Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

I thought I would feel better this Fall

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    I thought I would feel better this Fall

    Just a rant...

    I thought when the weather got cooler here in Denver that I would feel better. This wasn't the best summer for me...I hardly went outside of my air conditioned place. I feel tired all the time now and my balance and walking issues have really gotten much worse. My neuro even gave me a handicapped placecard that I have a hard time swallowing my pride to use. My kids think it's great, but I am often too ashamed to use it. I feel like everyone is staring at me, judging me. Maybe I'm judging myself. I'm pretty hard on myself...I'm my own worst critic.

    My LP is very supportive. He tries to go to every doctor visit, and I've had alot lately. I just feel like sometimes no one truely "gets it" because I look still pretty normal. Sometimes I have a hard time walking when I first get up and start moving especially (I wiggle my legs and say to myself "go, go Gadget legs!) but other than that there is no physical malady that is evident. So everyone assumes I'm fine. My family hasn't taken much interest in how I'm feeling, no one but my LP even asks. And sometimes my son which then makes me feel even more guilty. I'm trying so hard to hide what I'm feeling but it's getting harder to do that. I have always been the strong one, and have a lot of what I now consider to be foolish pride. But I can't get rid of it. And I'm stubborn so you can't try to help me if I don't want the help, which is usually.

    Thanks for listening. Does anyone ever feel like this? I feel like I'm coming apart at the seams.
    Do you need or enjoy fear, worries and restlessness? If you don't, then why do you keep inviting them into your mind?

    #2
    I have learned to let go and for me let G-d.
    I ran my own business, raised two children-for awhile single mother-was the one EVERYONE turned to. I was dx at 40; 63 now. Learned letting pride get in my way was not the way.
    I live alone now (wasn't by choice, but am better off). I ask for help when I need to, I accept offered help when I need to...have learned people like helping and when I don't need the help I make sure to let them know I appreciate their kind offer.
    I have been on Tysabri for 6 years and am very grateful to this med !!

    I love your pic

    Good luck and best wishes
    Linda

    Comment


      #3
      Thanks Linda, I appreciate your kind and thoughtful words. I'm feeling better today...it may just be the pressure of preparing Thanksgiving dinner for twelve people!
      Do you need or enjoy fear, worries and restlessness? If you don't, then why do you keep inviting them into your mind?

      Comment


        #4
        Believe it or not, MS tends to flair in the fall and in the spring. The summer is just a bonus because of the heat. The winter we have trouble because of sick people giving us their germs.

        I am sorry you are still having a hard time, but welcome to the site!

        Keep coming back whether you feel well or not!

        Feel better soon
        Lisa
        Disabled RN with MS for 14 years
        SPMS EDSS 7.5 Wheelchair (but a racing one)
        Tysabri

        Comment

        Working...
        X