bet anyone who reads it would want to know how the story ends. They might even want to learn more about MS.

A lot of people with MS have written books. Not to diminish their accomplishment but most of them have a special diet or it is a novel on optimism and "having the right attitude". No one has had the courage to tell the truth. There is a void that leaves people with MS and their loved ones with unrealistic expectations of MS patients.

Even if you just published your posts on MS World, it would tell the world so much.

In the meantime, crying is good. Let the tears come down. 💧💦

[Jules A]

I don't have any wise words but wanted to say I'm sorry things are so difficult. This disease is horrible.

[pennstater]

I also have no words of wisdom. My heart goes out to you. I know how hard you fight each day. Let yourself cry, it can be healing sometimes and sometimes we just need to let it out.

Enjoy some tea or a glass of wine and do something just for you, whether listen to favorite music, read a good book, or journal, etc...

I do remember someone before saying thank God for the kindness of strangers. I am sure it is with mixed emotions.

I hope you catch a break. Also agree with palmtree, I think you would write an awesome book and educate a lot of us, including medical professionals!

[Tawanda]

I know you are telling your truth. My own truth is not peaches and cream either. This disease is a thief that can't be locked up so it just continues to steal and steal and steal from us! At least there are some kind, helpful people where you live. People around here aren't so nice! If someone offered help, I would wonder what they want from me!

Not much to offer you but the deep understanding that only another person experiencing MS firsthand can truly share. My email address is on my profile if you want to "vent" with me. I just can't hate this disease enough!!

[Tia1]

I'm so sorry! I will not minimize the struggles that you are going through, however, I want to remind you (and me) that the sun usually comes out after the worse storms. Hold on!! I'm praying for you!

[loopey]

Thank You For Finishing YOur Post

Thank you so much for finishing your post. It is so important for me to know crying and feeling bad are things shared by so many of us with this awful disease. I do appreciate uplifting posts but when I am feeling terrible posts like yours make me feel OK about not feeling OK.

[palmtree]

I'm so sorry! I will not minimize the struggles that you are going through, however, I want to remind you (and me) that the sun usually comes out after the worse storms. Hold on!! I'm praying for you!

It always darkest before the dawn. It's happened to me so I believe it.

[REG53]

I am so sorry. It can be tough for someone to tell you they feel sorry for you but please don't give up, keep doing what you can.

I hope you are feeling better after having a good cry.

[jeannef1]

I keep starting this post, then I stop. Truly don't want to depress people.
Nineteen years of MS. Went to the super-not-so-dooper market yesterday, and that was it. No more. It's over. I will never shop again, unless there's a miracle.

Bless 'em, three people, all strangers, two women, one man, actually volunteered to do my shopping and my cleaning for me, as I staggered about the aisles.

"I feel so sorry for you," said one. "Here is my phone number. You ring, and I'll do whatever you need."

So kind, and I'm so crippled.

I wanted to cry. Waited until I got home and sobbed my heart out.

Also, employment ends in August. I don't know what
I'm going to do. I have tried so hard for so long.

I'm not venting. I'm telling my truth.

I hope today is a better day for you. If you need to take advantage of the people offering you help that is a good thing for both of you. Don't you feel better when you help others? Maybe you will be helping someone tomorrow. I know from experience that life will be ok if we just don't give up. Many times I could not see an answer to a problem but I had faith and an answer always came. Sometimes the answer wasn't what I wanted but later I realized it was what I needed. Please keep trying.

[hunterd]

sending you lots of cyber hugs! And my words of wisdom are (). Okay you got me on that one

[mercadies25]

I WILL ONE OF THE FIRST ONES TO BUY YOUR BOOK! I like the blunt honesty with a dash of humor.

I can't tell you when the last time I was at a grocery store by myself.

I hate, hate, hate this disease and all the things it takes away from all of us.

I think that maybe you could volunteer a couple days a week at a hospital or child care center or even at a dog pound. Just do it right away. Once you get use to staying home it gets a bit too comfy.

Please continue to share your experiences and your wit, I do enjoy it.

Like everyone tells me you'll feel better tomorrow. LOL!

[Waydwnsouth1]

I'm sorry to hear you are having such terrible trouble @Thinkimjob. Of course, you know everyone here understands. Right now crying is probably the best thing for you to do.

I have made it point to always have something to look forward to. So everyday, I look forward to seeing someone, watching certain TV show or maybe ordering lunch from one of favorite eateries. I have done that for years. Long before I was DX with MS. Now, after I was DX it stopped. Then, as I gathered myself I got back on it. It really helps on really bad days.

[MermaidOP]

Ask, and you shall receive

Dear Thinkimjob,
Over the years I have learned from and appreciated your posts on this board. Thank you.

I have had MS for over forty-five years, but only in the past 15-20 years have I shown a lot of disability and needed much support. I empathize with your situation. This is my suggestion: take people up on their offers of help. I have made connections of great power and beauty with people I never would have met except that I accepted their offer of help when I needed it. You never know what the universe is sending you. You never know what you might not know.

Stay lifted,
Mermaid