"Choose Your Response Wisely"

by Karri Thompson 

When I arrive to work in the morning, I park my car in a handicap parking spot, reach for the placard and hang it on my rear-view mirror. One morning, as I got out of my car, a fellow employee whom I have occasional contact with approached me and asked "Can I ask you a personal question?" I already knew what she was going to ask. I was armed with defense, prepared to assert my right to park in a handicap spot.

She lowered her voice and asked "Why do you park in a handicap spot every day?" What kind of an insensitive, meddlesome question was that? I thought for a moment about how I wanted to respond. I decided that my need to educate people about MS is more important than unleashing my irritation with such a nosy question.

And who better to do that with than an employee who has a reputation for gossip? Perhaps she would take the information I gave her and spread the word that I'm not a rebellious alcoholic who staggers when she walks, fumbles words when she talks, and recklessly parks her car in parking spots only reserved for the obviously disabled.

Instead, I replied matter-of-factly that I have MS. I educated her about the disease and how it affects every patient differently. My co-worker stared at me in disbelief as though a cockroach had just crawled out of my nose. Then she said those words almost every MS patient hears:

"But you look so good!"

Although I appreciate that very much, inconspicuous symptoms do make it very difficult to
justify my needs.
 
I went on to explain why I "wall-walk" at times and why I fumble with my words when I speak. She asked me some general questions about the disease process and I was happy to tell her
what I've learned about MS.
 
Several weeks have gone by and occasionally I catch her watching me walk. It does make me feel a little self-conscious at times but I know I did the right thing by setting her straight.



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