22yrs, 2 grown kids and He can't cope with a future with me

[hunterd]

mrs 1885. you are AWSOME!!!!

[ewizabeth]

I hear this too often and it makes me so sad. I think that karma will find these folks eventually. I hope that you have a good attorney because with this situation you may be due more than half even in a community property state. Hugs to you...

[Camsue]

I agree! mrs 1885 you are AWESOME!!!

[ledybug]

Wondering

Been married 23 years here...Dx'd with MS for the last 8 yrs. Always wonder when he will get fed up with all of me & this MSter!

[loopey]

My dad left my mom after she was dx when I was 16 years old. That was in the 1960's and everyone in our family kept saying she wasn't really sick.

Now I have MS and I feel the same as some other posters. I keep wondering when my husband will get fed up and leave. I was terribly impacted by what my dad did.

My mom got through it and I have never forgiven my dad. They are both gone now and I know that as hard as things seem sometimes, we can muster strength that we never knew we had.

I hope you get through this and find peace and happiness.

[MargaritaC]

22 years and 2 grown children....

Its not the M.S. and it darn sure isn't you! The man wanted to stray so he did. I hate to be so blunt. But you have to be thinking it. He cheated. That's adultry. Get a good attorney and make sure your medical conditions are mentioned. You could stay right where you are with the fatigue and such. One never knows with this mess. If you need to talk, give me a shout. I am just a few mile away on the Oregon coast. Margarita

[KATHY SUE]

Told I am worthless

I am reading an old post, but it fits in with what I am dealing with today. I have MS and dealing with fore-arm crutches, pain, balance etc. Husband asked me, "why do you live?" You don't contribute to our financial situation, you don't work, just go live with your parents. Who would ever hire you? At a place where I am starting to crumble. Trying to get employment but nothing on line will work for me. He doesn't want me to have our computer connected to anyone else. Won't stop yelling. I am afraid to leave. Don't have $$$ for divorce lawyer.

[babyduckling]

Kathy Sue my heart goes out to you. I don't know what to say.

[lavenderteawithme_33]

Kathy Sue,

Can you call and go to a councillor to ask for help or call a women's shelter to ask for help.

MS is hard/stressful enough for you and i feel that the way your talked to is very wrong. You need somone to help guided you and find a way out (if that is was you want). Sounds like your afraid of him. Maybe talk with some close family /friends for help. Use there computers or go visit the library .

Take care of your self and please call someone to ask for help. Thinking of you. Keep us posted on how you are.

[KATHY SUE]

Bad Relationships

I thank you all for responding. I am trying to figure out my next steps. I think there is a person to call at the MS Society that deals with this. I am ready. I know there are others that have gone through similar situatios. I appreciate you listening. Thank you.

[lavenderteawithme_33]

KATHY SUE,

GLAD TO HERE YOUR CALLING THE MS SOCIETY FOR HELP.
I THOUGHT OF THAT AFTER SENDING THE MESSAGE LAST NIGHT.
PLEASE KEEP US POSTED HOW YOU ARE.
SORRY YOU HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS.

THINKING OF YOU,
LAVENDER

[spunkles]

I am reading an old post, but it fits in with what I am dealing with today. I have MS and dealing with fore-arm crutches, pain, balance etc. Husband asked me, "why do you live?" You don't contribute to our financial situation, you don't work, just go live with your parents. Who would ever hire you? At a place where I am starting to crumble. Trying to get employment but nothing on line will work for me. He doesn't want me to have our computer connected to anyone else. Won't stop yelling. I am afraid to leave. Don't have $$$ for divorce lawyer.

Kathy Sue, I am soooooooooooo sorry to hear this. As I just told my husband when reading this to him, he may be a pain in my behind sometimes but, as I also told him him when he disclosed his MS to me 20 years ago, we are all defective in some way. I have no hearing in one ear and am slowly losing it in the other. Unfortunately, your husband is more defective than all of us put together. I know it's not much help but at least people are here to listen. Although I just signed up as a caregiver for one pain in the butt so we'll see how that goes.

[VikingKitty]

I don't have any advice but it made my stomach roll over reading your story. I feel awful for you.

I pray that somehow you get through it all and come out with a better tomorrow.

[TerriLC]

Creeps

Just make sure y'all get spousal support, and as much as possible. In California once you've been married 9 years you can get spousal support in your divorce decree. Go get it !!!

[Krysalus]

hugs and more hugs

so - both my ex and I have MS. He came home one day and said he needed to go find himself. Classic mid-life crisis - new hair, new clothes, new car, new girl. I was devastated.
My son was devastated. How do you explain to an 8yr old that daddy wants to live with a woman with 2 other kids but not him?


Here we are 10+ years later and the new girl is gone. The car was replaced with a more practical model. The clothes and hair... well let's just say.. he's looked better.

Me? New guy (wasn't looking but there he was!) New job. New world. I'm happy.

The MS didn't make him cheat. He was dumb and stupid. His son has no respect for him. Forget the 'wonderful' example he set. Nenebird - get a good lawyer and don't let him get away with anything. Sorry all you guys out there. I know some of you are good.

Kathie Sue - call your local woman's shelter or the MS society if you can't get out of the house. You need help and support, not anger and abuse. Not all abuse is physical. Mental abuse is just as damaging but is often ignored or overlooked.

Hugs to you both. Wishing you both all the best from someone who's been there, done that, got the T - Shirt.