HS reunion tonight

[dyin_myelin]

I've been looking forward to this for awhile. I didn't go. I read it's humid in FL, so probably just as well. The photos are starting to accumulate on FB. I was going to have a dress designed, I was looking forward to seeing the people I've been missing.

The person in a wc is smiling, laughing, drinking in the photos. People bend down and they all smile. Why do I feel ashamed to be sick, like I did something wrong. I worried I would fall or slur a word and then have to say what was wrong or have people think I was drunk. And if I said what was wrong I would probably start to cry and ruin things, if not for others with the misfortune of being around me then at least myself.

I know maybe none of those things would happen. But, they may. Or they may guffaw and comment on how healthy I've always eaten, which has happened up here, like it's some ironic universe joke. Or, what if someone asks if I'm pregnant? I smashed a bunch of dishes because I have told hulu FIFTY times the clearblue easy pee stick ad is NOT relevant to me.

[Chowda]

Only advice I can offer is there are too many 'what ifs' on your mind, I'm the same way, I'm trying to end my reclusiveness.

These arguments on your mind are logical fallacies, they will cause anxiety. Trust me, exercise pragmatism. Don't believe anything until you have proof. But don't go too far and become hyper-skeptical.

This is all from my own personal experience, I have an anxiety disorder This can turn in to a very toxic mentality which results in a downward spiral in your mental health. I've become very misanthropic

[Jules A]

Although I'm so glad you continue to vent her with us I'm concerned that your posts keep sounding more distraught especially if you actually "smashed a bunch of dishes" because someone mistakenly thought you were pregnant.

Have you been able to check into therapy for support and coping skills? Maybe take the money you earmarked for the designer dress and invest in your piece of mind?

I'm so sorry you are in such pain and hope you are able to feel better soon.

[KatieAgain]

Dyin...what's wrong Darlin'? You purposely missed your High School Reunion? Something that you were looking forward too?

That's like me purposely missing my plane this Fall to go to Europe.

Your sabotaging yourself. It is indeed humid here in Florida...that's why we have A/C. Not an excuse.

Why do you feel ashamed to have MS? Why do you feel ashamed for not being pregnant? That you will need to work out with a professional.

You have obviously been doing some great things with you life. No one has it all...no one.

Girl...you need a bucket list. If you need ideas for a Bucket List...JulesA started a great thread about one not too long ago.

Start living in the present...enjoy each day as they come. Stop researching about all the negative side effects of DMDs which is a waste of valuable time and so is Facebook IMHO, and instead use that time for something more enjoyable.

Have you ever been bungee jumping? Awesome......Awesome!!!! Seriously, I have done it twice.

What about White Water Rafting? I've done that too...West Virginia has some of the best rapids in the States. Thought I was going to die on a Class V rapid at the New River...but so worth it. One of the coolest things I ever did.

Have you gone to the Smithsonian and seen The First
Ladies exhibit or visited The Holocaust Museum across the street.

Have you been to Broadway?

So many things to do...time goes fast. And with MS it goes faster. Stop worrying about dying and start living.

Start your bucket list now...dont wait until later...I have already been through a few lists. I have done some things not for the feint of heart. Made for some great stories and memories.