I don't want to go.

[mercadies25]

My dh thinks that I want to go places, basketball games, concerts, hockey games, visiting friends and family out to dinner etc....

Although in the old days you couldn't keep me in for more than to take a shower and a quick nap, these days I just don't want to go anymore anywhere.

It is exhausting to even get ready much less actually go. I try to be excited and put a smile on my face but in actuality I just would like to say leave me alone. If we drive up and I see steps I cringe. then we have to find ways around those dreadful steps.

At football games etc... we have to get special permission to use all the elevators then people around me are always in a hurry.

I love all these events but feel like it's more trouble than it's worth. When we finally get home sleep for 2 days is a must.

Just venting, thanks for listening.

Have a great relaxing day!!

[marti]

I am an absolute couch potato. I want to stay home and be left alone. I love my family, but a little goes a long way. I've developed an anxious personality and the noise, commotion, work etc all make me crazy.

Just give me a book or my old tv dvd's or a movie (sometimes) and I'm happy.

Luckily my husband is sick too and he prefers to stay in also. Although this winter has been hard on him. I know we both feel a little better when we can get out on the deck for a little while. Sunshine is needed!!

[Tawanda]

A lot of us our probably on board with your post. Who wants to be a wet blanket, but who WANTS to feel like MS makes us feel? I pretty much feel like poop everyday, but when I pass up a potentially enjoyable opportunity, I feel like MS gets a point.

It is a balance act for sure and a lot of time the stupid disease does win. If MS didn't keep us from doing what we love, it wouldn't be the devastating disease that it is. This disease earns it's evil reputation for sure.

[AnneLouise]

I know exactly what you're saying. No problem back in the day! Steps are just horrible and I have no balance to boot.

My hubby has seen my ability to negotiate steps decline to the point where I struggle with a one inch step. And if there isn't something to hang onto, forget it.

We no longer go places with steps if we can. Some places are just too confusing. But you have get ready first. I get ready early and give myself a little break, if possible.

My husband will go lengths to park in handicap spots, find elevators, ramps, whatever. It is so much easier for him wheel me to certain events. Riding in chair is not a fun thing, and I do a lot of 'sucking it up', but it has been worth it. Well, most times.

[Cat Mom]

I hear ya! When I choose to stay home and miss out, I wish I was able to go... but when I decide to suck it up and go, I get there and wish I'd stayed home! Go figure!

Jen

[poppydarling]

Oh, I'm right there with you! And because my MS worsened right as I turned 50, I don't know if my lack of enthusiasm is due to "been there, done that, don't care" middle age, or a mild depression over my health. I do know that when I push myself and do Polyanna talk (Try--it might be fun, you need to get out, etc.) it makes me feel bad about myself when I "fail" to manage it.

So I wait until something makes me jump up--or an approximation of that old familiar movement -- and struggle to shower, dress and arrange a ride, because I know whatever is spurring me on, even with fatigue, will probably be worth it. Usually it's a good sale or a Panera salad with a friend

Mostly, though, I've learned to appreciate a quiet life lived mostly at home with my garden and animals, and everyday small moments of contentment and joy, and it's really enough when you think about it.

[Strhuntrss]

Jen,

You couldn't have said it any better