I need help

[AnnaMae7]

I am in weird mood .....feeling really blah. I don't know how to explain it ....like I don't exist. I haven't even been hanging out in chat and that is so not like me. My legs are in constant pain, nothing seems to help.


I feel like they are retracting, the one thing I don't want to happen, I feel like I have worked so long and for what.....It's so hard and I am so tired. What can I do? Therapy has stopped all together. I am trying on my own but feel like I keep taking steps backwards. I need to be with my family with my DD. She is what keeps me going. God please.... I need help.

[Wordsgood]

NO! Don't go!

Hi AnnaMae7. I just left my own intro thread where you left a kind message, which is much appreciated!

Please do NOT retract. Lot's of folks understand. I was where you are right now just days ago, and because of folks like YOU, I am feeling much stronger now.

Please just try to hang on. Remember, one moment at a time if that's what it takes. You DO count!!!!

What do you mean that therapy has stopped? Counselling or medication? And whatever the case is, please, please, please remember that you ARE important. You are NOT a nobody.

Look, I understand unrelenting pain at unbearable levels. There are times when it just doesn't seem worth the effort to keep going and you just want to give up completely. Oh believe me I have those times, rather too frequently.

But that's what's so great about places like this. It helps us all prop each up when we need it most. Especially since we all "get" what everyone is going through in a way that even our closest loved ones can't truly understand.

So hang in there. Sending you a huge Hug!

[22cyclist]

I understand how sad you must be. I am glad you reached out to us. I am going to post a link to the suicide hotline if you need it: 1-800-273-8255. I hope you do not.

MS can be an isolating disease if you let it. It is difficult for others to understand. I hope that you will reach out to us more often and also to your family and let them know what is going on with you emotionally. MS is not just a physical disease. It does affect the emotional part of the brain and that is completely normal.

I want you to know that what you are feeling is normal and most of us have felt it. It will pass just like the physical. The problem with MS is that it is so unpredictable and can be so long lasting that it can feel like you will never feel good again. Sometimes parts of you will not. However, parts of you will.

While taking time to be sad for what you have lost, keep your mind on you daughter and things that you still have so that the lows do not get so low. It takes practice but it is OK to feel sad and reach out about it. I am happy you did. We just want you to be alright.

Write back when you can.

Take care
Lisa

[Wordsgood]

See, AnnMae, within just a few hours of your post people are responding to show you how much we DO care, and how much you DO matter.

And any advice offered by Cyclist22 is to be well considered. Did you notice her signature line? She's a nurse who also happens to have MS, so we are fortunate to have someone here who understands things both as both a patient and a medical professional.

Cyclist, do you know if this forum has a Private messaging system where we can talk to each other privately? I haven't been able to find it, but was under the impression we have one.

Also, thank you for posting the suicide hotline. I think I will write it down myself for the next time I hit a really bad low and those kinds of thoughts going through my mind again.

AnnMae, I'm asking Cyclist the above because I want to offer you the chance to speak with me privately if you want to. To vent, cry on my shoulder (virtually speaking), or just have a good rant if you don't feel comfortable doing in the public forums. That is not to say I want to in anyway to not discourage you from posting on the forums. Please do continue doing so.

I just want to know if there is another way we (forum members) can privately connect with other if so desired.

Big Hgs for you both!

[22cyclist]

We no longer have PM. I can PM because I am a moderator. We stopped it because it was too much to moderate I believe. However, you can post your email in your private info for anyone to email you that you invite. That is one way to essentially PM here.

Sorry about the no PMing. I will reach out to the OP.

Lisa

[Mable]

Suicide hotline

Thanks for your post 22cyclist. I might print that out and put it on my mirror. I WILL feel better mostly? I always forget that when I'm in the worst depression.

I want to add something for Anna Mae, or anyone out there feeling extra low...I've never been ready to call myself suicidal, so for a long time, I never called those numbers. But a few times I've been so desperately depressed, I didn't know what to do. And so once I called the "crisis number" (which is really the suicide hotline). It really helped.

A woman stayed on the phone with me while I cried and cried. She had some suggestions, and eventually, I lost interest in my blues and went shopping.

I was, and this will amaze you, not the first MSer she had heard from.

[Wordsgood]

Thank you again, Cyclist. At least I now know it's not me being unable to find the PM function.

AnneMae, I really hope your feeling a little better today. If not I hope you will be soon. Please remember you are not alone.

[AnnaMae7]

Thank you both for your kind words.....I am fine, I some times think I am bi-polar with these ups and downs I have.

But I just wanted you to know I am ok.....Thank you
AnnaMae7

[hunterd]

Anna, if you ever need to talk, just send me an e mail. WELCOME TOO!!!!!