First off, I'm the one with rrms. Pretty stable now, but wasn't always and it made me freak out from stress on a regular basis in the past.
We have a nine year old boy who has made a career out of throwing temper tantrums and poouting when things don't work out the way he'd like. He turns it around though, blaming himself and calling himself stupid on those occasions when it does not occur to him to call the situation/game/whatever made him mad stupid instead. Either way, something is stupid and is used as cause to react unfavorably. Have contemplated numerous responses to his embarassing behaviors- none of it legal. Lately we've just taken to removing him from the scene of the tantrum/undesirable behavior, no matter what it will result in him missing out on. We rarelyt did this in the past because we didn't want him to miss out on social interaction and anything that mightbe fun. Tonight he was participating in a game at his boy scouts' troop meeting where they each had a balloon tied to their ankle and ther object was to pop each other's balloons witihout getting their own popped. It was all laughing and hysterical fun until HIS balloon got popped, whereupon he was crying and carrying on about it. I wasn't there but my husband said he just took him home right then and pointed out to him that no one else was acting that way, therefore he was done. Typically, his tantrums increase our anxiety levels and we have responded in the past with yelling. We are making an effort to be as boring as possible with this issue, but it is too early to see if it is working.
Has anyone else dealt with this? The kid is a little perfectionist and it's hard to get him to understand no one is perfect and sometimes things don't work the way we want for a good reason. This latest "stop the world I wanna get off" tactic- is it appropriate for a nine year old, or does a spanking/loss of privileges sound more like the way to go? We had him in counseling and the counselor suggested making things as drama free as possible, like we are trying now. I gootta say, sometimes I feel like he does it on purpose/to manipulate, even though the counselor thought it sounded like he simply needs more practice developing better coping skills.
We have a nine year old boy who has made a career out of throwing temper tantrums and poouting when things don't work out the way he'd like. He turns it around though, blaming himself and calling himself stupid on those occasions when it does not occur to him to call the situation/game/whatever made him mad stupid instead. Either way, something is stupid and is used as cause to react unfavorably. Have contemplated numerous responses to his embarassing behaviors- none of it legal. Lately we've just taken to removing him from the scene of the tantrum/undesirable behavior, no matter what it will result in him missing out on. We rarelyt did this in the past because we didn't want him to miss out on social interaction and anything that mightbe fun. Tonight he was participating in a game at his boy scouts' troop meeting where they each had a balloon tied to their ankle and ther object was to pop each other's balloons witihout getting their own popped. It was all laughing and hysterical fun until HIS balloon got popped, whereupon he was crying and carrying on about it. I wasn't there but my husband said he just took him home right then and pointed out to him that no one else was acting that way, therefore he was done. Typically, his tantrums increase our anxiety levels and we have responded in the past with yelling. We are making an effort to be as boring as possible with this issue, but it is too early to see if it is working.
Has anyone else dealt with this? The kid is a little perfectionist and it's hard to get him to understand no one is perfect and sometimes things don't work the way we want for a good reason. This latest "stop the world I wanna get off" tactic- is it appropriate for a nine year old, or does a spanking/loss of privileges sound more like the way to go? We had him in counseling and the counselor suggested making things as drama free as possible, like we are trying now. I gootta say, sometimes I feel like he does it on purpose/to manipulate, even though the counselor thought it sounded like he simply needs more practice developing better coping skills.
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