30 things that I love about having Multiple Sclerosis...

[TechDad]

1. Vertigo and Vestibular Ataxia - I get to pretend that I am on a Trans-Atlantic sea cruise every day...plus I like wearing Hawaiian shirts.
2. Disabling Fatigue - I get to take naps and snuggle with my 3 year old son.
3. Insomnia – I get to listen to the National Anthem once the infomercials have ended....life can stick me with a crippling disease but it can not stop my patriotism.
4. Heat Intolerance - I get to drink all the Peanut Butter Espresso Chocolate Ice Cream Shakes I want.
5. Nausea and Vomiting - I can drink all the Peanut Butter Espresso Chocolate Ice Cream Shakes I want with no weight gain.
6. Short-term Memory Loss - I get to walk into the same room over and over several times until I remember why I went in there to begin with...it is a great excuse to just go make another Peanut Butter Espresso Chocolate Ice Cream Shake.
7. Delayed Verbal Processing – Nothing stops you from putting your foot in your mouth faster than being unable to think of what you were just about to say...several times in a row.
8. Cognitive Dysfunction - When I put my cell phone in the refrigerator, my car keys in the microwave, and the milk in the dishwasher I am always pleasantly surprised when I find them.
9. Respiratory Dysfunction - I can get out of bed and feel like I just completed my old work out routine...all without sweating!
10. Uhthoff's Syndrome - I'll get to wear kick-** self contained water cooled clothing like an INDY500 driver when I go outside in the heat.
11. Dysdiadochokinesia - I now have a REAL excuse for not being able to play guitar like Dimebag Darrell.
12. Speech Ataxia - I never know what funky new words I may create when I talk. I believe this is how "jive talking" and Esperanto started.
13. Paraesthesia - It reminds me of when I was 10 years old at summer camp when I stuffed my socks full of Pop Rocks on a dare.
14. Dysarthria - I can now do great Bob Dylan impressions!
15. Footdrop - It makes it really easy to plant even rows of seed for gardening.
16. Diplopia - Getting to see my beautiful wife and son twice at the same time is awesome.
17. Optic Neuritis - The ugly people on my High Def TV are finally blurry! W00H000!!!!
18. Dysmetria – You get to figure out brand new innovative ways to do simple things like cutting vegetables or frying bacon....or putting on pants while frying bacon.
19. Muscle Paresis - I will no longer feel obligated to help friends if they ever need to move a couch up a flight of stairs or bury a body in the Meadowlands.
20. Muscle Spasticity - Gym membership? Ha! Look at these quads!
21. Sexual Dysfunction - It is so much cheaper than condoms.
22. Bladder Spasticity - You will always know where all the rest rooms are located.
23. Night Blindness - Driving at night and walking the dogs in the dark is more exciting now!
24. Dysphagia - You get to take your time and enjoy the taste in every bite of your meals before you swallow...sometimes for an hour!
25. Dystonia - I was never a fan of typing words correctly anyway...just ask my online chat buddies.
26. Gate Ataxia - I have an excuse to finally buy the same cane as my favorite antisocial TV character, Dr. House...we are so alike now that it is frightening.
27. Unpredictable Flare-Ups – You finally learn to take and plan for just one day at a time because no one knows what tomorrow brings...or if you will even be able to get out of bed.
28. Clumsiness – I used to just be good to look at but now I am much more fun to watch.
29. Hot and Cold Flashes – I get to be secure in my masculinity knowing that while I may never be able to know the joys of child birth...I can however share in the experience of menopause.
30. Likelihood I will be stuck in a motorized wheel chair eventually – I have another reason to keep working on designing the first ever “low-rider” turbo charged Rascal Scooter for street racing and an Arduino based 4 axis motion controlled multiphase exoskeleton with death ray for use with the idiots who park in handicapped spots.

Hope I made at least one of my fellow MSers smile

[poohb3ar]

you not only got me to but i'm shaking all over to keep the giggles in and not wake up my husband!

very clever! i can definitely relate to many of those!

take care & God bless ya!

keep up your sense of humor!

oh, i want to put in my order for the turbo charged low rider and can you make it in hot pink please! the check for it is in the mail!

[LisaL77]

Very funny!

[Thomas Jackson]

Well Done , #10 , my favorite.

[502E79]

TechDad,

Dave Barry has nothing on you!

Thanks for the smiles.

Jer

[Seasha]

What a hoot!

I love #15 - I'm a gardener and my cane makes nice little holes for the seeds

You made my day, TechDad and thanks!!!

[Nanobaby]

Re: #6

Ever hear that song, Call Me, Maybe? by Carly Rae Jepsen?

"Hey this is crazy, I just met you..." five minutes later "Hey this is crazy, I just me you"

[bluemanda]

Thanks for that. It made my long day better. Thank you for sharing. :-)

[mercadies25]

ABSOLUTELY AWESOME!!!!

thanxs a bunch. this is the way that sx should be explained.

lmao

[apple19]

Wow!!! That was really funny.

[iadopted3]

Thank you for the laugh today. I cannot wait to show my husband this when he gets home this evening. Hopefully he will see the humor as well, seeing as I am the one with MS, newly diagnosed and trying to figure this whole thing out and realizing that I won't be able to figure it out. lol

Thanks. And I agree, Dave Berry has nothing on you.

[journeyman]

I'm a husband and father of two grown children.

You made me laugh so hard.

I bet it is a trip to be married to you and share a house with you. What a positive soul you have.

My wife's misfortune is that she teaches High School foreign languages. When she gets home all she want is a power nap and silence.

I however-as I approach a relapse I start talking more and faster then I stop punctuating and start in mid-sentence chaning subjects. (I grew up ADHD) Pretty soon I stop comprehending and start making up my own words. She just runs from me. (I think as a language teacher I would be a great), What a persistant and great love she is.

She finally gets a rest when my relapse takes away my ability to talk at all. I become silent for a month one of my curses from MS.I just sit and suffer at the humor of MS. Ahhh but then I just wake up one day and the relapse is over and I am back to MY normal and the cycle starts over.
Dave: Tampa Florida
"journeyman"

[MtnHigh]

That was great... can't wait to share with my husband.. thanks for the laughs

[WillyNilly]

Another order for that turbo-charged low rider here please!! I'd like a hydrolic lift on demand and 4WD though, for those lovely places without curb cuts and chasing the youngsters through the forrest and fishing- oops, might need "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang" style floatys too...ok, ok, we'll just start with the low rider.
And just by chance, do you LOVE Peanut Butter Espresso Chocolate Ice Cream Shakes ??

[CasinoKathy]

I can't think of a dam thing I like about ms!!!! Sorry to be the one that breaks the good thoughts here, but just telling it the way it is. I don't have a life like most people do, my life as I knew it is gone, ka-put!! Without balance, there is not much I can do.

I try to keep a positive attitude, but I finally admitted to myself that I am not going to get better. Just face the facts, unless the experts can come up to reverse the damage..... well, enough said