In a effort to not be insensitive I want to say that I feel for every person that has MS and all that it does to your life! I am dealing with the possibility that my husband has MS. His neuro told him that he probably has MS. I have become so depressed about the possible changes in our lives. I love him dearly but given the stress we are experiencing it is taking its toll. I try really hard to elminate stress from his world. I do all of the care taking for our daughters ages 6 and 4. I try to keep the house up as best as I can and cook. I take the kids where they need to be. I basically do everything without asking for help like I used to because I do not want to stress him out.
It is hard to keep this up and I am aware that over time I will slip and not be able to protect him from stress. In appreciation for my efforts he gets mad when I do not do what he thinks I should. This causes great resentment in me from him. It makes me want to walk away and let him take care of himself. My heart will not allow me to do that but some days are tough. He will not talk to me and that frustrates me. I am a counselor by profession so I consider myself good at getting people to talk to me. This possibility is taking its toll on me and my mental help.
I have had thoughts of suicide and thought of getting in my car and walking away from my whole life...kids and all. I want him to know and anyone else that has a spouse that does not have a disease like MS that we are hurting too. And this is very hard for everyone. I realize that he has the symptoms but the heartache the caregivers experience are devestating. I feel like we are only beginning to understand this disease and we are failing at coping with this.
I am just looking for any advice. I realize I may be jumping the gun since he has not been diagnosed but I am trying to prepare. Thanks for letting me vent about this.
**Post broken into paragraphs by Moderator for easier reading. Many people with MS have visual difficulties that prevent them from reading large blocks of print.**
It is hard to keep this up and I am aware that over time I will slip and not be able to protect him from stress. In appreciation for my efforts he gets mad when I do not do what he thinks I should. This causes great resentment in me from him. It makes me want to walk away and let him take care of himself. My heart will not allow me to do that but some days are tough. He will not talk to me and that frustrates me. I am a counselor by profession so I consider myself good at getting people to talk to me. This possibility is taking its toll on me and my mental help.
I have had thoughts of suicide and thought of getting in my car and walking away from my whole life...kids and all. I want him to know and anyone else that has a spouse that does not have a disease like MS that we are hurting too. And this is very hard for everyone. I realize that he has the symptoms but the heartache the caregivers experience are devestating. I feel like we are only beginning to understand this disease and we are failing at coping with this.
I am just looking for any advice. I realize I may be jumping the gun since he has not been diagnosed but I am trying to prepare. Thanks for letting me vent about this.
**Post broken into paragraphs by Moderator for easier reading. Many people with MS have visual difficulties that prevent them from reading large blocks of print.**
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