Not my fault, so why get angry?

[ms382012]

Why, exactly, does someone who freaking KNOWS its neurological still get so darn mad when I slur my words?

My husband drives me insane when he does this. He gets so flustered when he can't understand what I'm saying. As if I am deliberately slurring my speech and trailing off to tick him off. Sure, honey, its' a deliberate plot. I spend my free time maniacally plotting ways to drive you insane with slurred speech. Totally deliberate and not at all due to steadily worsening neurological functioning from a disease robbing me of balance, focus, and energy. I guess the state our house is in is part of my fake exhaustion too.

[poohb3ar]

that's a hard place to be! when the one you expect support from doesn't understand and even worse makes you feel like crap for feeling like crap!!!
bless your heart!

come and vent here anytime! i'm sure many more of us have had similar experiences.
i can't remember the right words and we end up playing charades all the time. not fun!

let's not talk about dirty houses! if i wasn't taking so much meds and didn't get so little disability maybe we could afford to hire someone to clean it good once in awhile! (now there's dreaming for ya!

have you tried talking when you're both calm or even writing him a letter, you're very articulate in your writing, about how it makes you feel when he puts you down or makes fun of you?
it might help, at least you would have tried communicating with him.
communication is key to keeping relationships alive and unfortunately, MS is great at messing up relationships.
but that's a whole other forum!

praying that ya'll can work things out. don't stew too long & not say anything, it just makes things worse, believe me.

take care & God bless ya!

[Marco]

/I'm sorry that you find yourself in this situation. MS certainly adds to the stress of relationships. It's easy to get sideways, but hopefully your husband is also not trying to intentionally inflict pain. My wife and I have gotten into the habit of saying, "I'm on your side" to reinforce our support for one another. This often diffuses the situation and helps us reset the conversation.

I know you did not ask for advice, but I did want to suggest a few things:
Have you ever considered speech therapist evaluation?
Have you ever considered marriage counseling?
Does your husband go to medical appointments with you?
Can your doctor or other medical professional sit him down?

My speech gets worse when I am tired, stressed or rushing. A speech therapist helped me set boundaries and improve my breathing. My speech is not perfect, but it is improved over what it was before. My wife has also become more attuned with my meltdown symptoms and she helps protect me from myself and others. Please let us know how things progress and thank you for sharing so we can all learn together.