Does anyone else get this feeling?

[PositiveMS]

I've had MS for about 15 years, although after my initial optic neuritis at 18, I didn't see any symptoms until I turned 31, two years ago. Now I use a cane, and am off work on short term disability due to a really bad flare. Anyway, I sometimes, no often, feel like it's all a big mistake, like somebody is going to jump out from behind a bush and shout, "Just kidding! Here's the cure". And then this MS thing can fade into the past where it belongs. And I can rejoin my sports teams
I'm not sure if this is hope, or denial that I'm experiencing. Either way, it's not a bad thing because I do deal with this crazy reality, I accept it, but it makes me smile ear to ear when I imagine what it will feel like to be able to run again.

[loopey]

I let my mind play all kinds of tricks on me to help me cope. I haven't had the "this is all a mistake" thoughts but I think it would be nice to imagine a future where I am as I was and not scared and worried all the time.

[BlessedWyoMom]

We are close in both time diagnosed and age, if I can do math right. I was diagnosed 15 years ago this past July at 20 years old. I did so well for so long that I started to wonder if I would go in for a routine appointment, have an MRI and be told that I, in fact, did not have MS and was diagnosed in error.

Well, that never happened and the last three years have been difficult, but have even more so in the past 3 months. I am learning to live with a "new normal" it seems like every month.

I have had that thought and think it is okay as long you truly are dealing with things and not just ignoring them and hoping they will go away.

[PositiveMS]

You're right. Our MS history seems to be very similar. I made it 11 years after diagnosis without seeing anything at all. I thought they had made a mistake in my diagnosis. Seems like you did too. The new normal thing, I get it. You have to adapt to new levels of what you can and can't handle to do. You have to look for restaurants that don't have stairs. Spontaneous outings are a thing of the past. High heels? Forget it! The feeling I get is that there will be a breakthrough, someone will discover the cause of MS and then a cure to stop disease activity in all of us. It's not a false hope, it will happen. It's just a long wait.

[Thinkimjob]

Oh how I hope so. And then something to repair the damage. I try not to think about it too much, because I want it, for all of us, so badly it hurts.