some info about we GLBTpeople

[technogay]

I don't like the idea of splitting up one bit. If you both love and respect each other it will work out. I've been with my parner for 21 yrs. She's outside every chance she gets and understands my limitations

Let love and compassion takes it course.

Technogay

I just wanted to say "hi" and introduce myself. My name is Jean and I was dx'd 6 months ago in March 2010. I'm on Copaxone and it is working out for me (meaning -- no side effects except for the injection site irritation).

I've been with my partner now for almost 4 years. When I was first diagnosed, she was very supportive. But I wonder if long term our relationship will work.

She is a very active person that loves to be outside. I, on the other hand, have never liked being outside much.

Of course, now I understand why I never liked being outside -- I always feel yucky due to the heat. Regardless of the weather, I have never been an especially active person because of my near constant fatigue.

In the end, I feel it would be the kind, appropriate thing to end our relationship -- then she shouldn't be brought down by someone with health issues when she is so healthy and active. I love her very much, and I want to do the right thing.

Has anyone had that issue?

Jean
dx March 2010

[fishead]

I just wanted to say "hi" and introduce myself. My name is Jean and I was dx'd 6 months ago in March 2010. I'm on Copaxone and it is working out for me (meaning -- no side effects except for the injection site irritation).

I've been with my partner now for almost 4 years. When I was first diagnosed, she was very supportive. But I wonder if long term our relationship will work.

She is a very active person that loves to be outside. I, on the other hand, have never liked being outside much.

Of course, now I understand why I never liked being outside -- I always feel yucky due to the heat. Regardless of the weather, I have never been an especially active person because of my near constant fatigue.

In the end, I feel it would be the kind, appropriate thing to end our relationship -- then she shouldn't be brought down by someone with health issues when she is so healthy and active. I love her very much, and I want to do the right thing.

Has anyone had that issue?

Jean
dx March 2010

Jean,

Think LONG and HARD before you end the relationship because you are trying to be kind or do the "right" thing. I let my partner of 9 yrs go, after my diagnosis, because I thought I was being "noble" and "kind", regarding the MS issues. Turns out, all I did was hurt her horribly. She still IS here for me, albeit, now as a friend and I feel bad about this, but cannot turn back time. So in the end, all I accomplished was hurting her and myself. Please please, think about this. Maybe even talk it over with HER, but don't "just do it". Good luck to you, whatever your decision.

[gabbo7]

Love

Yeah I know what you mean about not wanting to burden our partners. He insists my MS does not change his love for me in any way. Still, I struggle in therapy with the guilt I feel being on disability and no longer contributing equally to the household. We love each other more than ever. It's been 10 years. Which is not to say I wouldn't like to murder him sometimes. . He can be overprotective and more than a little irritating. On balance, though, I think I'm the luckiest guy in the world.

[fishead]

It is interesting that with all my issues with my family, I cannot tell which bothers them more, that I am lesbian, or that I have MS. ....
Also, I am very lucky to have a wonderful partner of 9 years. She is supportive of me, but doesn't always understand my symptoms. ...
... wonder if MS depression is making it feel worse than it really is. I have a lot to be happy for, and now I have this group. I really appreciate that I am not the only one. {shortened for space-LaTish}

Epice,
I am very happy you found MS World and this thread!! Please feel free to come here anytime, and be sure to look around this site, as there are many good and helpful items in MS World.

Namaste,
LaTish
(aka fishead aka FishOP}

[Chais Papa]

It seems trying to spare your partner of the trauma of dealing with MS is more common than I imagined. About a year after my DX I began to feel that my SO would be better off without me.

I encouraged her to be more self reliant and independent. I told her that I was unsure of everything in my life, my job and ability to provide, my health, and the future. I tried to pull away. I even took a job 1500 miles away so she could develop her independence.

But she finally told me that her commitment was life long irregardless of my health and abilities and followed me.
We are together most of the year except for a few months in the summer and I cherish our time together. She knows me better than anyone and understands my lifestyle (GID).

So far every thing is working out but who knows what the future will hold. I guess what I am saying is that don't push people away who care for you, be understanding and open to their feelings.