I have ran into several people who have the most disgusting attitude when it comes to illness. Unfortunately some of these people are in my close circles, so to speak.
I´m having a mentally hard time dealing with their attitude. It comes up every now and then. How on Earth can I make these people understand that I really feel sick and incapacitated often? There are so many symptoms and problems that don't show on the outside.
Essentially, these people think that one is faking illness or talking about the illness in order to take some advantage.
In theory, I understand the point, this might happen to anyone of us some time. But from the perspective of a person with a handicap, say ms, this attitude towards people with illnesses is unbearable! I really don't feel I'm trying to take an advantage from the fact that I am sick, at least not in 90% of the situations ( the 10% I will accept as human).
To make this more concrete:
- my mother thinks people who receive disability benefits are not really disabled to the most part; they just don't want to work and they just have managed to fool the system
- one of my bosses thinks that a worker who takes a day off due to sickness is (usually) just being lazy
- the father of my child (my ex) thinks that when I ask him to take care of the child next week/tomorrow evening/later the day because I am feeling sick, I am not really sick, just playing it, in order to get some child free time. He has this doubt even though I would take time to tell him everything in detail: that I am nauseous, fatigued and feel funny in the eyes, will call doctor x and possibly try to go to the emergency, to get evaluated for the steroids etc.
Last time this happened he was really aggressive again and texted: "you are just using your illness to bounce me around."
- all of these people believe that depression is just something that people fake because it suits them
I would rather kick this kind of people out of my life now. But it's not really possible, as they are closely involved in my life :-( I feel bad enough with my health and other problems already. These people are making me feel so much more miserable.
It is true there are probably often situtions where one could be more courageous, more active, try harder, be more positive, just get up and go and do it. But where is the limit? The limit is there where you just are too tired to do any of these things. How do we know that one has reached one's limits? You just have to rely on your subjective feeling of tiredness. Isn't it so? Please tell me.
The objective measure comes in with the formal approval of disability, or sickness leave, for example. But, as I said, these people I'm speaking about don't acknowledge even these authorities.
Yes, as I said, if I could, I would stay away from these kind of people. Unfortunately I am not only involved but also in various respects DEPENDENT on them. Call it a living hell.
I´m having a mentally hard time dealing with their attitude. It comes up every now and then. How on Earth can I make these people understand that I really feel sick and incapacitated often? There are so many symptoms and problems that don't show on the outside.
Essentially, these people think that one is faking illness or talking about the illness in order to take some advantage.
In theory, I understand the point, this might happen to anyone of us some time. But from the perspective of a person with a handicap, say ms, this attitude towards people with illnesses is unbearable! I really don't feel I'm trying to take an advantage from the fact that I am sick, at least not in 90% of the situations ( the 10% I will accept as human).
To make this more concrete:
- my mother thinks people who receive disability benefits are not really disabled to the most part; they just don't want to work and they just have managed to fool the system
- one of my bosses thinks that a worker who takes a day off due to sickness is (usually) just being lazy
- the father of my child (my ex) thinks that when I ask him to take care of the child next week/tomorrow evening/later the day because I am feeling sick, I am not really sick, just playing it, in order to get some child free time. He has this doubt even though I would take time to tell him everything in detail: that I am nauseous, fatigued and feel funny in the eyes, will call doctor x and possibly try to go to the emergency, to get evaluated for the steroids etc.
Last time this happened he was really aggressive again and texted: "you are just using your illness to bounce me around."
- all of these people believe that depression is just something that people fake because it suits them
I would rather kick this kind of people out of my life now. But it's not really possible, as they are closely involved in my life :-( I feel bad enough with my health and other problems already. These people are making me feel so much more miserable.
It is true there are probably often situtions where one could be more courageous, more active, try harder, be more positive, just get up and go and do it. But where is the limit? The limit is there where you just are too tired to do any of these things. How do we know that one has reached one's limits? You just have to rely on your subjective feeling of tiredness. Isn't it so? Please tell me.
The objective measure comes in with the formal approval of disability, or sickness leave, for example. But, as I said, these people I'm speaking about don't acknowledge even these authorities.
Yes, as I said, if I could, I would stay away from these kind of people. Unfortunately I am not only involved but also in various respects DEPENDENT on them. Call it a living hell.
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