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The Spoon Theory

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    The Spoon Theory

    Please take the time to read Christine Miserandino’s personal story and analogy of what it is like to live with sickness or disability.
    http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/ar...-spoon-theory/
    ~ Faith
    MSWorld Volunteer -- Moderator since JUN2012
    (now a Mimibug)

    Symptoms began in JAN02
    - Dx with RRMS in OCT03, following 21 months of limbo, ruling out lots of other dx, and some "probable stroke" and "probable CNS" dx for awhile.
    - In 2008, I was back in limbo briefly, then re-dx w/ MS: JUL08
    .

    - Betaseron NOV03-AUG08; Copaxone20 SEPT08-APR15; Copaxone40 APR15-present
    - Began receiving SSDI / LTD NOV08. Not employed. I volunteer in my church and community.

    #2
    The leader of my MS group brought this recently. It's a good thing to bring to others in your life. An easily understandable concrete explanation.
    Karen

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      #3
      Yes, it was good to read and have my family read. My sister recently came to visit and whenever I was using my energy on something that didn't matter she would say, "Don't waste your spoons on that!"

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        #4
        I am slowly introducing this to my kids and family. When asked to do something, I'll occasionally say "I don't have many spoons left" or "I've used all my spoons today and don't want to borrow from tomorrow."

        I think they're getting it. 😉

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          #5
          Well the "spoon theory" just about sums it up...I've used my own way similar to this to explain what I go through. I tell people I wake up with only so much energy and have to decide the best way to use it. Because when it's gone....it's gone. No pushing through like I used to be able to. Not like other people can when they are tired.

          I've seen people at work complain "I'm so tired" as they flit around like they just had coffee. I'm thinking "I'm so tired that I don't even have the energy to tell you I'm tired"

          I hate days when I wake up with only "2 spoons" instead of 12 Usually turns out to be an unproductive day.

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            #6
            Originally posted by VikingKitty View Post
            Well the "spoon theory" just about sums it up...I've used my own way similar to this to explain what I go through. I tell people I wake up with only so much energy and have to decide the best way to use it. Because when it's gone....it's gone. No pushing through like I used to be able to. Not like other people can when they are tired.

            I've seen people at work complain "I'm so tired" as they flit around like they just had coffee. I'm thinking "I'm so tired that I don't even have the energy to tell you I'm tired"

            I hate days when I wake up with only "2 spoons" instead of 12 Usually turns out to be an unproductive day.
            I totally agree VikingKitty. I had seen this "sticky" note for several months, but I never clicked to read it. Then I was listening to Jenny Lawson relate her battle with mental illness, when she mentioned the spoon theory. I quickly found the sticky and found it describes the battle of chronic illness so well.

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              #7
              It seems some of us have more spoons than others. I think my spoons are only about 1/4 teaspoon.




              i

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                #8
                G'Day Guys this is a great way to describe our energy and I have used it before for family, but it gets harder to explain when you wake up and you just know that you won't be finding all your spoons today, and what are left are more then a little tarnished.

                My fatigue is impossible to manage lately, I can just feel the energy draining out of me, if I go for a walk out the back yard by the time I come inside im stumbling and dragging myself have a great day Craig

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                  #9
                  Spoon Thieves

                  And remember to beware of “spoons thieves.”

                  To me the biggest “spoon thief” is negativity. Sometimes the negativity comes from within or sometimes it comes from an outside source such as other people, songs, the news, etc. It's harder to stay positive when you're running low on spoons, so don't let other sources steal whatever spoons you have.

                  The days I start out with less spoons, the more I have to accept “what is” and not let my fatigue turn into negativity and steal the rest of my spoons. I know, easier said than done.

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                    #10
                    Originally posted by VikingKitty View Post
                    And remember to beware of “spoons thieves.”

                    To me the biggest “spoon thief” is negativity. Sometimes the negativity comes from within or sometimes it comes from an outside source such as other people, songs, the news, etc. It's harder to stay positive when you're running low on spoons, so don't let other sources steal whatever spoons you have.

                    The days I start out with less spoons, the more I have to accept “what is” and not let my fatigue turn into negativity and steal the rest of my spoons. I know, easier said than done.
                    Learning about and reading the spoon theory helped clarify a couple decisions I had to make.

                    I had to end my relationship with my sister at least 8 years ago, right after diagnosis, due to the "drama" that emanated from maintaining the relationship. I had to explain to her daughter that I had to think of myself, first, because I knew attempting to have a relationship would be debilitating. Then I had to end my relationship with my brother a few months ago due to a decision he made that I strongly disagreed with. In order to release the anger, I just had to let the relationship go. It's a tough decision, but I have to place myself and my needs first. MS is hard enough without all the drama that comes with dysfunctional relationships.

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                      #11
                      ru4cats - I totally understand and agree about severing dysfunctional drama-filled relationships. They will drain you like a vampire.

                      And btw, yes, "I am for cats" like your profile name says "ru4cats" ---now there is something that has brought immeasurable joy to my life...cats

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                        #12
                        I was feeling down the other day about being tired and "unproductive". My mother said I wasn't "doing nothing", I was "gathering spoons". I almost cried, I felt so understood.
                        Newbie

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                          #13
                          Originally posted by newbie but goodie View Post
                          I was feeling down the other day about being tired and "unproductive". My mother said I wasn't "doing nothing", I was "gathering spoons". I almost cried, I felt so understood.
                          A+.........

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                            #14
                            Originally posted by newbie but goodie View Post
                            I was feeling down the other day about being tired and "unproductive". My mother said I wasn't "doing nothing", I was "gathering spoons". I almost cried, I felt so understood.
                            AWESOME It's wonderful to feel understood.

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                              #15
                              Originally posted by palmtree View Post
                              It seems some of us have more spoons than others. I think my spoons are only about 1/4 teaspoon.


                              I wish I could lend you some of my spoons

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