Happy Birthday to Me...........

[Mynamegoeshere1]

I am being a big debbie downer this birthday. I am not depressed, but all I can think about is how I spent my last birthday. I had just gotten over the shingles and started having really bad muscle spasms that were so painful I could hardly move. This started the cycle of the 6-7 more ER visits that eventually made them take me serious and send me to the correct Dr's where I got my MS diagnosis very quickly. My last year just wasn't the best year in my opinion. I know I am celebrating a new year, but lots of my friends left me when I was diagnosed and a party would just remind me of what all I lost last year. I lost most of my mobility, most of my friends, my strength, my ability to work, officially labeled disabled by SSD, Neuro, and LTD's independent Neuro. I am so grateful for the wonderful family and husband I have, but I don't want a big party reminder of what all I have lost in the past year either. Is that wrong of me?

Another slap in the face yesterday was my family (cousins) put together a bbq benefit for family/friends with some auction items to raise money for my Dr bills and especially my wheelchair. That got cancelled due to extreme circumstances that were totally understandable and rescheduled for Dec. 1. Now they are using all of the items collected for a benefit for that auction/bbq for another person....................I am just a little hurt and ya, maybe I am just dwelling on a bad situation right now, and probably being VERY selfish. I know I have posted a lot of debbie downer things lately and have been moody......The Tysabri does the moodiness, but we are working with that, and I am talking with a counselor about the rest of it, but I am not sure she would understand all of this. Am I just being a total selfish jerk? My husband was going to just have brothers/in-law and sisters/in-law over for cake and I said no presents and no big party like we always do. and NO presents. Am I wrong?

[Thinkimjob]

Nah, have the party. It sucks, but hey ho. Happy birthday, anyway.

[Tomjadg]

I think you have the right to be annoyed by the family/friends using the money from the benefit for another person after telling you it was for you.
But, not knowing the details of what was involved, they might have needed to use the money, and it did help someone.

Have a nice, quiet party with close family/friends, but don't tell them no gifts, because that's what people like to do.

[cosake]

Have the small party, but have yourself a pity party, too, if you need to.

Perhaps you could say something like "No gifts, please. If you would like to do something to honor my birthday, please consider making a donation to XYZ MS, etc."

[Alicious]

There is nothing wrong with not feeling like celebrating. I'd be annoyed too about those items going to someone else; hopefully there is still a plan in place to help you, too.

Happy birthday, and may this year be better than last year.

[alishape]

Hmm...

It's your party, you can cry if you want to. It's okay to have negative feelings, but we all have to fight to have positive ones too! So I think you should throw the party anyways and get some joy out of your special day. You know, with the friends and loved ones you still have. If you can handle it, do it for yourself. It's bound to be better than spending your birthday alone and in a funk.

Have you gained anything in the past year? Maybe you can celebrate that.

[mjan]

Gosh my dear you can feel whatEVER you want to feel okay? Wow, what a year you have had! Shingles and spasms are sooo painful too!

But what bothers me is that they set you up to be cared for by doing this aution to cancel THEN give the items to someone else? And you are supposed to be okay with that? Wasn't your hubby upset too?

If you do not tell someone HOW you feel about this, it will only eat you up inside. You don't have to be mean, but just say, for example, "I was so honored that you cared enough to do this to help me, but I must say I am so hurt now by how you changed your minds and gave the items to someone else." Or.. something along those lines. If you don't tell him, then they think you are okay with how they treated you..and.. you are not, right?

So yup it up for your birthday. Geez, its the ONLY day that is truly ours. Better daze my dear.. better birthdays. You deserve the kindness and support..always~

{{{{ HUGS }}}}

Warmly, Jan

[Strhuntrss]

Birthday Blues

Have a Happy Birthday anyway.

The whole point of birthday's are celebrating your life with family and friends who love you and would not forsake you in tough times. Some people do not get to celebrate birthdays.

I know sometimes life throws us a curve and we have to react to it. One way or another we react and get over it.

Get over it. Plain and simple. We all but get one life. Don't waste it on the negative. MS &^&%'s. Plain and simple. BUT you CAN overcome anything if you put your mind to it.

Maybe that other person needed it more than you. Let it be an example of your unselfness.

I wish you the best and I wish you love of real family and friends. They never leave you or forsake you in good times and especially in bad times.

Eat cake and be happy. Celebrate THIS year. Last year is just that LAST YEAR. We fall down, get back up and dust ourselves off. All for the better. You can get through this and you will be better for it.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! EAT CAKE!

[gomer]

I have little to add to what has already been said.

What I can add is PEOPLE are far more important than things or money!

Try and have people, family friends etc around for your day. Who knows... you may have a bigger & better event at the later date?

Gomer Sir Falls-a-lot

[tortis]

birthday

I will not tell you anything except, Happy Birthday!!!!!!!



Tortis

[cm27lvn]

Happy birthday. Hope you have a good one!

[Cat Mom]

I'm not a fan of birthdays, don't like getting older... but, it's always nice that people care about the day you were born. Celebrate with people who feel this way and for Heaven's sake.... eat cake! Lots of it! I hope you have a happy birthday!
Jen

[CGMoonbeam]

I don't like anything that even feels like it might involve a great deal of effort on my part. I don't blame you for not wanting a party. I hope that you have a happy birthday the way that you want to.

[Mynamegoeshere1]

Just how I wanted it

My birthday was just how I wanted it. I napped a lot of the day. My puppies gave me extra snuggles and just me and my husband went out for dinner.

We are going to go to lunch or dinner with my parents, sister, brother and in-laws on saturday with cake, but that is just what I wanted too! I also asked for no presents from any of them moreso because all of them are having money troubles.

I am going to keep the benefit stuff to myself. It bothers me, but it will be ok. The other person is a nationwide known case. There are constantly 20-50 fundraisers going on for them and over 1 million dollars raised. They get sponsored and free equipment for their injury and free travels around the world for vacations and/or interviews. I respect the hell out of the person though so I will just say it is what it is..........

Thank you everyone for the birthday wishes.

[Seasha]

Good for you!!! Happy birthday