***Is Anyone As MAD As I Am?***

[JerryD]

I am angry and have nearly ruined my relationship with my wife because of it . I realized that that's no way to live and i will not do that to the woman I love !! So, no matter what it takes... I will get my attitude adjusted. I take an anti-depressant for my attitude. And I am also actively researching natural remedies that have a positive effect on personality.
If you need to vent on this site, we are here to lend our support. Try to work your way around the angry. i knows how hard it is. Good luck.

[sparkle13]

Believe me, I understand about being angry. I was diagnosed a year ago this Sunday. I haven't gotten over being angry and I'm not sure when or if I will. I, too, was told that I've had it the past 5-10 years because I had so many lesions on my MRI. I understand about being angry that it wasn't picked up sooner. Contrary to what some people may think, it is totally ok to be angry. Just don't let the anger take over your whole life. Easier said than done but that anger will eat at you, causing more problems.

[mjan]

Sorry I copied my list twice accidentally. Evidently, I am so blessed I have to say it twice.

Hahaha.. sorry, I thought that was a "test" for us !
Loved your list. You can use anger to motivate one to make changes ...

Thank you for sharing all that~cont blessings

Jan

[LisaL77]

Hahaha.. sorry, I thought that was a "test" for us !
Loved your list. You can use anger to motivate one to make changes ...

Thank you for sharing all that~cont blessings

Jan

I still can't believe I did that.

[babygurl]

I am

Hi Apple,

I too am suffering fom bipolar disorder and then I was diagnosed with MS?!?! i have cried for 5 days now and I am so depressed. I don't want to do anything, somtimes it feels like nobody understands. My boyfriend wants to move back to where we used to live in a different city altogether and start new. I think I would like that but then think of things like who in the orld wants to be frids with a 30 year old who is too tired to do anything or doesn't commit to things because I am not sure if I will be up to it on the day of the event? I have been so negative for the last few days its not healthy for me. I jyst want to lie and bed and wallow in self pitty. It's sad really. and on top of it all my best friend has just closed the door in my face deciding that he no longer wants to be my friend because apparently my life is tooo demanding and its carrying over on him! I'm very angry, depressed and cynical right now. And my kids have to deal with me! Poor them!!!!! It's not easy to feel alone like nobody understands! i have had advise about getting togther with people that have the disease and I have thought about it but I don't need a constant reminder that I am sick with this disease! I would rather do what I have to do and look beyond the disease!

[salamandertom]

Apple,
I was angry for the first year, REALLY, REALLY angry after my diagnosis. Mine came out of nowhere, but I don't think that it matters honestly if you were suspicious or were diagnosed out of the blue. I think that the reactions to the diagnosis are similar. Anger, resentment, regret, bitterness, I know I felt all those things. I felt like my life and my dreams had been stolen from me. And they were. I mourned them with anger for a long time, then I started to think about new dreams and it started getting better. Acceptance doesn't always come, and for some it comes quickly. Since I have accepted my disease, and how disruptive it is - life has been easier. I still have long moments of regret and anger, but I am now, 18 months after diagnosis not as angry.

I hope that this comes for you some day. But while you are experiencing the anger I encourage you to share your thoughts with the people you love. This disease is ugly, and it affects the people we love too. Telling them how you feel will help I think. HUGS, and don't let anyone make you feel like you shouldn't be angry. What happened to you is not fair, and it stinks. HUGS

[BeneathTheLies]

I cannot relate to you a 100% but I can relate to the anger. Everyday I feel anger at what has happened. I'm 22 years old and I struggle to find the silver lining in my future. I'm just angry that I'm so young and have to deal with this. I see a therapist now which has helped but I can't help but be angry. In this life I have realized that this is my burden to bear but it doesn't make it any easier to handle. I know at times my angry boils over into other aspects of my life and it's unhealthy. I hope to one day find peace about this whole situation but until then when things get overwhelming and I feel like screaming, I go for a drive and scream bloody murder. Makes me feel a little better to release the tension. Lord help me if anyone ever hears me. lol

[Apple-]

Wow Beneath you are soooo young. I was 29 when I was diagnosed just know our thoughts are with you...

[BeneathTheLies]

Thanks Apple. It's hard but that's life. I'm sending you well wishes too.

[Tishm1]

I am not angry over my dx.

Guess not angry because I was dx years ago and have been grateful to my physicians and family for standing up for me. Don't get me wrong life isn't always easy. I have many days not having any energy! Get up and drag self to work.

I have been on all the shots you can name and have been left feeling worse. So stopped the shots and infusions. Now suppose to start Tecfidera! After reading post am thinking should call doc and ask if can stay on lowest dose since if there is a side effect usually sure to have it.

I have been doing nothing but Vit D and Vit B12 plus medical marijuana! Plus meds for symptom management. Guess should be angry that they have thrown the above out the window for research when it appears natural methods like those above along with acupuncture and Massage. My insurance won't pay for acupuncture or massage! So had to come up with money myself. And of course won't pay for vitamins. And the other has been approved for research at university hospitals except they are afraid to do it because of federal laws.

I guess what I am trying to say is I am fed up with the pharmaceutical companies hold over these decisions. But since I am unwilling to let anger eat my insides out have to let it go! Something I have learned over and over again. Letting go!

For me being dx with MS was a wake-up call for me. You see I was in a really bad marriage that was very stressful. My body responds to stress by causing my symptoms to become worse. And eventually leads to an exacerbation! So what I have learned is to limit high levels of stress!

** Moderator's note - Post broken into paragraphs for easier reading. Many people with MS have visual difficulties that prevent them from reading large blocks of print. **

[Robinsnesth]

If I am diagnosed next month, as I fully expect to be, it will be 7 years for me also since I was diagnosed "Probable Benign MS" I anticipate that I will also be angry at missing 7 years of potential medication that may have (or not) prevented this latest 6 month flare.

That being said, the anger won't last long. One thing I realize is that the past can never be undone so my energy needs to be focused on the future. With 4 kids, 8 grandkid's and a dog who is much more interested in world domination than fetching silly sticks, I can't waste time dwelling on the what ifs and might have been's and instead need concentrate on the what will be's

[Marie12]

Jesus does want us to ask for help

You all help me so much. I think you have been the hard workers and helpers of society. And I do think that Jesus has picked us, and does want us to have help.

It isn't easy for me to ask for help. I have no experience, but I am now learning to ask for help. We are now remodeling the house, so the shower will now have a seat, and the bath will be closer to my bed and fridge.

So, for the first time in my lifetime, I'm going to relax and eat. I've learned a lot while I've been sick. I know that Jesus is having me help people, even though I am sick. They don't even realize that I am helping them with Jesus.

My brother calls on the phone, and acting like he is talking to me, says on the message that he is glad I'm feeling fine. I have primary progressive ms. I have explained to my entire family, what that entails.

So, I just distance myself from this evil, and stay with my immediate family. They do understand. We were reorganizing things, to make way for the carpenters. I did realize that if I didn't require a wheelchair, I would be doing this all by myself.

I do hate to view my husband doing all the work. But I do remind myself, that years ago, this was reversed. I would be doing everything.

It is difficult to be handicapped. But all of you need to remember that Jesus loves us. And in Jesus's eyes, he sees who we truly are. And my goodness, how can I complain about having MS when I realize what Jesus did for us to open the gates of Heaven.

Just remember all, that when we meet in Heaven, we will be in no pain, and we will all be running, smart, etc.

It's true, that day is coming. Heaven is there for us.

[msastros]

Sometimes....

I don't know if its as much frustration as anger. When things seem overwhelming I get frustrated that I can't handle situations that I once could handle.

I have regrets that I did not start the dmd sooner, I chose not to have children, I married then divorced a jerk,

Thank goodness for antidepressants and my psychologist.

I hope you get help about your anger. Let it out and move on. Do what you can,

[Thinkimjob]

Well, not angry, just plain annoyed.

You can try as hard as you like, whistle a merry tune, grab a rainbow etc, but at some point there's no more bunging on the act.

I did it for years. "I'm fine, I'm fine, no really, I'm fine, just stubbed my toe." Nope, not fine, royally stuffed, actually.

I wonder whether, in retrospect, I would have chased earlier and or better treatment if I hadn't been so grimly determined to carry on as if I didn't have a bloody awful progressive neurological disease.

The whole thing sucks. Try not to lose your sense of humour, - that's as good as its going to get.

[KatieAgain]

Angry...sort of I guess. I dislike MS with every fiber of my being. And I have had it a long time. I will never accept it, but I have learned to live with it...if that makes sense???