I have an update. I sat him down and in a very caring way told him that his behavior is not normal. I used some resources from the computer in regards to anger, bi-polar, and anxiety. He fell apart saying that he thought he was normal and everyone else was just crazy. We ended up going to a crisis center and it helped a lot. Since he has started Ativan he's has changed completely. He's still leaving but at least I feel better knowing he's leaving with some education and coping skills.
It's weird cuz I've been single for 7-8 years and I'm only 34 lol. I have always been independent and left relationships at the first sign of something funky. My daughters dad hit me while I was pregnant. He apologized but I was on the next flight home. There is no excuse. The only reason I think I gave joe an inch this time is because when we were young he saved me from abuse at home. He was my safe place. Were only 13. I don't know if I mentioned before that we were each other's first love for almost two years we were inseparable. We shared many firsts together and he was so special to me and now we had just found each other after 20 years.
There's so much good about him but it will never matter if he can't get a handle on his anger. That is what people tend to remember. His sex drive is less now, I guess it's the Ativan. But that's just a band aid so I can't just go back and trust him. There's a lot of work to be done here and if he truly loves me he will follow through with therapy even when I'm not there to harp on him to go.
He still has these outrageous plans that aren't realistic. He wants to by this piece of land for 179$ a month (he has no steady work) and bring his 3 kids back out here for the summer and stay in a Winnebago parked on the land. No electricity or water hook ups. I think that would be considered an unsafe environment for the kids. I told him I love kids but in my condition I can't have 6 people in my one bedroom home for the summer. Especially 4 of them being kids. I would love for him to get his own place and be near but he is so unrealistic and if I try to break down the real life steps to achieve his plans he gets upset because it shows him that his plans can't happen.
It's just too much stress for this sick ole girl. I appreciate everyone's concerns. I can't wait to have my space and sanity back.
It's weird cuz I've been single for 7-8 years and I'm only 34 lol. I have always been independent and left relationships at the first sign of something funky. My daughters dad hit me while I was pregnant. He apologized but I was on the next flight home. There is no excuse. The only reason I think I gave joe an inch this time is because when we were young he saved me from abuse at home. He was my safe place. Were only 13. I don't know if I mentioned before that we were each other's first love for almost two years we were inseparable. We shared many firsts together and he was so special to me and now we had just found each other after 20 years.
There's so much good about him but it will never matter if he can't get a handle on his anger. That is what people tend to remember. His sex drive is less now, I guess it's the Ativan. But that's just a band aid so I can't just go back and trust him. There's a lot of work to be done here and if he truly loves me he will follow through with therapy even when I'm not there to harp on him to go.
He still has these outrageous plans that aren't realistic. He wants to by this piece of land for 179$ a month (he has no steady work) and bring his 3 kids back out here for the summer and stay in a Winnebago parked on the land. No electricity or water hook ups. I think that would be considered an unsafe environment for the kids. I told him I love kids but in my condition I can't have 6 people in my one bedroom home for the summer. Especially 4 of them being kids. I would love for him to get his own place and be near but he is so unrealistic and if I try to break down the real life steps to achieve his plans he gets upset because it shows him that his plans can't happen.
It's just too much stress for this sick ole girl. I appreciate everyone's concerns. I can't wait to have my space and sanity back.
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