Hello all. I am new and wanted to say Hi. This is all pretty new to me, I have been doing research all night. I was just diagnosed 8 hours ago with MS, officially. 
My Brain MRI was just yesterday. I have cried and then stopped, trying to be calm and thinking positive. Then, I cry again in fear, then I feel I can do this and be positive again. At that time, I started feeling tingling in two of my fingers on the right and a few toes on my right side as well. Then, I got really scared. I have been researching and learning all night.
I am going to write my story because I need to get it out and feel very alone right now. I have the support and total love of my husband and kids (12 and 8 years old). But still, I feel alone.
4 days ago I woke up with double vision and the rest of the day I felt drunk in my head/somewhat dizzy especially when looking to the side. it has been the same thing for 4 days straight, double vision for 20 min then drunk feeling. I also have somewhat numb gums on the right side of my mouth and have lost most of my sense of taste on the right side of my tongue and mouth. All this happened at once!
I knew right away, what this could mean. My Birth Mother (we don't have much of a relationship because its so emotional, She has MS - was diagnosed 6 years ago). So I always knew, it could be a possibility for me.
For years, 12 years to be exact, I have had on and off chronic pain issues. (I am currently 37). It took years of doctors thinking I was a drug seeker or making it up and was finally diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. All these years, it never sat in my gut as 'true'. I thought I must be in denial. I always would say to people, well...I "supposedly" have fibromyalgia. I always knew I did not have ALL the answers but wasn't sure why.
I have had depression on and off forever as well, of course.
So of course, I went to the Dr. about double vision. I am new here in Alpharetta, GA for a year now. I just picked a random Internal Medicine center online and went. I cried thru my appt because I knew this couldn't be good. She sent me for a full eye exam. I went that same day. My Eye exam came out perfect. The opthamologist said everything was favorable and he did not see optic neuritis and that my vision was 20/20 in each from my lasik 6 years ago. He said, for sure ...continue with the brain MRI I had scheduled the next morning (yesterday). So, I was feeling pretty optimistic! But still, weird symptoms what gives?
I was totally scared about the next morning, of course. I had my MRI. The MRI guy said, "you shouldn't worry too much, everything looks fine". He probably should not have said that to me!!! He obviously was not seeing what the radiologist and my dr. saw in the scans. But he was super nice, so I can't be mad at him. But, leaving that, I thought, great I think I am out of the woods, wow.
Next day, today, woke with double vision again - day 4. Or is it 5? Im so emotionally drained, Idk. I thought, well this has to all be something, plus the numb right side of tongue, etc. I had a flare up of neck pain the previous 2 weeks so I thought maybe this is all related?
Doctor calls me today with the results from radiologist and says "unfortunately, your scans show evidence of MS". Wow. I instantly cried and she said she'd refer me to a good neurologist.
Monday, is my appt. with someone she recommended.
Now, I guess I am afraid to hear about What kind of MS I have specifically. Or maybe more tests need to be done first like a lumbar puncture? I am just hoping it is not too aggressive, can they tell that from the scan?
The doctor on the phone did say "Well, at least we caught it early". Man, she must think I live my whole existence crying every minute. It's all she knows of me.
So, if we caught it early, then what of my pains and issues these previous years? idk, I really have a lot to learn.
I am trying to stay positive. Here is what I know, MS is not a death sentence. As long as I can be here for my kids and be around my kids as they grow up, that is ALL that really matters in my world. It could be worse. It is not cancer, it is not a brain tumor. I realize I may have sucky relapses but I am going to try my best to stay healthy and keep them away. We shall see..
Sorry so long!!! But this is all so new to me and I need to get it out. I need to not feel alone.
Thank you for reading this.
Love, Light and Healing ^i^
Willow (Gina)
My Brain MRI was just yesterday. I have cried and then stopped, trying to be calm and thinking positive. Then, I cry again in fear, then I feel I can do this and be positive again. At that time, I started feeling tingling in two of my fingers on the right and a few toes on my right side as well. Then, I got really scared. I have been researching and learning all night. I am going to write my story because I need to get it out and feel very alone right now. I have the support and total love of my husband and kids (12 and 8 years old). But still, I feel alone.
4 days ago I woke up with double vision and the rest of the day I felt drunk in my head/somewhat dizzy especially when looking to the side. it has been the same thing for 4 days straight, double vision for 20 min then drunk feeling. I also have somewhat numb gums on the right side of my mouth and have lost most of my sense of taste on the right side of my tongue and mouth. All this happened at once!
I knew right away, what this could mean. My Birth Mother (we don't have much of a relationship because its so emotional, She has MS - was diagnosed 6 years ago). So I always knew, it could be a possibility for me.
For years, 12 years to be exact, I have had on and off chronic pain issues. (I am currently 37). It took years of doctors thinking I was a drug seeker or making it up and was finally diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. All these years, it never sat in my gut as 'true'. I thought I must be in denial. I always would say to people, well...I "supposedly" have fibromyalgia. I always knew I did not have ALL the answers but wasn't sure why.
I have had depression on and off forever as well, of course.
So of course, I went to the Dr. about double vision. I am new here in Alpharetta, GA for a year now. I just picked a random Internal Medicine center online and went. I cried thru my appt because I knew this couldn't be good. She sent me for a full eye exam. I went that same day. My Eye exam came out perfect. The opthamologist said everything was favorable and he did not see optic neuritis and that my vision was 20/20 in each from my lasik 6 years ago. He said, for sure ...continue with the brain MRI I had scheduled the next morning (yesterday). So, I was feeling pretty optimistic! But still, weird symptoms what gives?
I was totally scared about the next morning, of course. I had my MRI. The MRI guy said, "you shouldn't worry too much, everything looks fine". He probably should not have said that to me!!! He obviously was not seeing what the radiologist and my dr. saw in the scans. But he was super nice, so I can't be mad at him. But, leaving that, I thought, great I think I am out of the woods, wow.
Next day, today, woke with double vision again - day 4. Or is it 5? Im so emotionally drained, Idk. I thought, well this has to all be something, plus the numb right side of tongue, etc. I had a flare up of neck pain the previous 2 weeks so I thought maybe this is all related?
Doctor calls me today with the results from radiologist and says "unfortunately, your scans show evidence of MS". Wow. I instantly cried and she said she'd refer me to a good neurologist.
Monday, is my appt. with someone she recommended.
Now, I guess I am afraid to hear about What kind of MS I have specifically. Or maybe more tests need to be done first like a lumbar puncture? I am just hoping it is not too aggressive, can they tell that from the scan?
The doctor on the phone did say "Well, at least we caught it early". Man, she must think I live my whole existence crying every minute. It's all she knows of me.
So, if we caught it early, then what of my pains and issues these previous years? idk, I really have a lot to learn.
I am trying to stay positive. Here is what I know, MS is not a death sentence. As long as I can be here for my kids and be around my kids as they grow up, that is ALL that really matters in my world. It could be worse. It is not cancer, it is not a brain tumor. I realize I may have sucky relapses but I am going to try my best to stay healthy and keep them away. We shall see..
Sorry so long!!! But this is all so new to me and I need to get it out. I need to not feel alone.
Thank you for reading this.
Love, Light and Healing ^i^
Willow (Gina)
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