Struggling with losss of partner

[TravisT]

In May 2015, about 6 months after being diagnosed with MS I lost my best friend and fiancé with only 20 days to go until wedding day. We were together for 6 years and engaged a few months before the diagnosis. Since then, she has completely cut me off with no explanations outside of that she didn't want to get married. Throughout the summer I have since gotten involved with another, but am being constantly haunted by the thoughts of my recent loss and the question of why things happened the way they did. I get no response from the ex when I ask for an explanation. Complete and utter disrespect for my mental well being. I am to the point now that I lose sleep thinking about it and am missing work because of it as well.

Surprisingly, I get support in this matter from my new partner but I am afraid that she too will soon get tired of my mental struggles. So, I have started back in therapy to help this struggle. Yet, here I lay in bed at 2am.

Has anyone else out there had similar issues with love and MS? If so, do you have any suggestions on how to cope and get through the depression?

Travis

[Tia1]

Sorry for the loss of your partner. I'm glad that you are seeking therapy to help you through this.

Do you think it is to soon to be in another relationship while your still have such strong feelings for someone else. If she leaves, it probably won't be because of MS, but because she doesn't have your heart and not first place. Someone else still has that place.

Could you slow down this new relationship, seems like you need a friendship, not a relationship (couple) Please take the time to grieve and to heal from your loss. I'm sorry that your partner left, but it could turn out to be for the best. (hugs)

[Karenkay]

I know it's a hard pill to swallow, it hurts. But I think it's better it happened now while you are still young and able to create a new life with someone else.

I was diagnosed 5 years into our marriage in 1989. After over 30 years of marriage, my husband is divorcing me. He stated many reasons why ... but the most prevalent was he didn't want to be married to MS any more.

[headrift]

Sounds like she got scared of the situation she would be put in with you and future MS. She might not see herself as strong enough, either to see you and what you'd go through, or herself and her place in that future with you.

Either way, she wanted out. Let her go. The new gf sounds at least reasonable. Letting the xgf go is healthy for all involved. What you have now might not last either, but as I've learned, if they don't stick around, you don't want them anyway.

Point of reference: I gave my gf the option of leaving for similar reasons a few months ago. She declined that offer, and now the two of us are getting married this fall after what will be four and a half years... she's a keeper, and I'm lucky. I hope you get as lucky.

[TravisT]

Thanks to everyone for your feedback. I am currently in a one day at a time mode. Time will heal. I know that. My new partner gives me the confidence and I believe in her devotion. All of this has been very hard to swallow for me since I grew up with a father who stuck by my mother's side throughout all of her issues with MS. I never thought I would be in this position, but, I am grateful to have had such great parents who showed me the true meaning of devotion. I guess that's why this situation is so hard.