Final Teaching Internship and disclosure?

[mtfbwy72]

I am going through the process of finding out if I have MS.....I have symptoms and lesions on the brain and see the Neuro next Mon....I am hoping to have an answer by end of August when I start my final teaching internship. My question to you wise ladies is, do I disclose to my supervisor or cooperating teacher if I have problems during internship or keep my mouth shut so I dont jeopardize my chances of getting a job when I graduate?

I am stressing because one of my symptoms is cognitive functioning issues. I know my stuff and can totally fake it till I make it but I also don't want people thinking I am scatter brained without an explanation if I can't fake it and cover up the scatterbrain-ness.

I am probably putting the horse before the cart but I am already having trouble studying for one of my certification exams (subject area). Nothing is sticking in my head.

[CGMoonbeam]

That's tough, especially since you're just starting out. Cognitive issues have such a stigma.

I believe that I've suffered with MS since HS, but wasn't diagnosed until I was in my 40s.

I disclosed right away because a student asked me if I was drunk and I thought it better that my principal knew that I was ill rather than believed I was chemically impaired. It was fortunate that it was after an evaluation that went very well, so he knew that I could do the job.

I would play it by ear. You don't have to disclose, but if your symptoms become obvious, you don't want people making assumptions. It's a lot to consider. Teaching is difficult enough without MS.

[nabean]

This is a tough choice to make. As moonbeam suggested, I would play it by ear. I made the choice to disclose to my last school because of the circumstances under which I had been dx.

But my experience at a new school where no one knows has been great, because when people ask how you are doing they don't have that kind of sad pity in their voice. They are really just being polite

It is a big choice...think about it. maybe even make a pros and cons list...Once you say the words you can't take them back.

Big choice. I have two experiences at two different schools and I have to say that for me it was dependent on the circumstances. I had reasons to disclose at my first school and because I had senority and a contract, disclosing made it so that HR did things to help me deal with my MS. But now at my new school there hasn't been any reason to tell anyone anything and I haven't.

good luck with your internship and don't rush your decision.

[mtfbwy72]

Thanks ladies. I am definitely going to play it by ear. Need to tackle the subject area exam first and if I have to put off internship then I will.....symptoms have progressed to my legs this week. That Neuro appt can't come soon enough.

I have confided in one friend/classmate and swore her to secrecy. I think we are going to study for the exam together which might help or I will enlist the help of my super smart hubby.

I think I have pretty much decided not to tell anyone unless absolutely necessary.

[sherill]

Originally Posted by mtfbwy72

I am stressing because one of my symptoms is cognitive functioning issues. I know my stuff and can totally fake it till I make it but I also don't want people thinking I am scatter brained without an explanation if I can't fake it and cover up the scatterbrain-ness.

First, MOST of the time, if not all, you are the only one that recognizes the "scatterbrain-ness." Once I had heard that, I would ask a friend if s/he noticed my confusion and mostly they would say no. Everyone gets nervous, forgets, can't find words to some degree - only you know to what degree that is inside of your own head. Explanations can be counter-productive if the other person didn't think anything unusual about the way you presented yourself.

You'll learn coping skills to cover the gaps. I have to ask quite a bit what someone just told me or to be reminded of things I know I should know... The trick there is to ask to be reminded of something without sounding like you're accusing someone of never having told you in the first place.

You can also just be honest about limitations without disclosing the MS - "I tend to have a poor memory for names, please don't take it personally if I need you to remind me of your name a few times," etc. Also, "help me remember..." works well too!

If I were you, I'd get a neuropsych evaluation to establish a baseline for your cog issues. That can help you know more about where the gaps lie. Depression can also play a major role in the cog issues too, so your cog fog may be better at some times than others.

Then, personally, I'd start by just telling the school nurse, so in case something happens that s/he needs to be involved in, s/he has that information - maybe even give the nurse some reading materials regarding sx that you're concerned with.

Don't let fear of the unknown stop you from at least trying! Trust your study habits as you study for the exam - habits kick in when the brain won't.... that's why they're called "habits."

sherill

[woodstock]

My advice would be to consider saying things on a need to know basis. As Sherill said, I discovered that no one really noticed my cognitive symptoms though they appeared to be glaring to me. I was dx this time last summer just as I entered my 4th year and got tenure. Had I not been tenured, I probably would have thought twice about revealing my MS.

That said, my advice to anyone starting at a new school district would be to make sure to take advantage of any reasonably priced short term and long term disability insurance and any life insurance if you can get it without having to worry about pre-existing conditions. Typically you can only get this when you start at a place or on rare occasions when the insurance companies (with us through the union) run enrollment periods where folks with pre-existing conditions can join. I had these benefits at my last employer and never thought I'd need them so I didn't sign up for them here. Hindsight being 20/20, I really wish I had. Now, without an open enrollment period, I don't qualify for short/long term disability or long term care insurance.