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When darkness falls.

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    When darkness falls.

    Went out for afternoon drinks and nibbles, as one does at Christmas. Big house, bigger garden, long, long way to walk to a chair.

    This is fine in daylight, and I can see where I am going, and what I can cling to.

    The sun is setting, I try to escape, three times. Finally I said, all right truly I have to go, lovely to see you, what's the shortest and simplest way out of here?
    The sun sets. "Don't worry, we'll help you."

    Two old school friends grabbed me on either side and more or less frogmarched me down stairs, up stairs, down a ramp with no railing and over what felt like miles of lawn and gravel.

    There was no arguing with them. It was frankly a bit terrifying, because my arms weren't free for emergency balance manoeuvring.

    I have never been so happy to reach my car.

    I know they really meant well and thought they were doing the right thing. Does anyone else find it worse when someone insists on giving you an arm to lean on?

    #2
    Oooh, excitement city! I may have made the 50,000th post!
    Is there prize money?

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      #3
      Nah, when someone has to help me onto the toilet that's when I'll feel worse, if I even want to go on. An arm is better than the pavement.

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        #4
        Originally posted by Thinkimjob View Post
        Does anyone else find it worse when someone insists on giving you an arm to lean on?
        Yup! People usually do the blind lady "elbow grab" but I need my arms for balance. Especially now, just had a wicked ice storm, so I need 1 arm for my cane.

        Plus, if and when I do go down, I'm a pro now. Don't want to risk taking someone down with me either!

        Did you get $$ for the 50,000 post?

        Jen
        RRMS 2005, Copaxone since 2007
        "I hope to be the person my dog thinks I am."

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          #5
          I don't mind the help, but they can't hook my elbow or be too close since my gait is all messed up. So it is better for them to grab my arm tight but at a farther distance.

          One thing also is that people go too fast no matter how slow they think they are going so it is best for me to lead and have them a little behind and on my right side.

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            #6
            Yes, well meaning people see me "waddling" on the ice so they want to help, but they do go too fast and I feel safer manuvering on my own. How do you politele refuse? This is at work and I feel they are all judging me and my progression as well. I dread Minnesta Winters!

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              #7
              No, Cat Mom,, but my name shall live on forever....

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                #8
                I always take a flashlight with me, when I leave home. Small and extremely efficient. My fear of having to have fake knee revision surgery is greater than fear of hurting my pride!fed

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                  #9
                  Yes, I sometimes feel man handled. LOL My husband means well but I'm trying to teach him what works best for me when I do need his support.

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                    #10
                    I get offers of help quite often, almost every time I go out.
                    I have learned, the "hard way", that some people know how to assist and some don't.

                    So now when a well meaning person comes to offer an assist...and often they do kind of forcefully...I stop them in their tracks and ask them if they "know what their doing", they know how to properly assist a disabled person. It's a skill quite frankly and it has to be learned.

                    If they say they don't know, I explain to them how to do it. Some say, "Well, I was a medic in Afghanistan...I think I can handle it." lol

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                      #11
                      ...this approach mortifies anyone I am with btw

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