Intimacy issues

[lynnepynne]

Sex or walking.
Choose one.
This seems to be my problem with being intimate with my partner. This is kind of embarrassing to talk about but as I am here "with the girls" I am just gonna say it:
If my partner and I are, ahem, intimate, even if I am not very active at all (lucky me ) I may get spasms in my legs or loose feeling during AND I get completely fatigued (weak, wobbly, shaky, vibrating) legs after.

Since I was thinking lately I might be going into a flare or whatever for the past weeks (as I have had a marked increase of most of my usual stuff/symptoms/crap including lots of spasticity. Like if I do anything I feel like I was run over by a truck while my muscles get stiffer and I get slower and slower )

So my partner being extra special nice to me basically means that for the rest of the day I would actually need to rest to "recover" (which of course is not possible and so I drag my limp footed, spastic legged, tired, snail paced person to work, the store etc.)

It just all seems wildly out of proportion with this kind of activity. Since I can't walk any distance without my cane and I am struggling anyway, but c'mon I was just laying there doing virtually nothing!!!

Plus it seems kinda mean. Puts me off of sex because the consequences are just too high...

Anybody else know what I'm talking about?
Lynne

[Sara Angela]

Sorry, you are having trouble! I wonder if taking a Baclofen before sex might help? My husband has ED problems, so we haven't had sex in a while...

Sara

[lynnepynne]

Thanks Sara for your help!
I am definitely going to the dr. this week anyway for baclofen (although I can't decide which is worse: the spasticity or the weakness. I am afraid baclofen will make me even more tired and weaker and might take away the support I am getting through the spasticity. Hmmmm...)
I guess some things you just have to accept and move on. This whatever-illness-I-have (I am undiagnosed) has taken so much already, guess my sex life is just the next new thing. But I will just hope it will come and go...
Best,
Lynne

[lh3lm3]

Lynne - thanks for sharing your experience. So often people are not willing to discuss how symptoms affect their sex life.

There are times when I experience L'Hermittes, numbness, pain, and/or fatigue during sex - it can really take away from the moment (or, like you said, the entire day).

My husband and I have tried new positions that are more comfortable or require less energy from me and that helps some.

Good luck at the doctor - I hope you find out information that will help you feel inspired and strong.

Warmly,
Lisa

[lynnepynne]

Thank you Lisa!
It helps me a lot that you relate and answered

yes, I bet your right: a lot of folks may not feel comfortable talking about their symptoms and sex life.

I think in general I am just sad and feeling so limited because having physical problems is hard enough on a relationship and sexuality is such an important part of of maintaining intimacy.

I am hoping when this phase of fatigue and spasticity moves on things will get better too. (and until then I will be at least trying to get relief with baclofen)

I hope you find out information that will help you feel inspired and strong.

Thanks!!!
Lynne

[lh3lm3]

Hi Lynne. I hope the Baclofen helps - please do keep us posted.
Warmly,
Lisa