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What is the general opinion about a small Thanksgiving gathering?

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    What is the general opinion about a small Thanksgiving gathering?

    I've been fighting with myself over this holiday for a week. My daughter wants to have us over for dinner. Her company gave her a turkey and she has not hosted in years. We will be about 8 people at the most if we all go through with it. We've been together over this last year a few times, but with all the warnings I'm really feeling reluctant. I don't want to be the one to ruin this for everyone. Anyone have any thoughts? Any suggestions? Thanks and Happy Thanksgiving.
    Marti




    The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.

    #2
    My opinion is to eat and enjoy as much of your family as much as you can. I will.
    The future depends on what you do today.- Gandhi

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      #3
      Hi Marti.

      I respect everyones decision on family gatherings. I am the one that hosts family gatherings. My children made the very difficult decision to not gather this Thanksgiving for the safety of my husband and myself. All of us are sad but their dad and I fully understand their very caring decisision.

      Marti, do what you feel is best for your health and "with love" share that decision with your Daughter.
      Diagnosed 1984
      “Lightworkers aren’t here to avoid the darkness…they are here to transform the darkness through the illuminating power of love.” Muses from a mystic

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by SNOOPY View Post
        Hi Marti.

        I respect everyones decision on family gatherings. I am the one that hosts family gatherings. My children made the very difficult decision to not gather this Thanksgiving for the safety of my husband and myself. All of us are sad but their dad and I fully understand their very caring decisision.

        Marti, do what you feel is best for your health and "with love" share that decision with your Daughter.
        Thanks so much. I asked my doctor friend about this... she has MS also.. Her response was much like yours. She is not in favor of any MS patient gathering in a group. At this point I know my kids are not infected. They have all been tested. But I haven't. On the other hand, I have not been out except to run through the grocery store... masked. Keeping everything at home sanitized and washing hands till they are raw.
        Marti




        The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by Boudreaux View Post
          My opinion is to eat and enjoy as much of your family as much as you can. I will.
          I'm thinking about wearing a mask while we are just talking and taking it off to eat of course. I want to be with my kids if I can. I think everyone will make this a short visit.
          Marti




          The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.

          Comment


            #6
            I understand the dilemma, Marti. Everyone must make their own decisions in these trying times. I would go and enjoy my family with all the appropriate precautions, but that is just me. Whatever you do I hope you will be safe and happy.

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              #7
              I’ll pass... I’m not looking to get corona. My understanding is that corona can cause progression in this disease because of all the inflammation going on. I could be wrong, I haven’t been to the dr in over a year so I’m going by different websites.

              I’ll just be glad when this is over. I’m ready to start traveling and going to events again. Although I don’t have much pto saved up since I’ve become very bad about leaving work early.

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by loopey View Post
                I understand the dilemma, Marti. Everyone must make their own decisions in these trying times. I would go and enjoy my family with all the appropriate precautions, but that is just me. Whatever you do I hope you will be safe and happy.
                Thanks Loopey. I didn't expect this to be such a hard decision. I have to tell you.... my cousin's son married a girl from Italy a few years ago and they just had twin boys a week ago (in Cleveland). The mother of the kids is a twin herself. Everyone is pretty excited... our first twins in the family. They were good sized... one over seven lbs and the other was nearly seven! This girl is from Sicily. Thought you would be interested.
                Marti




                The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by someone33 View Post
                  I’ll pass... I’m not looking to get corona. My understanding is that corona can cause progression in this disease because of all the inflammation going on. I could be wrong, I haven’t been to the dr in over a year so I’m going by different websites.

                  I’ll just be glad when this is over. I’m ready to start traveling and going to events again. Although I don’t have much pto saved up since I’ve become very bad about leaving work early.
                  Good to hear you are being careful. One of my MS doctors is recommended that all her MS patients keep it small or simply stay home. She told me that most doctors are not encouraging us to congregate in groups. She has MS herself and is staying at home.. no kids or grands. Have a safe and happy Thanksgiving. Maybe next year will be better for all of us.
                  Marti




                  The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by marti View Post

                    Good to hear you are being careful. One of my MS doctors is recommended that all her MS patients keep it small or simply stay home. She told me that most doctors are not encouraging us to congregate in groups. She has MS herself and is staying at home.. no kids or grands. Have a safe and happy Thanksgiving. Maybe next year will be better for all of us.
                    With the amount of cigarettes I used to smoke and the amount of stuff I still smoke every day I don't think my lungs needs anything else bothering them. I am amazed at the number of people who are going out and acting like their isn't a pandemic going on. Believe me I would LOVE to be able to go out and do things and have fun, but I prefer not dying from coronoa more. So I am with you, I am hoping next year will be better for everyone.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      I'd err on the side of caution this year, no matter how painful it is. I'm actually hosting my family tomorrow, but there's only 5 of us and we've seen each other regularly since the Covid began.

                      Happy Thanksgiving to all of you, whatever you decide!

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Hi Marti,
                        Just as long as your comfortable with everyone in attendance's exposure risks, go for it. Is this with just one other household? If I'm not mistaken, I recall your son still lives with you.

                        In "normal" times, my son would come home to celebrate the holiday with our family. He lives out of state in western NY, where he is graduate student and teaching assistant. He will be earning his PhD this spring, then moving to the south, for the job he's been offered. My daughter still lives with us at home.

                        My husband is still working from home and any shopping or food, if not delivered, is curbside pickup. My daughter took this semester off from college and sells some of her artwork on-line.

                        Normally, we go to my MILs first for Thanksgiving dinner with my husband's family, then go to my parent's house in the evening to visit with my family.

                        None of that is happening this year. We don't want to pass this along to our elderly parents, if we were to have it. Other than a few doctors appts the past week, have been home.

                        We were comfortable with my son coming home. He only went to campus once a week to teach one of his classes in person. The class was small, and there were no issues with social distancing. He has something to say about how important it is to "follow the science" every time we talk to him, which is at least twice a week. He's a scientist ... lol.

                        He doesn't live on campus. He lives about 30 minutes away, in a rural area, where he rents out a room in a farmhouse. His landlord lives in the newer section of the house, while he is in the original part of the home. She works from home. There is one other renter, but he is hardly ever there. Works well for him, and gets along well with his landlord.

                        But now that the borders between the U.S. and Canada are closed, he has to drive the longer route in U.S., instead of the shorter one thru Canada, to come home. So what was a four hour drive has changed to seven and half hours.

                        He could've come home, but decided not to. Long drive for him for short visit. He is also supposed to quarantine for 14 days upon returning to NY, but he wasn't concerned about that. All in person classes stopped this week and finish up remotely after Thanksgiving break. Not that anyone would be checking up on him. I think it kinda hit him he won't be with us though, he called and talked to us for four hours today. So it will just be the three of us this year.

                        My MIL still planning a smaller gathering with a couple of her six children. They visit her a few times a week, anyway.

                        My parents invited my family and my two brother's to their house for dinner. We are not going, and neither is my younger brother's family. We don't feel it's the safest thing to do right now, or be in close proximity to my other brother's family. They continue to take too many covid exposure risks, as "The virus isn't going to stop any of them from enjoying life," despite our area becoming a hot spot again. It was pretty bad here in the spring.

                        Sad to say, my 82 year old parents, both with other high risk factors, haven't been much better. Still hasn't sunk in to my parents that two good friends died from it this past week. Before that, my mom kept saying she didn't know anyone who'd gotten it.

                        My brother's oldest daughter, in her late 20's, got married in July. Decided to go thru with their original wedding plans the day our lockdown orders were lifted in June. Ignored state restrictions and invited over 160 people. No social distancing and just a handful of masks worn. Guests sat shoulder to shoulder at the outside ceremony, and reception, with dancing, was indoors.

                        Wouldn't have known there was a pandemic from the pictures. Needless to say, we didn't go. What should've been a happy time for our family instead gave rise to some hard feelings. Especially between my two brothers wives about something that happened with the wedding shower. The two of them haven't spoken since. No one got covid, so now they feel vindicated for going through with her "dream" wedding. Not worth it, IMO.

                        My brother has now decided to have my parents come to their house for Thanksgiving. They have a small house and both daughters will be there with their significant others. So that will be 4 different households together several hours. No one will be wearing masks and they all think hugs and kisses between them are fine. Ugh ...

                        Of course, I worry about all of them, but especially my parents.
                        Kimba

                        “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” ― Max Planck

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                          #13
                          Thought I'd tell you that my son and I went to one of my daughter's house. So there were just 4 of us. Everything turned out very well. However, my other daughter had to decline because she has pneumonia and her husband started vomiting a little blood due to an ulcer. So, we were well within the limits. Although we missed the others. Thanks so much guys!
                          Marti




                          The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by marti View Post
                            Thought I'd tell you that my son and I went to one of my daughter's house. So there were just 4 of us. Everything turned out very well. However, my other daughter had to decline because she has pneumonia and her husband started vomiting a little blood due to an ulcer. So, we were well within the limits. Although we missed the others. Thanks so much guys!
                            Glad everything worked out well for you, marti!

                            For the first time ever, it was just my dh and myself for dinner. Normally, we host around 18. It was strange and we sorely missed our large family get together, but it was stress free for us. And much safer!
                            1st sx '89 Dx '99 w/RRMS - SP since 2010
                            Administrator Message Boards/Moderator

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                              #15
                              Our decision, and our extended family decision, was not to meet for Thanksgiving.

                              My husband's parents bought each family a pumpkin pie, delivered it Wednesday and had a brief socially distanced, masked outdoor visit.

                              U
                              ~ Faith
                              MSWorld Volunteer -- Moderator since JUN2012
                              (now a Mimibug)

                              Symptoms began in JAN02
                              - Dx with RRMS in OCT03, following 21 months of limbo, ruling out lots of other dx, and some "probable stroke" and "probable CNS" dx for awhile.
                              - In 2008, I was back in limbo briefly, then re-dx w/ MS: JUL08
                              .

                              - Betaseron NOV03-AUG08; Copaxone20 SEPT08-APR15; Copaxone40 APR15-present
                              - Began receiving SSDI / LTD NOV08. Not employed. I volunteer in my church and community.

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