I love the nightlife, not.

[Thinkimjob]

Birthday dinner party at restaurant (not my birthday) last night. "There'll only be eight people, and you know all of them, we won't stay too long, we'll sit close to the exit and the lavatory; it'll be fine."

Ha ha ha ha ha. Twenty-six people. Table at the far, far, far end of the restaurant.

Air conditioner not working, lots of loud, loud, loud talking and girly shrieking.

Yes, I knew most of them, but I got stuck sitting next to a hoity toity old nursing sister, who spent the first hour telling me MS was curable, and my diet must be wrong, and her daughter (whose party it was) had told her about this special oil, which I should get.

I said, "It's not curable. I've had it 16 years, trust me, if there was a cure, I'd know. I take a drug for it and my diet's fine."
"Oh you don't want to take drugs. Everyone would be healthier if they just stopped all their medication and ate a proper diet," says she.

I sat there hoping against hope I wouldn't get the urge to go. Three hours, worried, worried, worried. How am I going to get out of here without a disaster? How am I going to walk to the door?

Grabbed the friend who had persuaded me to go, said quietly, please can we go home now, you drop me off at home and you go back.

Hoping to sneak out quietly. She announced loudly, "My friend's really tired, we'll have to go."

"That happens when people have MS," said Mrs Hoity Toity.

Yes, thank you both, soooo much for that.

All heads turned to watch my triumphal stagger to freedom.

That's it for me and parties, until I get some wheels, not that that would have helped, because the restaurant only has steps.

[Tomjadg]

I understand.

I stopped going to anything with groups, even family functions. I have no interest in dealing with a multitude of questions, nor explanations.

There is always someone who knows what you should be doing..or not doing. Right.

[rdmc]

Hey Think,

Sorry about your evening. I totally understand, been there, done that.

We, too, went out with friends this weekend, and even though we had reservations at the restaurant, when we got there, I knew it would not be doable (is that a word?) for me. The restaurant was packed and was super noisy, with loads of folks waiting to be seated...and even with our reservations they told us it would be quite a while before we were seated.

I understand your dilemma with not having a ride home, and in our case, we had all driven together and I was honest and said I couldn't "maintain" my sanity or thought processes in that atmosphere (I knew it would have produced Walmart Syndrome on steroids.)

So we decided on another restaurant not too far from where we were, and called ahead. That restaurant too was noisy, but not so much as the other, but we were fortunate there was seating in the outside terrace with much less noise, low lighting with twinkly white strings of lights, and the temp was just right (living in Florida in winter has it's perks ) We had a pleasurable dining experience and the other couple we were with, totally understood why we needed to change restaurants.

We don't do restaurants often just because of the unpredictability of the atmosphere (i.e. talking volume needed to be heard in a crowded restaurant, seating proximity to other diners, background music, etc. I'm much more confortable having a house full of dinner guests, than going out with others to a restaurant. So we have folks over for the most part (my husband is a big help, as are other family members if we have a large group.)

I hate being in situations like you were in and feel trapped, having to pretend like you're having a good time, when in reality your body is giving you the "Danger Will Robinson" alert, urging you to escape the noise and confusion.

Hope your next experience is more pleasant.

[misslux]

That sounds like a hellish evening.

[AnneLouise]

I don't have anything to tell you, but can relate.

I've become very selective with whom I spend my time. And where. There are certain people that care about me, know my struggles and are understanding. They are the ones I want to be with.

Personally, I think Mrs. Hoity Toity was rude. You did not make the effort to join the party to listen to her.

[DebbieB]

Job, sorry this happened to you. What a night. I, too, am very particular about when/where/who I go out with. I feel like such an "old lady", but have to define my boundaries.

Sorry for your bad night...

[choco]

As others have said, Mrs Hoity Toity was just plain rude and showed no consideration whatsoever for you. She probably made you feel worse both physically and mentally. In which case she deserved a response along the lines of "When I want your opinion I will ask for it" followed by a quick exit on your part. I never understand why we are reluctant to be rude when we are confronted by rudeness in others. I am learning to overcome this hesitancy and am not shy about responding as a feel and b not as I think.

[justacowgirl]

Job!!!
Where is that spunk we have come to know and love! Who cares what they think?

I would have told her that her dress was hideous; her hair horrific; her make up a disaster and her breath bad.

It's always fun to give some back. And no it's not nice but really fun.

J

[Fed Up]

Job!!!
Where is that spunk we have come to know and love! Who cares what they think?

I would have told her that her dress was hideous; her hair horrific; her make up a disaster and her breath bad.

It's always fun to give some back. And no it's not nice but really fun.

J

Gonna write that down and keep it!

not sure what I would do however, I am prepared now.

Thinkimjob; and I think I would ask for 'proof.' I'd love to meet one person that cured M.S. with diet. reading what she said, sure makes me angry. fed

[Thinkimjob]

I'm just about all spunked out.

[ewizabeth]

Our son is the drummer in local popular country rock band. The other parents generally show up for the shows at whichever bar, restaurant, lounge or festival where they play. I am the slacker mom who rarely shows up. I am totally exhausted at night, and I work all day. I can't socialize at night without being extra tired for days. I know he understands but others who keep sending me invites on Facebook for the shows must think I am brushing them off.

So I can relate to you in a sense.

[jkforrest]

a thought?


fyi: when people cant't SEE SEE SEE anything they think they are experts. Thought---I keep ALL ortho devices just in case---you can use the arm sling, crutches, splints, hand bandages or knee bandages etc etc etc or several lol lol lol then when they ask "oh my what happened" retort "just my MS my DOC told me to use "whatever" to help with latest symptom till I can get some relieve and NO I don't wish to talk about it thank thou for asking"!!!!!!!!!

[rdmc]

I'm just about all spunked out.

Wow, great line....made me smile.

[justacowgirl]

Job
I send prayers your way. You will be dinkum. You'll see.

J

[Thinkimjob]

She's cool. Just watched the new "Justified".
As Boyd Crowder says, "This ain't my first rodeo."