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    Stupid things people have said to you/asked you

    I'm trying to compile a list of things to never say to somebody with MS. (Just for a fun blog entry.) Most of it is out of love, I know.... But it gets obnoxious.

    So far some of my own:

    "How is your MS doing?" It's doing great! Causing hell and havoc.

    "Are you feeling better yet?"

    "Is your medication working yet?"

    "Well I know _______ and they have MS and are fine."

    "Well I know _______ and they had MS and were bedridden within months."
    Diagnosed Aug. 2011 - Currently on Tysabri

    #2
    "My plumber has MS and hes in remission"

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      #3
      Not quite what you seem to be looking for however:

      One day I was loading groceries in my car. A lady, seeming of normal intelligence nicely asked for my scooter when I got done loading.

      Mind you it looks NOTHING like or close to any store scooter, I got the impression she was trying to see if she could take advantage of someone (me) to get my scooter for herself, family member, friend or whatever???

      I politely informed her it was MY personal scooter and I needed it, thought it was obvious. It was a WEIRD encounter far different than any other. Usually any encounters are helpful if anything.

      Gomer Sir Falls-a-lot

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        #4
        i love this idea!

        this is not quite a quote, but to me it was offensive..

        my friend's wife and i were talking about weight issues, which lead to stress playing a factor. i told her i only have weight issues with my stomach area, which is supposedly caused by stress. she asked what i was stressed about, and i answered, "im really only stressed over my health." she relpied, "what health problems?" and i said, "you know i have ms, right?" she answered, "well yeah but..?" and looked at me blankly. all i replied with was, "living with ms is hell. i have tons of problems from it." then changed the subject.

        i realize most people have never dealt with ms in any way, but be a bit more sensitive! if you dont know anything about a disease dont assume because someone doesnt look sick they feel fine. its just frustrating.

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          #5
          I once had a doc tell me that I had urine in my blood! I was totally shocked and confused for about a nano-second until I realized it wasn't exactly what he intended to say. We both broke up laughing, with a case of the giggles for the rest of the OV.

          I don't judge lay people. MS is a hard disease to understand so I say as little as possible to very few people.

          By far the most inaccurate, and some of the curelest things said to me came from docs and non-MS neuros when I was sick but not yet diagnoised.

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            #6
            I asked my dad why he didn't call to check on me. Most parents that I know can't go a week without hearing from their kids, let alone when they have a chronic illness. He told me that it was too depressing to call. Worse yet, I often have people make excuses for his comment. I've known the man for 40+ years. It doesn't bother him that I have an illness. He feels that I'm faking.

            The one that I've also heard is "Are you feeling better yet?"
            Dx 12/2006; first symptoms about 1984, but maybe earlier--on Gilenya and Ampyra.

            "God has a lot of explaining to do"--Frida Kahlo

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              #7
              Me - on the verge of tears. "I have MS". My colleague: "My Sister in law has MS. me "How is she doing"? her: "Terrible, she's bed-ridden"

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                #8
                My husband is always telling me someone we know who has MS doesn't have the same problems I do why am I having so much trouble.

                After about the 10th time of him saying this to me I finally said maybe because she doesn't have 3 kids and a husband to stress her out all the time. He hasn't said that since.

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                  #9
                  I get the "are you feeling better?" question from well meaning co-workers.

                  I want to say "it isn't the flu, I'll never feel better" but they don't know any better, and are trying to be nice, so I say "just the same".

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                    #10
                    So I get all those statements and questions all the time.
                    So, last week I posted on facebook that I do have ms, most of the issues I deal with on a daily basis and that there is NO CURE!! Some people thought I was too blunt, but I am so tired of you look so much better you must be feeling better. I guess those meds are starting to work. The shots of rebif must be doing the job.
                    No I feel like crap, I get up and get dressed because I'm trying to deal with this new "normal" I for the most part don't care to get up, do anything or specially deal with people. I am in pain always no matter how many pills I take.
                    Ok sorry venting. You have to just tell people. There is no cure there is just dealing with.
                    DIAGNOSED=2012
                    ISSUES LONG BEFORE
                    REBIF 1 YEAR

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                      #11
                      The one I truly hate being a single Mom and working full time on 12 hour night crews and on the nights I work I am elated to get 4-5 hours of sleep is

                      " Maybe if you got more sleep you would feel better "

                      Ok so then who is going to take care of my household chores and take care of my kids? Nope no one is offering.

                      OR

                      I have been fighting vertigo and greatly increased spasticity as well as increased fatigue the last week and a girl at work said to me
                      "Why are you here?"
                      She meant well but I just said..."for the same reason you are, a paycheck"

                      I get the are you feeling better also. Nope not any better most days are different than yesterday but not better...just different

                      Right after my diagnosis I had a girl say to me
                      "Well it could be worse Val, you could have cancer or something, it's not like you are going to DIE"

                      People just don't understand MS
                      DX 10/26/11

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                        #12
                        You know what you need to do - hot yoga.

                        Can't you just take some vitamins and stuff.

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                          #13
                          I had the wheelchair attendant at the airport (upon seeing my AFO brace and asking what I had), tell me I should look it up on the Internet, there is a cure! Gee, I never thought of that!

                          Then she said they have a cure in India (she was Indian)...um OK.
                          Prob MS 9-14-04; Dx PPMS 9-16-11; RRMS 12-15-11
                          Ampyra 10mg 2xday
                          Copaxone 1/20/12

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                            #14
                            Seems I always hear

                            about someone else who has MS and, of course (unfortunately), they're worse than me.

                            How about being told to take your mind off it and get busy so you don't think about it so much!!!!

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                              #15
                              I love it when people see the cane and ask "What happened did you hurt yourself?" I say "No I have Multiple Sclerosis." Then I get the deer in the headlight look and "Oh." You can tell by looking at them they do not have a CLUE what you are talking about. Then the icing on the cake "Well good luck with that." I find it comical.


                              Talking about everyone knowing someone with MS and doing great folks. My dear wife earlier this week came in and boldly exclaimed "So and So has a niece with MS and she is taking XYZ (DMD) and she is doing great. No symptoms at all!"

                              I think my wife is in denial that my disease has progressed and I was pulled off my DMD.
                              Dx'd 4/1/11. First symptoms in 2001. Avonex 4/11, Copaxone 5/12, Tecfidera 4/13 Gilenya 4/14-10/14 Currently on no DMT's, Started Aubagio 9/21/15. Back on Avonex 10/15

                              It's hard to beat a person that never gives up.
                              Babe Ruth

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