Thought I'd share some positive disclosure stories, since we often think more about the ones that ended poorly.
There are a couple of people to whom I've been meaning to disclose for several months, but just haven't felt the opportunity was right - because they were going through rough times, or because I wasn't sure if our relationship was close enough to do so etc. You all know the issues.
Last week, one of my figure skating coaches (for adult group lessons) guessed what the issue is. I'd mentioned to him in the past that I had some neurological issues that may or may not be affecting my ability to learn this one skill. And I've been working on it forever. I dropped a few more hints a couple weeks ago when he said in 20+ years of coaching, he'd never had anyone have the trouble I have with this.
Last week, nobody else was there for the lesson, and he asked more specifically about injury - I was in a serious traffic accident a couple years back, and this likely triggered the exacerbation that got me diagnosed (or one of the subsequent surgeries did - you get the picture). He asked what exactly was damaged in the accident. He asked specifically about my spinal cord because I'd mentioned it before. I hesitated, and told him that was actually from a disease. And he said, "Oh, like Multiple Sclerosis?" I was stunned. Who guesses that, unless they've known someone with it?
Anyway, our session ended up being great - in the last few weeks, he's turned into a much better coach for me. We've had some issues about personal working style in the past - not enough for me to switch class days, but enough that I tended to gravitate toward the other instructor more. Turns out his mother had mobility issues for other reasons in her final years, and he related some of that in teaching me.
Just had to share that positive experience - I know I really should've said something earlier in our work together, but I just didn't want the coaches to give up on me by writing it off as MS.
FURTHER - I then had the courage to disclose to a friend, too. I suppose I should say that the only issues I have regularly are heat-related and fatigue-related, but they are pretty easily explained away. This friend was really surprised ("I didn't see that coming!"), but was super cool about it - asking, "Oh, is that why, that one time ...?" I figured it would probably go well because she has some chronic issues herself, just not progressive.
Two more imminent disclosures to go, now, and I'm feeling pretty positive. Wishing you all as much success as I've had the last few weeks!
There are a couple of people to whom I've been meaning to disclose for several months, but just haven't felt the opportunity was right - because they were going through rough times, or because I wasn't sure if our relationship was close enough to do so etc. You all know the issues.
Last week, one of my figure skating coaches (for adult group lessons) guessed what the issue is. I'd mentioned to him in the past that I had some neurological issues that may or may not be affecting my ability to learn this one skill. And I've been working on it forever. I dropped a few more hints a couple weeks ago when he said in 20+ years of coaching, he'd never had anyone have the trouble I have with this.
Last week, nobody else was there for the lesson, and he asked more specifically about injury - I was in a serious traffic accident a couple years back, and this likely triggered the exacerbation that got me diagnosed (or one of the subsequent surgeries did - you get the picture). He asked what exactly was damaged in the accident. He asked specifically about my spinal cord because I'd mentioned it before. I hesitated, and told him that was actually from a disease. And he said, "Oh, like Multiple Sclerosis?" I was stunned. Who guesses that, unless they've known someone with it?
Anyway, our session ended up being great - in the last few weeks, he's turned into a much better coach for me. We've had some issues about personal working style in the past - not enough for me to switch class days, but enough that I tended to gravitate toward the other instructor more. Turns out his mother had mobility issues for other reasons in her final years, and he related some of that in teaching me.
Just had to share that positive experience - I know I really should've said something earlier in our work together, but I just didn't want the coaches to give up on me by writing it off as MS.
FURTHER - I then had the courage to disclose to a friend, too. I suppose I should say that the only issues I have regularly are heat-related and fatigue-related, but they are pretty easily explained away. This friend was really surprised ("I didn't see that coming!"), but was super cool about it - asking, "Oh, is that why, that one time ...?" I figured it would probably go well because she has some chronic issues herself, just not progressive.
Two more imminent disclosures to go, now, and I'm feeling pretty positive. Wishing you all as much success as I've had the last few weeks!
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