How do I help?

[c2thehelsea]

Hello,

Today my boyfriend told me that he believes he has MS, his dad and sister are both diagnosed with it, I know it's not supposed to be hereditary. He doesn't want to get tested because he's scared for it to be positive. He has all the same symptoms as his family member had when they first noticed. He's just turned 18, I was looking up MS because I'm only 17 and know NOTHING about it. I wish schools would teach you more about it. Anyways most of it says early treatment is best. How am I supposed to get him to be brave enough to go to the doctors? I believe he knows that he does have MS, he's been with his dad through it all for the past 8 years.
Thanks!

-- Chelsea *

[TLC_31]

Yes, it's scary to have to go to the doctor. But it's even scarier later on, when he might have to go on short notice because symptoms become unmanageable and/or intolerable.

Offer to go with him and learn about what he's going through. Offer to go through training and give him shots occasionally if he ends up on one of the injectable drugs.

Attacking the disease as early as possible will benefit him in the long run, and it will benefit you if you are to be his life partner. Yes, you're only 17 and you don't necessarily want to be thinking about husband and family at this point, but he does need to be thinking more long-term about his life. I'm not qualified to play the role of relationship adviser, but if he's not willing to look out for the interests of himself and his future wife and children, whoever they may be, it might be time for you to move on with your life.

[zolar16]

You poor thing! That is a lot of pressure for someone in their teens. You sound like a wonderful girlfriend who really cares about her BF.

Try sitting down with him to talk about this. Tell him you love him and care about him, and you want him to get tested. He is probably scared because he's seen what it's done to his dad and sister, and he's only 18 and he's afraid the plans he's made for his life may not work out the way he'd wanted. Tell him you'll support him and help him however you can, but you want him to take care of his health and getting treated for MS (if he has it) is what he need to do. Good luck.

[Torn]

It is very scary to think you have this disease. Especially if he has watched his family members live threw it all. Let him know he needs to find out sooner or later. They are making so many advances in treatment and the sooner he starts, if he even has it, the better. It might be he has scared himself into thinking he has it. Convincing himself his systems fit. And maybe he does have it, but he needs to find out. It will be peice of mind just to know. Tell him there are so many new drugs coming out that are better than those his family members have probably been on. It is no longer the same dx it use to be. No, it's not fun, and it sucks, but if he has it it won't change whether he is dx or not. Knowing helps with the healing so much! Hope this helps.