I'm sure there are some others out here who are both patient and caregiver. I'm beginning to need some encouragement.
My husband has some serious illnesses. He's been fairly okay until lately. His mind is muddy, forgetful, repetitive, very negative and depressed.
He has non alcoholic cirrhosis brought on by Agent Orange during VietNam. He is a bad diabetic, heart problems, has had skin cancer, bladder cancer and all the mess that goes along with this stuff.
I left him asleep this morning for just a little while. When I got home he was still in bed, but I found evidence that he had been up and had a problem in the bathroom. So I cleaned that up. He takes Lactulose to try to control his Ammonia levels which are high. He slept for a long time so I knew he must have taken an Ambien last night. When he woke up he was very slow, very unsteady. He decided to take a shower and went into the bathroom where he fell flat on his face. I am assuming the Ambien was still working. He won't tell me what made him fall. But I can guess.
Anyway, it's things like this that are creeping up now. I have to do all the driving, which is difficult for me at times. I have put all my health issues on the back burner... pretty much ignored. Afraid to take nighttime meds in case I don't hear him calling for me. Afraid to take meds during the day in case I have to drive to the hospital. So of course, my anxiety levels and pain levels are out of this world.
I know if I really need help our son is close and will help if he is available. We have good neighbors, but I really hate to ask for help. Some days Sam is in better shape. This falling stuff just started. I've already hidden the Ambiens and some other prescriptions. This way I can monitor them.
I just need to hear from people who are in the position of being a patient who needs a little help sometimes and also are caregivers. Being a caregiver is harder than being a patient right now. Where do you turn? How do you take care of your own symptoms? How do you face the future with an aging spouse who needs more help, but won't admit it?
I feel so selfish when he decides he just wants to talk (ramble is more like it). I turn it off and lose myself in a book. He really doesn't want a lot of conversation, just wants to tell me every detail of what he heard on the news, in a tv show, what he's read and his past stories that I've heard over and over. I'm a terrible wife.
My husband has some serious illnesses. He's been fairly okay until lately. His mind is muddy, forgetful, repetitive, very negative and depressed.
He has non alcoholic cirrhosis brought on by Agent Orange during VietNam. He is a bad diabetic, heart problems, has had skin cancer, bladder cancer and all the mess that goes along with this stuff.
I left him asleep this morning for just a little while. When I got home he was still in bed, but I found evidence that he had been up and had a problem in the bathroom. So I cleaned that up. He takes Lactulose to try to control his Ammonia levels which are high. He slept for a long time so I knew he must have taken an Ambien last night. When he woke up he was very slow, very unsteady. He decided to take a shower and went into the bathroom where he fell flat on his face. I am assuming the Ambien was still working. He won't tell me what made him fall. But I can guess.
Anyway, it's things like this that are creeping up now. I have to do all the driving, which is difficult for me at times. I have put all my health issues on the back burner... pretty much ignored. Afraid to take nighttime meds in case I don't hear him calling for me. Afraid to take meds during the day in case I have to drive to the hospital. So of course, my anxiety levels and pain levels are out of this world.
I know if I really need help our son is close and will help if he is available. We have good neighbors, but I really hate to ask for help. Some days Sam is in better shape. This falling stuff just started. I've already hidden the Ambiens and some other prescriptions. This way I can monitor them.
I just need to hear from people who are in the position of being a patient who needs a little help sometimes and also are caregivers. Being a caregiver is harder than being a patient right now. Where do you turn? How do you take care of your own symptoms? How do you face the future with an aging spouse who needs more help, but won't admit it?
I feel so selfish when he decides he just wants to talk (ramble is more like it). I turn it off and lose myself in a book. He really doesn't want a lot of conversation, just wants to tell me every detail of what he heard on the news, in a tv show, what he's read and his past stories that I've heard over and over. I'm a terrible wife.
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